Judge — April 2, 1898 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A LITERAL SELL. Witty —" That fellow has seen a people pass in their checks.” xES—"" Is he 2 westerner?" Wirry—""No; he'sa baggage-clerk.”” PREPARED. The fool—"\t’s no use trying to April-fool some people.” The friend—* What's the matter?” The fool— We pinned a‘kick-me’ sign on Jones, but he'd already put a board full of nails in VERY CONSIDERATE, his trousers,” Miss OLetimes—** I am not quite sure whether he loves me or not. He hasn't asked me for a lock of my hair yet.” Miss Newsupp—** Why, of course he loves you—if he is so considerate as that.” THE DAFFODIL. THE bees came out one April day, ‘And spring was late and cold ; The crocus drooped its pretty head Above the chilly mould. But close within a crinkled bud Of texture silken-thin Still lay the golden daffodil ; So all the bees went in, ‘The bees came out a windy morn ; The garden still was bare ; A hint of winter's silver frost Was sparkling in the air, But where the tulip, gay and tall, ‘A cup of crimson drained, The daffodil its glory spread ; So all the bees remained. MINKA IRVING, OVERGROWN. : IT WAS the first time Beth had AN INSURANCE ASSURANCE. seen an eel, My!" she " Ve vas so vell agquainted dot I feared you vouldn’t like id uf T inshured mit anoder gombany.” aid, “I caae beta Nod ad all. Ve vas so vell agquainted dot 1 vas cerdain dot uf you inshures mit anoder gombany you S2!0, Devel an oc emnc ores at vas loogking aftder mein indrusts as vell as your own.” angle-worms grew ‘s big ’s that.” WHAT PEOPLE /VTEND TO SAY, AND WHAT THEY DO SaY. ** Confound it ! train goes at three- rad “Oh, George! I'm so mad I can fh 3 flees ee fe steer ae “Say! why the blazes haven't hardly speak. That dressmaker has 4 <hTectived the dress, Mrs. Stich, Trane TT a vitht down there ami You called for my trunk—say? What! ruined my new dress. I’m going right tivaiy mate a alight alteration in. the eng fh ee tok oF thet ir avof man just gone after it? Oh, allright. up there and tell her that she must pay ju70J, mace f Shg ie StchinOn & A he dota ae wrest | think of thelr way Ol Thanks!" (Hurrics out) me full damages. If she refuses I'll Fumming OF the walst. Ctherwise ing business. Hanging is too good Till seratch bes eyes outs” dress is very satisfactory. for such negligent people.” comicbooks.com