Judge — December 18, 1897 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Christmas Judge. THE WAY OF THE WORLDLING. WANT to buy a little something for a young lady.” said the young man with the waxed mustache and ba odor to the aged jeweler. "Yes, sir.” responded the jeweler blithely, as he laid his hand hesitatingly upon a tray of paste diamonds and imitation pearls, “Is she a sister, or a cousin, or a —something in that line, eh >” “Oh, no.” cried our hero of the perfumed coun- tenance, “she is not a relative—only a friend—a quaintance—in fact—er—it is for Miss Dolly Shakalegge. the skirt-dancer.” “Oh, I see,” said the jeweler, going quickly to the safe and produc- ing a tray of genuine brilliants; “then you want something like this,” and he held up a little fifty-dollar brooch that flashed and glittered in the sun- light like a caliph’s diadem. -ram DOUBLY LIGHT. case thoroughly, and you should seek lighter employment.”* hope she isn’t ill THE ONE DESIRE. I" S each woman, ‘man and child, From Maine down to the isthmus, Can now be only reconciled By a bicycle for Christmas. Reverend Mr. Gooptas: ‘The young man made a quick calculation of what he owed for board, dress-suit, winter underclothes, and gold crown work on six front teeth, room and laundry, rum, tobacco, shaves, daily papers, shines, having and finding that he could easily buy the fifty-dollar brooch and still have his trousers pressed, borrowed money, flowers, confectionery, installment cnough left to temporarily stave off these fiends of the creditor class, he purchased the gem. “And now,” he said, thoughtfully, as he deposited Miss Shakalegge’s trifle in his vest pocket and turned in a half-uncertain manner toward the door, “I suppose I ought to buy a little something for my dear old mother.” “Of course, of course; you must not forget the old folks!” cried the jeweler warmly, as he placed the tray of “genuines” back in the safe and turned lightly to the next customer; " you will find a ten-cent store right across the way CHARLES H weST, WEEKLY DUTY IN CHICAGO. Matd—" Mrs, Lakefront is very busy to-day and says she cannot be seen.” Caller—" Dear me! 1 Maid—" No, ma'am; this is her day for opening sealed proposals.” A VALUABLE GIFT. “So your grandmother gave you anice big gilt bible, all full of pictures of angels and saints, did she? I hope you will make good use of it.” . ‘Tommy Turrnut—"* I have, sir—I swapped it onto blind boy fer dis bob-sled. comicbooks.com