Judge — December 4, 1897 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATRS AND CANADA IN ADVANCE. One copy, one year. or s2 numbers - $5.0 One copy, siz months. or 26 numbers - 2.50 One copy, for thirtzen weeks - nas Incliding the Cumistmas Juoca. FOREIGN Soreign count o year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupce BurLoina). Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. CRIPTIONS —To alt im the postal union, $6.00 (Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly tm the world. (7 NOTICE TO PUALISHERS.—The contents of Jupce are provected by copy ‘nght in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted, WHEN MR. PLATT puts his hand on New York state it is hardly ever there. THE NEW BOY has convinced Grover that marriage is a grand, sweet yell. A PAPER has a long article on the necessity of burying Platt. Well, now, when did Thomas dig himself out? THE FORTY WOMEN who want to marry Luetgert unavoidably sug- gest a tremendous temptation to the father of wickedness. PAPER in Havana wants somebody to lynch a few Americans in that town. The man to do the business is not the editor of the paper, we feel sure. ISS WILLARD wants work- ingmen to have palatial clubs where they can lounge and rest as in a saloon. Isn’t that kindness at the expense of their women and children? NE COLLEGE has forbid- den foot-ball because a stu- dent was killed in a game of that kind. Recently a young man was drowned. Shall there, ac- cordingly, be no more fishing? eee Just BEFORE election there was a parade in Brooklyn of nine thousand anti-swearers. The sufferings of this band of reformers, in view of the excite- ment of the canvass, must have been intense. eee WE ARE TOLD by Emma Goldmann that the time is not far distant when the an- archists will own the earth; and we certainly know that every one of them ought to have six feet of it without delay. TRAVELING AMERICAN: satchel there.” “* No, sir. Me. CROKER’S OBJECTION to personalities reminds one of the ob- jection of a man to being hanged, That man’s argument was that the sheriff had all the advantage in the game and he stood no chance whatever. A NEW CLUB in Cape May, composed of bachelor maids, has resolved that no member shall marry unless all the other maids give their consent, It will presently have to hold its meetings under the protection of the police, and possibly of the militia. oe. A CLERGYMAN in Kentucky having declared that there was no hell and no devil, his congregation fired twenty shots at him and he left town in great haste. There's a mighty sight of comfort in the idea of future punishment, and lots of people are unable to keep church without it A GATHERING of Irishmen at Dublin named Gladstone as “the man who betrayed Ireland.” The most recent betrayers of Ireland were the men who lid the murders in Phoenix park, and there are suspicions that they did them through fear of Irish independence and the consequent loss of the regular contributions to their livelihood. EVERYBODY HIS OWN TRUNK. Customs-oFFicer—"‘Any of that baggage yours, sir?” HOW DO YOU LIKE IT NOW, WILLIAM McKINLEY? HE ASTUTE and resourceful Senator Platt, through the emphatic utterances of a cabinet-officer and a department chief, made our amia- ble president take a hand in the Republican factional quarrel in New York We How will he like it if the Republicans lose New York state next fall with all the elective state offices, and if they lose the legislature, and if Senator Murphy goes back to the senate in 1899, perhaps to cast the decisive vote against the Republican currency-reform city this fall. We wonder what the president was thinking of then, wonder what he thinks now, measure and against everything else for which President McKinley and How will he like it if Democratic control of the greater New York and of all the state depart- his party stand pledged before the’ people? ments, and of the legislature, gives Tammany the coveted chance to repeal all the election-reform laws that stand in the way of its old thieving elec- tion methods and thus fixes New York firmly in the Democratic electoral column in 1900 and prevents the re-election of William McKialey to the presidency? How will our too amiable and obliging president then like the retrospect of 1897? And the sad and unfortunate Folger episode rises, like a spectre in politics, to make answer. IS IT CHRISTIAN-LIKE? HE FORMER HUSBANDS of a Nebraska woman meet annually with her and her present husband and always have a good time. It is not quite certain that this is a proper appli- cation of the direction to forget and forgive; but, anyhow, it is better than the inharmo- nious gathering whose purpose is a row, AN IGNORANT MAN. THE REMARK of George Fred Williams that he keeps well informed by not read- ing the newspapers is not cunning. He might as well say that he is well informed because he takes pains to avoid all possi- \ ble information. The man who doesn’t SS read at least. one newspaper \ __ knows just enough to be proud \ of his ignorance and is unavoid- — ably a bore CHARITY FOR THE RICH. THE FUND started by Igna- tius Donnelly to pay off the mortgage on Mrs Lease’s house is the most absurd yet. Mrs. Lease’s failure to pay up the mortgage is not a matter of pov erty but of principle. She doesn’t think it would.be right to pay the money, and besides she needs it, as her Kansas friends think, to gratify her love of extravagant dress. Of course there must be funds; but, as we have already suggested, why not get up one for the amelioration of the sufferings of the Vanderbilts ? ‘All the baggage I have is in that little | WORKING THE WRONG WAY. THE ZEAL of an Iilinois woman who set out to convert a professional gambler was not tempered with discretion, There was a man who shut himself in his room to color his meerschaum. “I'll color you, blank you!” he said angrily; but when they found him he was dead—the pipe had colored him, And this gambler was fascinating enough to convert the woman; she left her husband and ran away with him. And now comes the sadder part of the story. She sickened of him, and the husband has accepted her apologies and taken her back to his arms. VIDE FRED GRANT AND THE YOUNGER HARRISON. THE SON of Grover Cleveland is to be congratulated that he was born too late to be called the prince. That title affixed to the name of a young man means the grossest of abuse on the part of the newspaper reporters. They follow him wherever he goes. Let him be wise and a good fellow and they grow humorous over him just the same. Let him submit to interviews and they misrepresent him. Let him refuse to be interviewed and they insult him to his face and afterward in print. He is a marked man, and malice follows him as naturally as his own shadow. Let the little Grover thank heaven that his father is too old ever to be president again. comicbooks.com