Judge — October 9, 1897 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

wliage. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE. Qne cooy, one year. or 52 numbers - $5. $5.00 One copy, six months, or 96 numbers - 2.50 One copy. for thirteen weeks - = 1.85, Tnclading the Custsrwas Juoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS —To all s Sorcign countriss in the postal union, $6.00 ‘THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupcr BurLpING), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. im larger than any other cartoon weekly in the world. §- NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Jupce are protected by copy- Fight in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be Promptly and vigorously prosecuted. MB: ANDREE is unavoidably postponed on account of the inclemency of the weather. [N MARRYING Miss Dortch the aged General Longstreet has reaf- firmed his belief in the confederate state. MARK HANNA says the senate is not a collection of fossils; and we have pretty good proof of it in the fact that Mr. Hanna is there himself. [* HAVING turned out that a Virginia white man recently lynched was inno- cent, it is the solemn duty of the “best people” of the lo- cality to lynch the lynchers. eee «sTTILLMAN slashes right and left,” says the Rochester Democrat. Yes, but mostly backward; and the dexterity with which he blacks his own eyes is worthy of great praise. THE QUESTION, Should a woman chew gum?” reminds one of another just promulgated by a professor of etiquette, “If a man takes a lady-to see a corpse must the lady take his arm?” ILLMAN and his popo- cratic enemies in his own state call one another dogs and liars with both force and effusiveness,and threaten per- sonal encounters. Could any- thing be more convincing? THE KANSAS PREACHER who agitates himself against ice-cream at church socials is so fiendishly radical that some day he will ery out for a little of that alleviator to cool his parched tongue. THE REVEREND FRANK VROOMAN of Chicago, who says he has been frozen out of one church and starved out of another, and that therefore he will go to the Klondike, is evidently fascinated with pre- cisely that kind of misery. STRANGER (in Arkansas)— at that." LAWYER WRIGHT of Rome, Georgia, declares that “ of all the cow- ards God ever made the greatest coward unhung is the man who joins a mob: Let the ‘south, which boasts largely of its courage, take that view of lynchiig and that kind of lawlessness will some day end. And is it not the right view? Think of hundreds or thousands against one ‘nian, thirsting for his blood, too often without regard to his guilt or innocence. A WRITER in the London A/ad/ thinks there is going to be war between England and the United States, and that as a result the English had better rectify the Canadian frontier by annexing Maine, Vermont, New Hampshire, and a part of New York; and after that Alaska and the Sand- wich islands, There are some kinds of impudence that cannot be done justice to in any language. The only thing to do with this writer is to catch him and box his ears. STRETCHING THE TRUTH. “the poor fellow swore that he didn’t steal the horse, and after you'd lynched him you found out he'd told the truth about it?” Store-Keerer—" Ves; and the coroner was right-smart puzzled for a spell what kind of a verdict to bring in, but he finally called it "a case of stretching the truth ‘and let it go AN OBVIOUS MISTAKE, WHEN MR. WORTH says Mr. Platt is. both a snake and a cur he outrages credulity. It must be manifest to even his understanding that no man or animal can be both of those things at one and the same time. There is such ignorance as to natural history, or at least such thoughtlessness, in this world as might make the angels weep. A FATAL CONFESSION. WEYLER SAYS he would have pardoned Evangelina Cisneros long ago but for the fuss made about her. That is Spanish justice, is it? The girl in jail over a year without a trial, and kept theye because of the sympathy created by that horrible injustice! Such judicial barbarity as that is the reasoning of childishness—and the man confesses it! WHERE SILVER WILL TRIUMPH. OTE THAT all the Democratic conventions either indorse Bryan and silver, or, owing to the pressure of local topics, omit mention of them. Then look ahead to nineteen hundred and inform yourself as to the probability of the fight of ‘ninety-six being fought over again. Pros- perity? What do the cranks know of that? Silver down? They be- lieve in every reason for that except the right one. A KIND OF JOURNALISM. PAGES OF PICTURES and reading-matter were given up to Richard Croker by two dailies of this, ey on his arrival from Europe the other day. They told how he ate, drank, slept, talked, walked, winked, smiled, dressed and undressed. ‘The result, we believe, was the supremest dis- gust the city ever felt. If it was not flunkeyism it was the silliest. of all possible slush by way of personal re- venge or political opposition ; and the only man of the crowd who didn’t suffer from it was Mr. Croker. OFFICIAL DUTIES. THE GEORGIA MAN who, about to be hanged, insisted that Governor Atkin- son should come into his cell and pray with him was quite unreasonable. Our mayor thinks he has sacrifice enough to undergo when he feels obliged to kiss the bride of a couple he has married; and the pardon business under Governor Morton was one of the most painful parts. of that amiable man’s experi- ence. The murderer must not claim too much. He al- ways knows that he is going from the gallows to heaven, and that ought to be glory enough for him. ARGUMENT AGAINST CONDITIONS. THE LABOR LEADER who says that low wages come from the com- petition of women, and that this is why male workmen cannot afford to marry, is more or less right; but unfortunately women have to live somehow, and they must have money to do it. The difficulty with labor leaders is that they look at things as they ought to be and not as they are; but capital as well as labor is subjected to conditions most of which are inevitable, For, of course, the women can't be assassinated; and, after all, affection rules to some extent, and there are proportionately more mar- riages among the very poor than the very rich. THE TRULY AND ONLY “PURE. The intemperance in speech of some eminent prohibitionists is one of those puzzles ‘which seem to be unsolvable. Living abstemiously and shunning the bottle, they are yet more reckless in stateaient and exuberant in their verbosity than many a pdlitician who cannot lay claim to their virtues.— Evening Sun. HIS PECULIARITY of radical temperance men, and likewise of labor agitators, is as wide-spread as the organizations they represent. They are as malicious as cranks and as profane and profuse in what they call severity as populists. They would rather kill the Republican party, though that is a temperance party, than see it succeed. Why is it? There are wise men among them who know that epithet doesn’t convince. Do they not provoke the old assumption that the bottle, though bad, is an escape- valve for the wickedness which dwells more or less in the breast of every individual? comicbooks.com