Judge, 1897-07-24 · page 4 of 16
Judge — July 24, 1897 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
# Judge Magazine Page Analysis This page contains several unrelated humorous vignettes typical of Judge's satirical style: **"Windows"** mocks a typographical error: "memorial widows" instead of "windows" in a church notice—a simple pun on homonyms. **"The Tri-Color"** references marital suspicion: a husband's coat contains red, white, and blue chips, suggesting gambling or infidelity—the "cloud" on their marriage. **"A Barn-Yard Etching"** is whimsical verse about a pig sleeping, with fanciful observation. **"An Engaging Talker"** jokes about a suitor who only proposes—his "engagement" consists of proposing marriage. **The fishing illustrations** show a "bad boy" prank: throwing mud at a fisherman, who mistakes it for a fish bite, then catches the boy on the return cast—poetic comeuppance. **"Hoist by His Own Petard"** depicts a prospective buyer's dialect humor criticizing a horn's mouthpiece proportions. **"Ho! Every One That Thirsteth"** plays on New York's abundance of liquor saloons versus drugstores—the druggist's wink suggests they're similarly stocked. Most humor relies on wordplay, dialect, and everyday social situations rather than specific political references.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
WINDOWS. oe —"" said the editor. He looked ap- prehensively toward the door. Then he read aloud: “Saint Paul's church has a number of very beautiful memorial widows.” “It’s not so bad, after all,” he mused, “but I should have pre- ferred to have it spelled as written.” QUALIFYING, Sister—" 1 de- clare, Jack, the hours you are keep- ing and the way you are ‘sowing wild oats’ is some- thing dreadful!” JUDGE'S FAVORITES. Jack—"\ know CHARLOTTE BEMRENS- MANTELL, it, sis. I mean to Within a wondrous picture now you stand. ‘The light that never was on sea or land. ‘There shines alway ; the disposition antic With pas And mir In bei alternates in wildering play, ‘and sadness hold alternate sway : , Life’s magic mirror—the Romantic. THE TRI-COLOR. A CLOUD had appeared in the sky of their connubial bliss, a cloud no bigger than 3 man’s hand, These dimensions, though small, were exact. She had just discovered some red, white and blue chips in his coat-pocket. A BARN-YARD ETCHING, ALONG the dreaming porker I watch the sunbeam shine And ripple on the shanghai ‘That perches on his spine. A rosy ball of slumber, She ne'er unfolds her legs — It is a blooming prescience Of luscious ham and eggs. AN ENGAGING TALKER. Mae — “Mr. Smoothe called on me last night. He's a perfectly lovely conversationist.”” Marie —" What did he say?” Mae —“ Just proposed ; that’s all.” The bad boy throws fisherman, who— ——thinking it a bite, wildly swishes up his pole- line, which —— HOIST BY Suage reform and join the salvation army, but I've got to make a record first.” New - Yorker (at Asbury Park)—" Why are there so many drug-stores here?” — connects with the bad boy on the return cast, maklug the way of the transgressor-— HIS OWN PETARD. JUDGED FOR HIMSELF, PRosPECTIVE PURCHASER —"* Yas, dat am a vewy fine hohn, an‘ cheap at de price, but it strike me dat de mouf-piece am sorter out ob de propor- shun,” HO! EVERY ONE THAT THIRSTETH. Druggist—" Why are there so many liquor- saloons in New York ?” New - Yorker —" Do you mean to tell me that “—— Drugg ist (winking) — “1 mean to tell you nothing.” New - Yorker —* Oh, | see. best you have.” Give me the RETURNED THE COMPLIMENT. E TACKLED a bottle of wine, And he made it look silly, he stated ; But the bottle soon got him down fine, For it promptly reciprocated. FOR THAT FULL FEELING. Modern wife (three a. m.) —“ Here is your pepsin gum, love.” Same old husband (unsteadily) — "Two pack’ges, m’ dear— t-two pack’ges. Ish a ver’ bad a'tack.” mud at the sleeping comicbooks.com