Judge — July 3, 1897 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

idee. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE. One copy, one year. or 2 numbers - $5.00 One copy, six months, or 26 numbers - 2.50 One copy, for thirteen weeks - - = 1.2 Including the Cxnistas Juoce. FPORBIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS —To alt Sovcign countrias im the postal wwion, $6.00 ‘year. THe JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupce BUILDING), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. [Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly im the world. (4 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Juoae are protected by copy- ght in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of thie copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. SESSIONS of the senate are now mentioned as the regular and the executive Tillman, E SUSPECT Ensign Stone of a design to use the navy in the capt- ure of young Miss Condé. Pon WHEN MARK TWAIN wants to advertise he doesn't lose his dia- monds; merely his health. * . IENNIAL SESSIONS of the New York legislature are under discus- sion, Why not centennial? eee THE LYNCHING in Urbana, Ohio, has produced a situation that may oblige the state and the local officials to lynch each other. eee [7 1S TRUE that much gold goes out of the country; but we may get some of it back in Richard Croker’s success on the English | turf. see JOSEPH JEFFERSON, with ve- hemence, five minutes after a rapid descent from his bicycle— “Are we so soon forgot when we are dead?” THE MAN who sends letters to Speaker Reed threatening him with assassination is not aware, we suppose, that his action is unparlia- mentary. Racoy Recov- dismissed yer case?” Beery BARNAT Kacey Recoy THE HARD TIMES have oblig- ed the shah of Persia to reduce his harem to sixty-two wives. are strictly his own, judge sent me up fer tree mont’s.” He's no Chicagoan, however, The wives eee AMELIA E. BARR says the new woman is-to go and the old-fashioned woman is to come back to stay. So that if revolutions do not go backward they. at least wobble. A MOONSHINER who pleaded that he was the sole support of six wives.and thirty-nine children ought to have been able to prove that there was no such thing as.a still within nine. miles of him. FUNERAL BELLS in Wheeling twice awakened to life the man for whom they were tolling; but they finally got the best of him, as they will in:time of anybody who is habitually obliged to listen:to them. THE JUBILEE, according to a London paper, will make ear-rings fash- . ionable again. We trust not. They are well enough in Africa, but Let us deal gently with the we ought not to get our fashions from there, ear-ring. 3 SS of Lemus! Ely Quigg tt being made chairman of the ‘i jot Nee York’ -gounty recalls a little musical Poputir with ‘tHe ‘thinstrels forty years ago, It ran something like 1 sipeiteshid 5 Ag *+* Boriotn, yerdown, I say! Go down and call the Republicans all— We're going to vote all day. * Said dat I needed rest in a quiet place fer a few mont’s.”” How did yer manage it?” Beery BARNATo—"* Didn't have ter manage it. A SAD TRUTH. E HAD intended to say something cunning about a recent earth- quake out west; but a disturbance nearer home has obliged us to make a cellar and some preparations to crawl into it, Earthquakes re- semble sicknesses; they are never funny unless they occur to somebody else, KILLING WITH NAUSEA. oe LET IT be demonstrated,” says a Spanish editor, “ that the Spanish people despise the jingoes of the United States and know how to spit in their faces one hundred times.” It seems strange that this kind of warfare hasn't been demonstrated in Cuba; though it must be admitted that General Weyler has come as near to it as possible. PERILS OF THE TOILERS. SOME WORKMEN in Buffalo have struck against a rule requiring them to wash their faces at twelve o'clock each day. This is not a land of liberty if men cannot wear an inch of dirt on their faces if they so choose. Let this tyranny go on and the struggling masses will presently be obliged by the beast of capital to change their shirts and clean their finger-nails after the delivery of every ton of coal. NO SUCH MIRACLE. ARTS OF THIS GOVERNMENT have had the idea, with Mr. Brice the Chicago alchemist, that lead can be transmuted into gold, and have spent much money on it without any success. Another Mr. Brice has succeeded in transmuting Ohio and New York into each other and back again; but the treasury department at Washington ought to be managed by men who are not only honest, but who are possessed of some moiety of common sense. A SOLDIERS’ PICNIC, N LUNCHING with Constantine recently our General Miles show- ed a disposition to study and en- courage the arts of peace. And it must have been a quiet lunch- con; for if the general, agitated by the pangs of hunger, had bitten sav- agely into a soothing sandwich, the serown prince would have inconti- nently run away. For, theoretically and practically, his highness is the blastedest. peace man that ever got into uniform to make himself pretty and please the girls. HELPED OUT JUDICIALLY. “*An'.wot adwice did de horspittle phesician give w'en he DON’T KILL THE WRONG MAN. It SEEMS UNJUST to charge the president with the epidemics. that exist in various places through- out the country. There, too, is the man who, having lost his mill by fire, immediately tore down some last-election placards speaking of McKinley as the advance agent of prosperity.. It ought to occur to the growlers, however much reason they have to growl, that there stand between the president and the people an overruling Providence and the senate of the United States. THE CONWAY ROADS TO PEACE, MONCURE D. CONWAY calls our:national senate a-rotten-borough body and says it ought to be abolished. This is because it rejected the arbitration treaty; and we must say that Mr. Conway is consistent in his peace principles, because he ran away from his home in Virginia just as soon as our civil war opened and has been an Englishman ever since. Again, as we are reminded by the Rochester Union, he wanted to com- promise the war by having the rebels abolish slavery, promising that in return the abolitionists would help them destroy the government. Got drunk dat day an’ a TO BE WRITTEN AFTER DEATH? 4s THE MARTIAN" is founded largely on hypnotism and the theory of the transmigration of souls. The Martian is invisible, and ap- pears to be the guardian angel of Barty, the chief hero of the book. She hypnotizes that gentleman, and makes hin get out of bed at night and write letters to himself at her dictation, She has lived thousands of years and remembers some portions of them; and in the last published install- ment of the work she is about to be born again, becoming the child of the blessed Barty. Thus we ought to have another story from du Maurier. If the Martian has the power attributed to her, why not du Maurier? comicbooks.com