Judge — June 26, 1897 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

436 A HYPODERMIC REVENGE. 1. Miss SkeTo—'*George, dear, you have blood in you eye. “Where are you going ?” MR. Skato—" That w. c. tu. crank made a swipe uapge DECISIONS HANDED DOWN. ONVENTIONALITY is the sop which individu- ality throws to society. Loving is the highest form of praise; envy the lowest. Men forget when they forgive ; women forgive when they forget. Dead friendship may dream of resurrection; but never dead love. ur A man’s greatest pun- ishment is to be a fool and me the other night and took a piece off one of my legs and know it; a woman's, to have strained my back. Now, | am going to get even with her.” DON'T GIVE UP HOPE. IFE isa race we all must run, And $0 let ring your laughter ; If you don’t get the heat down here You may in the hereafter. THE LADIES’ CHOICE, . ‘AH WOULD laik ter ‘quire, sah, whedder you hab sacrementous wine, sah, fo" de uses ob de chu’ch, sah,” said a portly colored gentleman, as he entered the drug: store, “Oh, yes,” said the drug- we sell quite a lot of it.” * Well, sah, ah m de pasture ob de Zion Mefodis’ chu’ch, sah, ob Hawkins’s Co’ners, an’ de. membahs ob de chu'ch done ‘p'inted me a committee ob one, sah, to buy some ob dat berry a'ticle, sah.” “Very glad to see you,” said the druggist. “I have a particularly choice unfermented wine that is much used in the city churches. Would you like to taste a little of it?” “Y-yes, sah, "Deed I would laik ter taste it; but fo’ de chu’ch use, sah, de ladies ob de congregation, sah, hab ‘spressed a decided pref‘ence, sah, fo" gin.” DAVID A. CURTIS. SS AT THE DEPARTMENT - STORE. AMANDA — "* What kind of a dish did he call thet, Silas?” SILAS —"* Ile called it a shaving-dish, an‘ T'll be gosh derned ef I don't git one on ‘em Ver see thar's, the razor a-stickin’ out of th’ dish, an’ th’ brush jest fits in thet hole in th’ top : an’ thar's yer lamp all ready ter be lit an’ heat yer water with. By gum, Mandy ! thet’s ‘bout the slickest thing I've seen in New York.” her charm fail. 3. W. C7. U. CRANK: To one class of women, men fell their troubles ; the other class sees that they have plenty to tell. The most needless worry in which we indulge is regarding our funeral expenses; if ouf™friends don’t bury us the health depart- ment will. VETER ERD, A REAL WAR RELIC. . HY do you call that sapphire W te y ppl A ‘relic of war’ ?* he said, And gazed upon the glistening thing AS blue as the sky o’erhead. She pressed the gem to her lips and sighed, ; As though it were dear to her; * Because I captured it,” she cried, “In my first engagement, sir ! "Fe CHRYSTAL. will have to get my specs ; really think my eyes are growing worse. — WOMAN'S WEAKNESS. Mrs, BenwaM—"‘ What were the last words of Mary, queen of Scots?" Bena — block straight. I suppose she asked if her head was on the PICTURES, THE mocn isa silvery sickle on the gate of the paradise wall Which only a loving thought or a beautiful deed unbars, When a soul gives self to the mortal a meteor flashes and falls ; ‘The angels have reaped the good of the day, and the shining sheaves are stars. RAMA FLAYTER SEABURY, AN EVASIVE ANSWER. Mamma, (sadly, holding up a nearly empty jar) —" Rachel, have you been at my preserves again ?” Rachel (intently combing her doll’s hair) — "Mamma, didn’t grandma teach you when you was a little girl, same 's you have me, not to be too “quisitive >” HER SALAD DAYS. Oo! of regard for sullen Jack, ‘A peppered look for timid’ Ned, ‘The salt of snubs to hold aback Presumptuous Ned, reproachful Fred. The vinegar of cutting glance, Dress each apart in separate scenes, Then mix together in a dance— So Miss Coquette preparesher greens, 4. ——Whoopoo ! comicbooks.com