Judge — May 22, 1897 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

wudge. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITRD STATES AND CANADA IM ADVANCE, One copy, one year. of s2 numbers - $5.0 One copy, six months, or 26 numbers - 2.56 One copy. for thirteen weeks - = 1.25 Inclading the Cunistmas Juoce, FORKIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS —To alt Soreien countries im the postal union, $0.00 ‘a year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (JuDGE BUILDING) Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. EW Circulation larger than any other cartoon weekly im the world. (7 NOTICE TO PURLISHERS.—The contents of Juoce are protected by copy- vght in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted, LAST WORDS of Congressman Holman—"'I object.” coe THE KAISER is one of those persons who rush in where angels fear to tread. THE WOMAN of this town who has nine husbands is believed to be looking for an umpire. I 1S about time for that air-ship to come down and resume itself as our old friend the sea-serpent. THE WAR-MAP does not kill, but it may drive more people to th insane-asylum than = the war itself. PAUNCEFOTE, it was feared at one time, wanted to officiate at the Grant obsequies as the’ | sacred remains, SURE that of the things jam- med through by several legislatures the little mat- ter of adjournment will be ratified at the polls. as see £ ONAL LIBER- TY down south is the liberty to lynch black men, If that is prohibited or abridged Senator Hill ex- pects to inquire into the reason why. ISS COUZINS advises every young woman to marry a husband. The lady is generally so radical, the wonder is that she doesn’t advise two, or perhaps a half-dozen. THE CLERGYMAN who wants five dollars for praying for the Kansas legislature ought not to get a cent. What a preposterous thing it was to pray for such a body as that, +s TURKS ADMIT A CHECK,” says a head-line in a daily newspaper. We believe that Weyler, in view of very hard times at Madrid and hence in Havana, would be mighty glad to do the same thing. eee HE RAPIDITY of Philadelphia in completing a monument to Wash- ington which was begun eighty-six years ago is startling. We have an impression, however, that it was begun before George was born, R. GODKIN in an article in the Aé/antic admits that independent voting is a failure. He doesn’t know exactly what to do now; but perhaps he would be satisfied with an enactment to the effect that every mugwump vote shall count a million, THE PROPOSITION to raise a million and a half dollars by native- born Americans as a jubilee gift to Queen Victoria is not good. The English look upon it with more contempt than satisfaction, apparently thinking, for one thing, that her majesty has money enough. If there must be so large a gift let us give it to the Vanderbilts and Astors and so keep it at home. Ie THE DANGERS OF TRAVEL, Fixst TRame (stealing ride on platform)—" Say, pard, I reckin dere’s somethin’ like five hun- dred barrels uv water in de tank uy dat tender. SECOND TRAMP—"* Great hevins! supposin’ dere wuz ter be a kolishun an‘ de t'ing shud tip up an’ spill it all over us?* A CHANOE OP SENTIMENT. AS WE HAVE SAID, Mr. Platt will not resign, no matter how the president ignores his favorites. Indeed, Mr. Platt has been heard to say, with all the earnestness of Mrs, Micawber in her occasional references to her Wilkins, “No; I shall never, never desert Mr. McKinley.” VICTORY FOR COMMON SENSE. HE AMENDMENTS to the civil-service law of this state practically abrogate the law itself, and are therefore to be commended. Let us congratulate Governor Black on the common sense that enabled him to remove the starch so effectually as to destroy its accompanying gar- ment. That is reform, and it ought to find its way to Washington, LITERATURE AND EGGS. HE BEST twelve short stories and the best ten short poems are agi- tating a number of news and other papers to such an extent that we may presently have another civil war. The fact that there may be a hun- dred short poems and a like number of short stories equally as good as those selected complicates matters and reminds us that there cannot pos- sibly be a satisfactory conclusion. But let the war go on. Yea; let the grocers offer prizes for the best ten eggs. PERSONAL LIBERTY. SENATOR HILL wants the Democracy to shriek for personal liberty. That, he perhaps thinks, will enable them to skip the money question so that they won't be embarrassed by a gold procession going one way and a silver one going the other, each trying to pass the other on the same track. He thinks the plan may work in this state, and searching-parties are now out in all the others to discover outrages on personal liberty by the fiendish contemporaries of the partisan other side. <a —SEVERY DAY A CELEBRATION. IR WALTER BE. SANT wants a Shake- speare holiday because it would be one which all the world might celebrate We have heretofore in- sisted that at least ten minutes shall be reserved every year for labor and business purposes, and we shall stick to it, It hae not yet been demanded that man shall earn his bread by putting on his best clothes and going around with his hands in his pockets. BURIAL BEFORE DEATH. AS A MAN aright to go into his grave for three days, then to be resurrected by a hypnotist? He makes a bargain to that effect, and perhaps needs the money. Does the law interfere with his personal rights when it forbids him the bargain? It may be his only source of revenue, and thereby his only resource against.a lingering death by starvation. Perhaps this question will come up in connection with some impending campaigns for and against the matter of personal liberty. LICENSE OF THE PRESS. HE ANTI-CARTOON BILL deserved to die, but it introduced a subject that will undergo discussion until some judicious enactment against the license of the press goes on the books. It ought to be possible to discriminate between decent and yellow journalism, and enact a reform without malice on the part of any legislator. Senator Ellsworth was per- haps honest in his intentions, but the reflection that must have followed the rejection of his bill will doubtless teach him to avoid injustice in his effort at reform next time. SHALL WE ACHIEVE THE IMPOSSIBLE? Ovt WEST are several societies of bachelor girls the members of which pledge themselves not to marry before they are twenty-five, and not then unless the men of their choice are able to support them without the drudgery necessary to idleness and poverty. There have been like societies ever since the world began, and there have been few girls who haven't married the men they loved, if so invited, regardless of age, time and circumstances. These things regulate themselves. Why try to change the natural action of the moon? comicbooks.com