Judge — November 28, 1896 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

346 . as he stole to the chamber-door and listened, then hung his hat over the key-hole, aud coming back whispered in the ear of the dying man, “Go in peace, my son. I also belong to the Adirondack fishing-club, and if fish-lies count heaven will be like a back street on circus-day. Vade mecum adios esperanza dirigo,” and a happy smile was mingled on the lips of the penitent with a gurgle of satisfaction as the relieved soul took its flight. A BONE TO BE DESIRED. DITH contemplated the anatomy of the turkey at the Thanksgiving feast and asked suddenly, Mamma, do people have wish- bones ?” “ No, dear,” “Well, do turkeys have everything they wish for ?” DATED AHEAD. Mr. Isaacstein — "Say, Rindskopf, I understand your store was burned out last Thurs- day?” Mr. Rindskopf —" No, sir: next Tuesday.” SERIOUS BUSINESS. AROLINE had been accus- tomed to hearing her grand- father say grace, but on a visit to her aunt's this daily function was neglected and the small girl com- mented on it. “You may ask the blessing, Caroline,” said her mother. So the child bowed her head and mumbled a few words. Glancing up she detected a sub- dued smile on the faces of those gathered at the table. Indignant, she exclaimed, “You mustn't laugh when I'm a-Godding !” glasses." THE SEASON OPENS. HORRIFIED look of remorse overshadowed the face of the dying man, and when the nurse came to his bedside he whispered, A by the bedside. Impatiently the dying man motioned all the by- standers from the room and listened until their footsteps died out along the corridor. Then he grove. Unsolicited and without reward I have lied. I have lied to my best friends and bosom companion. Perhaps there wil for me if I unburthen my soul. Listen! in all my life I never caught a trout that weighed a pound, or lost one that weighed eight ounces.” idge “Bring in my ghostly adviser.” The quiet man in black stole into the room and seated himself id faintly, “T have been a terrible liar, I have lied in court and camp and be hope A cold dew broke out on the brow of the ministering brother ALT. WORDEN, THEAT RICAL CASUALTY, A “theatre-fire" started in the pit of Bungtown hall last evening, but after some “rushing work” on the part of the star it soon subsided. A SOCIAL SUBTERFUGE, Excuse me, my dear; I believe I will have time before the second act to secure some opera- Slywink securing some opera-glasses. AN INEXCUSABLE MUFF. UNCLE SILAs (apropos of his clemen t-weather purchase) — What a tarnal eedyit I wuz ter y these ear-lappers withaout try- in’ “em on fer a fit fust.”” THANKSGIVING DAY. AT TEN. [ 8 SPITE of what the people said OF pilgrim fathers gray, I knew the mothers of the state Had made Thanksgiving day. For who could roast the turkeys brown, Who make the pumpkin-pies ? Did fathers ever make the cake, Or watch the pudding rise ? IN WAR-TIME, Thanksgiving day came twice one year Within the cottage door ; "Twas when from Gettysburg I came, ‘An empty sleeve I wore, My mother clasped her crippled boy, “Thank God for life,” she said. * How could I bear it if my son Slept with the nameless dead?” IN 1896, When all life's weary way is done Thanksgiving day will be That one when down the twilight path My mother's face I see. There only tearless kisses fall, No care or pain may come ; Please God, the old-time sweet caress Shall be my welcome home. MHS. NAL BM. ROR, THE KID. H1'S bppiness is now increased, ‘Thanksgiving being nigh ; Now he will have a turkey feast, Topped off with pumpkin-pie. THE GENUINE ARTI- CLE. Lady (admiring gifts at wedding)—“Ah! these are the souvenir spoons.” Matd (indignantly) —“ No, indeed, mum! They're solid silver.” comicbooks.com