Judge — November 7, 1896 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. ONTTRD STATES AND CANADA IN ADVANCE, One copy, one year. or s2 numbers - $5.00 One copy, six months, or 26 numbers - 2.50 One copy, for thirteen weeks - 138 Inclading the Cunistmas Juoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreien countries im the postal umion. $0.00 year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupce BuiLpiNc), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. ER We parantee advertisers a larger circulation than any other American satiri- lished. Tae Juvce, Jvoca’s Lineany and Juan's Quartenty are all for sale at Brentane's, Avenue del Opera, Paris: Smith, Ainslee & Co.,25 Newcastle itreet, Strand, Landon The Internation: . Chancery Le ¢. bach's News Bach "he Internal 18, Leipsic, Germa: + Geneva, Sw Cable addres Sat Se News Con Stephanstrasse nd. (7 NOTICE TO PURLISHERS.—The contents of Jupce are protected by copy- night in both the United States and Great Britain. lofringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. WHEN THE BUTTON disease is over thousands of men are going to catch cold. EVERY FLYING-MACHINE has one fatal defect. defect is that it can’t fly. The principal SURE SIG of a hard winter—The corn-husks are very thick, and Mr. Cleveland has quit fishing. eee THERE ARE NINE divisions of Tam- many hall, each opposed to all the others—and John C. Sheehan. M®- HILL thinks for his part that fire and water can be made to fuse. ‘That is his unwritten principle and law. THE FACT that wheat goes up while silver goes down punctures two- thirds of Mr. Bryan's argumentative tire beyond recovery. THE FATHER of Mr. Bryan favored honest money; but we must not for- get, in bebalf of the populistic method of argument, that he is now dead. see WE ARE TOLD by the Syracuse Post that the Democratic party is “sow- ing to the wind.” Well, where's the harm? Doesn't it furnish the wind, too? THERE MAY be a sort of providence in behalf of Thomas Watson. His throat is so sore that he can’t talk, and therefore he will get some votes. eee MB: BAYARD has the spirit of a man even against the danger of Eng- lish displeasure. He wrote a long letter in opposition to Bryanism and signed it with his own name. WILBUR F. PORTER ought to be aware that he is occupying the place to which John Boyd Thacher was regularly nominated. He is not only irregular, but a base usurper. RAN BLACK. it is argued by some newspapers, ought to be whipped becsuse a man in Troy has become a defaulter. there were the crimes of the Bender family in Kansas THE TWO or three up:the-state Democratic papers that fly the flag of Bryan devote themselves almost wholly to foreign and scientific mat- ters, and have had some of the most learned articles we ever read. ‘Then, too, eee ERHAPS the Democratic part advisable to save the pieces. will be continued. It may be found In that case the party will be built up from the fragment found at Indianapolis and the brief section dis- covered by the Shepard, or ship, Democracy in Brooklyn And thus shall the stone rejected by the silver builders become the head of the corner. “NOW, YOU SON-OF-A-GUN, GET YOUR HAIK CUT!" (From Jovan, April 215t, 184.) From a photograph of a native of Ohio who swears he will A not have his hair cut till he is assured of McKinley's election to the presidency of the United States. (Photograph sent to us by S.G. Koloson, Delpho, Ohio.) ABUSING THE DEAD. UOTATIONS from dead men by Mr. Bryan are generally so false that one wonders there isn’t an early resurrection for the purpose of retaliation. It’s a bad man who strikes another in that way when he is down or dead; and an educated people will make it as unprofitable as it is mean. But alas! Great Casar, dead and turned to clay, must open mouths to let the Bryans bray. WOMEN AS RECEIVERS. HREE WOMEN LAWYERS of this town have been appointed receivers in supplementary proceedings. The contesting parties have our congratulations. It is even possible that there may be settlements in their cases before the money involved is altogether exhatisted. For women are naturally honest and conscientious, and they are given to mercy in behalf of men who come within their jurisdiction, THE NEXT. ERHAPS TEMPLE HOUSTON will be the next pupocratic candidate for president. He is noble and lives out west. His picture shows a stalwart with a fine face, and he wears his trousers without suspenders. He killed a young man. Then the young man's father, who is a judge, spat in the face of one of his children; and then he killed the father. Many newspapers of his locality praise him for his nobility of character. We feel quite sure that he is likewise a cowboy orator. BUSINESS AND THE FLAG. M® HILL'S PAPER, the Elmira Ga- selte, insists that the flag shall have no candidates’ names on it. It holds, we suppose, that such names are a species of advertisement, and for that reason they defile the banner as might an announce- ment by any grocer. ‘There is much to be said on both sides of this proposition; but, in order to save space, let us come rapidly to the conclusion that the only proper place to advertise is in the prevailing newspaper. THE SUNDAY BICYCLE. PLYMOUTH CHURCH of Brooklyn invites young persons to come to its Sunday-school on their bicycles, and has provided racks for the safety of those vehicles. That is the beginning of the end. No man or woman will be chided for taking advantage of this sensible lib- eralism, and in due time every shed for the accommodation of horses on Sundays will be torn down. And thus the problem whether to work horses on Sunday for church purposes will be happily solved. REMARKABLE MAN. THE IDEAS IN PICTURES to which Mr. du Maurier devoted himself so many years were the brevities which come from analyzation and condensation. He studied fads and their effect, and knew them by heart; and a picture told their whole story, as Bret Harte’s “Heathen Chinee” told the story of the hatred nursed by certain classes for the invading Chinese. It is therefore the more curious that, at sixty, Mr. du Maurier should have written at such great length and so successfully. THEATRICAL SLUSH. A STAGE-KICKER has herself sued for a large milk-bill, and the evi- dence on the trial shows that she bathes in milk every day. The milk sold her is blue and has apparently been mixed with some pure but nevertheless repulsive water. Then the reporters get after her, and she gets columns of advertising for nothing. Shall we blame her, or for that matter the truly wicked sisters? Well, for one thing, the sensational dailies print too much slush and get in return for it nothing but disgust. TALKED HIMSELF TO DEATH. ++ TRILBY” has killed me,” said Mr. du Maurier just before he died. It strikes us that Mr. Bryan may truthfully say the same thing of his oratory. It was delightful at Chicago. It was for a time very success- ful. But it went on and on, and directly it invited the criticism which showed it to be sound without sense. The novelist made no mistakes, but he died. Mr. Bryan has many times been exhausted by his oratory, and in a few days he will pass on, to be heard of in national politics no more forever. comicbooks.co