Judge — October 3, 1896 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

“iage JEST ABOUT THESE DAYS. [ DUNNO what's tn’ reason thet along about this season, When th’ golden-rod is tallest an’ th’ gyarden ‘s gittin brown ; When I bear th’ dronin’, dronin’, An’ th’ apples in ‘th’ orchard one by one a-droppin’ down, Thet I sorter drop my hurry an’ fo'git about my worry, As | loaf aroun’ th’ pastur’ an’ enjoy th’ au- tumn haze ; An’ fo'git th’ cricket’s hummin’ as I feel th’ tear- drops comin’, An’ I somehow hear th’ voices thet I heard in other days. It's a sort of a reviewin’ what for years I been doin’, An’ childish play ; While th’ things most wuth which to-day I'm weepi Took advantage of my blindness an’ have vanished clean away. Yes, this autumn air is clearer, an’ it brings up objicks nearer, Or perhaps it multiplies em when I see ‘em through my tears, Mebbe thet may be th’ reason thet along about this season I kin see th’ loves I useter love arrayed along th’ years. T kin hear my mother singin’; I kin feel her han's a-clingin’ Aroun’ my boyish neck agin an’ see her lovin" gaze. I shall find my futur’ brighter, all my loads will be th’ lighter, For the dreams thet I'am dreamin’ as I loaf about these days, yet never met with an accident. Grimshaw—" Not at all. He always got some- body else to go up.” A DOUBTFUL COMPLIMENT. The soubrette (with a cynical smile, to the lead- ing lady, after the play)— “You gave a rare per- formance this evening, Miss K.; a rare perform- ance. Miss K. took this as a compliment, but she could not fathom that cyn- ical smile. She had for- gotten that one meaning of the word “ rare" is“ not well done.” AN EXAMPLE. Mrs. Cravwford—"\ never heard a good reason for being superstitious.” Mrs. Grimshaw— “Well, I once bought a dozen eggs. ‘The grocer put in thirteen, and when I got home they were all bad.” Wire, (seeeping)— A. T. WORDEN. HAD A GREAT HEAD. “You say he has been experimenting twenty years with his flying-machine and Isn't that remarkable?” ‘ickets honin’ ‘seems as ef th’ biggest things was on'y an’ th’ locusts ceepin’, an’ for BOTH UP ALL NIGHT, Summer, THE EVOLUTION OF THE T haven't slept a wink all night.” Husnanp (¢hic&ly)—"* Well, goodnesh ! (hic) neither have 1.” BICYCLE LET THE PUNISHM ENT FIT THE CRIME. Mrs, O'Beiex —'*Say, docther, me grown son Patsey says he's ‘most got give him, Oi dunno?’ Doctor (grimly) — Prussic acid, equal parts, th’ ‘silver faver." Phwat'll Oi “Give him strychnine and OF FIRST IMPOR- TANCE. oe HAT did the w crowd gather at the corner for, a few miu utes ago?” #A collapsed.” “I suppose they wanted to see how badly she was hurt.” “ No} they were try- ing to find out the name of the wheel.” man's wheel THE WAY SHE DOES IT. Mabel—“ Why has Miss Elderly taken up music?” Clara—" Because she wants to beat time.” ANOTHER VIEW. Hunker —"He died from a complication of diseases, I understand ?” Spatts—" Yes; either that or from a compli tion of doctors.” Winter. comicbooks.co