Judge — September 26, 1896 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

We, Annet Baxwwany Gritam Editor. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. ONITRD STATRS AND CANADA IM ADVANCE, Qne copy, one year. or 32 numbers - $5.00 NS One copy, six months, or 26 numbers = 2.50 Pe = ‘One copy, for thirteen weeks - = 1.35, Tnclading the Cusistuas JudGe. FORBIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all forcirn countries im the postal union, $0.00 year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (JupGe BuILpINc). Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. arantes advertisers a larger circulation than any other American satiri- lished. ere nd Juvce’s Quarranty are all for sale at Bi AS Ainaiee & Cones Newcastieitreet, Strand. ms Building, Chancery Lane, £. Ca Lom Mains, Germany The International News Co id ty ChE. Alioth, Geneva, Steitaerland a iopoe 7 NOTICE TO PURLISHERS.—The contents of Juncs are protected by copy- fght in both the United States and Great Britain. Lofringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. LET US NOT despair of the administration, no matter if Smith has left it, While there's life there's Hoke. + fess THE DISPOSITION to scorch will provoke a law providing that riders shall ride a brake with a bicycle attachment. NO DEBATE. R. MCKINLEY will not lower his dignity or waste his time by argu- ing with men whose arguments refute themselves. They are their own sufficient enemies, and the fact supplies itself for every false premise they present. Why talk against the east wind? THE OTHER SOUND-MONEY TICKET. THE TICKET nominated at Indianapolis gives Democrats who wor- ship regularity a chance to vindicate that affection and at the same time to vote against the revolutionary programme of the men who have stolen the name and machinery of the Democratic party. It is better to vote for McKinley straight, but anything is better than to vote for Bryan and repudiation. THE SNAKE-SWALLOWING IN CUBA, HE WAR in Cuba has resolved itself into an effort on both sides to destroy everything of value on the island. That kind of warfare has gone far enough. It is especially destructive of large interests in this country. Humanity calls for interference; and if the president won't act on the authority given him by the last congress, the coming one should do something effective. THE ART OF BLASPHEMY. HE NAME of the Messiah is frequently used in connection with Mr. Bryan and Mr. Watson. Their admirers cannot be earnest without being blasphemous. They are not conservative as to their thinking or their speaking, and they use the bible as a weapon with which to beat out the lives of their adversaries. The Arabs resemble them. They, too, have had two Messiahs within the last twenty years, Unitantancous photographs of Mr. Bryan, from life, taken during his campaign trip to the cast.) THE ALL- MOUTH CANDIDATE. The Junce, through the kindness of the Council Bluffs (Iowa) Nonpareil, has the pleasure of presenting to its readers snap-shot pictures of Mr. W. J. Bryan, candidate for president of the United States on the populist ticket. HEY SAY that Mr. Li is a poet. We have suspected something of that kind from the pecufiarity of his handwriting. WHEN TOM WATSON takes the stump he pulls it up by the roots and carries it around with him, as Mr. Li carries his coffin. [S MR. SEWALL aware that if he doesn’t get off that ticket he will offend most of his populistic brethren and never, never get elected? = FORGET the exact verse; but, speaking of the New York Repub- lican state ticket, the noblest place for man‘ to vote is where he votes for Vann, eee ARMERS OUT WEST cornplain that they can get only ten cents a bushel for their potatoes. Why don’t they multiply the crop, as Bryan proposes with regard to silver? eee RRY HILL is praised by the newspapers; not because of the all- around goodness which brings no compliment, but because of the mites of honesty which appeared unexpectedly in his all-around depravity. cee THE SPECTACLE of the women in the St. Louis rabble unavoidably leads to the conclusion that women who respect themselves will keep out of politics. Doubtless they have the right to vote; but the prelimi- naries are simply shocking Take a good look, then vote for him “early and often” if you can. A SILVER BOURBON. NOAH PRAYED for rain and got a flood, and then he prayed for dry land, The editor of the New York Journal says he was inconsist- ent, and we guess he was; bat .consistency is controlled somewhat by conditions, and what is good to-day isn’t always good day after to-morrow. We have heard of doctors who give the same kind of medicine for every disease year in and year out, While they are consistent, their patients die. MASSES AND CLASSES. WHY THE MASSES against the classes? The rich classes? The business classes? The classes that cling to ideas shown a thou- sand times to be correct? The war veterans who insist on getting their pensions in good money? The workers who have the same desire? Why, these classes constitute the bulk of the people. The masses are populists a little more numerous than those three tailors of Tooley street who spoke for the people of England. ARGUMENT AND SITUATION. LORD RUSSELL'S TALK at Saratoga for peace through arbitration was an utterance for common sense that, wise and good as it was, should have been unnecessary. Alll religion and all government are for peace as a foregone conclusion, and all armies belong to barbarism, A necessity for war is a confession of departed statesmanship and a triumph for the cruelest kind of crime. The peace societies have all the facts and all the argument on their side But the reign of peace will come only when there is a new kind of man. That was written in the beginning, and so it shall be till the day of judgment. comicbooks.co