Judge — March 21, 1896 — page 13: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Lawyer (a few years hence)—"' Make your mind easy. |The jary wil disagree,” Prison. er—" Sure?” Lawyer—"*| know it, Two of the members arc man and wile" New York Dispatch. “I's strange but true,” says the Manayunk Philosopher, ““that a man will spurn the best advice when it’s offered gratis and will follow the poorest when he's charged for it."—PAi/a- delphia Record, “Mr. Insite, give the class your idea of op- timist and pessimist.” ‘Yes, sir. An opti- mist is a man who is happy when he's miser- able and a pessimist is a man who is miserable when he's happy.""—Chicago Record, “* Ves,” said one theatrical manager, ‘that j artist's salary is five hundred dollars a week.” | Indeed?" replied the other. _‘* Do you mind | telling me how much she gets?"— Washington Star. “I see you have ‘Cave canem' over your gate, professor. Is there really any savage dog about the place?” ‘Of course.” "Then why don't you put the sign in English?” ‘In English, sir? A man who cannot read Latin understandingly deserves to be bitten,"—/n- dianapolis Journal, REDUCED RATES TO NEW YORK FOR THE SPORTSMEN'S EXHIBITION, MARCH 16th TO arst, a For this occasion the Baltimore and Ohio eed Yai Railroad Company will sell tickets at reduced jeer tates to New York from all points east of the Ohio river from March 12th to 21st. inclusive, and from all points on its lines west of the Ohio river from March 12th to 18th, inclusive ; good for return passage until March 2sth, inclusive. Tickets will also be sold from all stations of | connecting lines. No matter where you start from, be sure your ticket reads via the historic and picturesque Baltimore and Ohio, For full information address nearest Balti- more and Ohio ticket agent; L. S. ALLEN, A. G. P. A., Chicago, or Cartes O, Scutt, G. P, A., Baltimore. ROMEIKE yo TRY THE “BRACER.” Campbell's Extract of Tomato Will straighten you up in 10 minutes. ‘The tramp in New Jersey who timed his burg- lary to chill weather and compelled the owner ‘of the house to chase him barefooted across stubble-fields that hurt his toes, while the said ‘owner was arrayed only in a pistol and a night- Drogpisis and others. shirt, was one of the most inconsiderate of his inconsiderate tribe.— Brooklyn Eagle, fant Tate & Co.,245 broadway, New York Discovered and prepared only by 0S. CAMPBELL P RESERVE C0. {erica oY — — | SUFFERERS toczaripstsar red wha “Tt is said,” remarks an exchange, “‘that | Kremere Drapepela Rewder.frial tox free for Vvofessor Max Miiller can converse inveighteen | Samh. SOMN RIEMEA, Drones 2th Ava different languages.” Mr, Miiller must have | stepped on one of those slippery places on the | sidewalk. —Menneapolis Journal. CKLY, Send for" 00 Tnventions Wanted.”" The Things Left Unsaid Pr he things we can’t put in words—the palance—the glide—that easy glide—on he wheel that is ** hem all 365 days ahead of See that curve? -KEATING Art Catalogue, 2 two-cent stamps KEATING WHEEL CO, Holyoke, Mass FA Is a suae cone DR. WILLIAMS? INDIAN PILE OINTMENT forall Kinds of Prizs. Gives instant relief. Every box is warranted. by drug- iste.” Sent by mail on Feceipt of price, 60 Cents and 91.00 per boas WILLIAMS M'F'G CO., Props., Cleveland, 0, 95 PURE, Harmless, @ Wholesome, A Turkish Gigarrets dled Armenians from the erie ‘Turkish ‘Sand 40 cents for sample boxes, $5 forassorted brands as ed. Postpaid. Satisfaction guaranteed. ” MIHRAN ATESHIAN, 26 Tremont St., Boston, Mass. EVANS’ ALE ELECTROBOLE 22% 2 reli ory, a ei ratBor am Now York NY. AGENTS WANTED. Patented Hon. 3, KALAMAZOO WHIST | the ASO Pha: Hancap- ‘Gases dccotee of Whi tree neleigmasoo Wetnod thea | I oT fdeuters or direch from TMLNG BROS. & EVERARD, Kalamazoo, Mich. Sound and Refreshing visits the nursing mother and her child if she takes 's e ~“uliine reatest aid to nature in building up the weakened system—a flesh producer and blood vitalizer. The palatable nutriment of pure malt and hops. To be bad at all druggists’ and grocers’. Prepared by ANHEUSER-BUSCH BREWING ASSOCIATION, ST. LOUIS, U. S. A. Send for handsomely illustrated colored booklet and other reading matter. SCHERING'S GOUT? pIPERAZIN “zt: Na FING, A WATER wu cure we. gle LEHN & NS EINK, Agents, Mewite York. South African Of Color DEAFNESS ay ry ere sivat aa" a Wisore commen’ Senso e nse Ear Drums, beilliancy. ‘New sclentife invention; different fromallother devices "Thea wate, fimple, comfortable and invisibis Sar'Dramn inthe wory(-Helpewbere je, Nvwireoretring pamphlet. ‘WILSON EAR DRUM CO. Omicen { iresresauesy sew Yorke It is a food drink—the RtCOMMENOED FOR Gravel, Calculus, Lazy Liver, and all Uric cha ‘examleation’ Blt hein tack’ Bead teens for a shan JEWELRY CO., ‘22 Daansoas 67, CAleage, Hi. THE BEST BILLIARD AND POOL TABLES tn the world are manufactured by ‘The Bronswick-Balke-Collender Co, Sole Manafactarers of the NEW STEEL-PLATE BOWLING ALLEYS. Jso Wooden-bed Alleys and ail Dowling Supplies. Wickes Patent Refrigerators and Cooling Tome, Nar and Saloon Fixtures, eter cic. Weite or call for catalowuce and eat - wee} 860 BROADWAY, corner 17th Stroet (Union Square), NEW YORK.