Judge — December 7, 1895 — page 28: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE BRUTE! HE ASKED bis wife what she would like to get. * Oh, nothing,” answered she. He never yet with such good fortune met— He gave it willingly. WEARY RAGGLES ON CHRISTMAS. F SANTA CLAUS put ennything in my stockin’ it wud drop out o' de heel. When yer swipe a turkey in town yer don't hev de job o' pickin’ off de feathers. De pious blokes whut supplies de boys wid readin’= matter patronize de wrong book-store. De white Chris'mus is immense when yer kin set ‘longside a warm stove an* watch it throo a winder. Ef I hedn’t used dat dye- stuff on me whiskers when dey wuz gittin’ gray I might hev hed a fine job imperson- atin’ Santa Claus. De island may be a poor place ter spend Chris’mus, but it's better dan hevin’ HE KNEW, : Wir, (af the close of Christmas day)—"* Maw, didn't you say that Santa Claus only brought presents to good boys ?” Mote: ves, dear.” Witiie—"* Well, if Santa Claus thinks all of the fellers he brought presents for are good boys somebody has give him an awful steer.” HIS BUSINESS. Farmer Grexne —" Hain't yer got no business?” WANDERING WILLIE —"* Wy, yes ; jes’ at present I'm advocatin’ better roads.” de farmer's wife experimint on yer wid mince-pie. A man can’t be expected ter be good all de time. By comin’ ter town an’ joinin’ de salvation army in de winter 1 manage ter strike de golden mean. = city folks wud only go away an’ shut up deir houses in de winter instead o' de summer de town wud be a better place ter spend Chris'mus in. VERY NEW. Clerk —* Here's a cus- tomer asking if there’s any- thing new in Christmas liter- ature.” Book-seller—* Don't come to me with your stupid questions. Don’t you know that our stock left from last Christmas is as new as the day it came from the pub- lishers’?" DESIRE, IF Thad all I wanted, Of which I feel bereft, I must confess undaunted ‘There wouldn't be much left. comicbooks.com