Judge — September 21, 1895 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

W. J. Amwres 1 AME Gx PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITRD STATKS AND CANADA IN ADVANCR, One copy, one year. or s2 numbers - $5.00 One copy, six months, or 2 numbers - 2.50 A ‘One copy, for thirteen weeks == 1.38 = Including the Cuxistatas Juocr. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all foreign countries in the postal union, $0.00 year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupce BuILpING), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. (A THE PUBLISHERS of the New York weekly JUDGE notify the public that the ute of JUDGE im locat advertising schemes by printing and inserting advertizing pages between ite leaves it a direct violation of the publishers’ rights under the copy right law, and all copies of JUDGE are sold upon the express condition that they will not be used for such purposes. No one is authorized by the publishers to use JUDGE in this manner, and they will take prompt measures to step anybody from so using their paper. Notice is hereby given that the United States cirewit court has recently granted am injunction restraining the use of JUDGE in that two JUDGE PUBLISHING COMP 110 Fifth avenue, New York. $B NOFICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Jupce are protected by copy: in both the United States and Great Britain, Inf promptly and vigoruusiy prosecuted, THE Qu is accused of murdering her own English. HERE WON'T be so much matri- mony in Utah as heretofore, but it will be of a better kind ED ARE THEY who do not serve millionaires or run cities, for they shall handle no bombs. gement of this copyright will be EN USSIA is to try compulsory educa- tion, ‘The experiment of compul- sory patriotism is old, but feeble. ME: WHITNEY wil not let that nomination hit him in the eye if he can catch it before it gets there. RHAPS those who lost on Futu- rity will have it returned to them at some point of that far-off period. ET US HOPE that Mrs. Maybrick will get her freedom before death, because after that she won't want it MORRISON to Hill— Keep your bees to yourself, David, They sting, and this is no time for honey. ++ LET the farmers agree not to plant for one year and the world will starve,” says Peffer. Heavens! Why has nobody thought of that before? ee * drowsy." WHEN PRINCE COLONNA gets twelve thousand dollars a year for living apart from his wife and children, can it still be said that mar- riage is a failure? M® CLEVELAND is right in the declaration that marriage is a grand, sweet song; but with three babies in the house there are some re- markable variations, LARGE NUMBER of the people of Connecticut recently went through several forests in search of a wild man. We don't know what his claims are, but surgly he needn't run for president if he doesn’t want to, GAM JONES says the hand of a society woman is as cold and clammy as the tail of a dead fish. idently the society woman he has shaken hands with knew the kind of company she had accidentally en- countered MOR HANDY tells of a man to whom, apprehensive of a request for a loan, he pleaded poverty, and the man drew out a wad of money and offered to loan him a hundred dollars This is a credulous world, but Major Handy foolishly goes too far. SO VIVID. Actor—"* Well, how did the manager like your play?” AUTHOR (enthusiastically)—" Why, when I reached tne opiu scene I looked up from the manuscript and the man was actually getti ECONOMICAL INJUSTICE. IKE COUNTY, Pennsylvania, refuses to prosecute a murderer because of the expense of a trial, and perhaps of the subsequent execution. It would be just retribution if there were more cases of violence in that county; but when a murderer has to be tried many times before a result is reached the question of the cost becomes a serious matter, TOO COPIOUS INFORMATION. THE. DETECTIVES have piled too many horrors on Mr. Holmes’s head. The man will not only be acquitted, but stands a fine chance of becoming an unwinged angel. A serious fault of the detectives is the trying and hanging of criminals previous to the organization of the court and the erection of the gallows. Few persons are as sad to the reflective observation as is the man who knows too much, THE DISPUTED GARMENT. A JUDGE of Little Rock, Arkansas, says a woman has a constitutional and God-given right to wear bloomers. There is nothing in the constitution or the scriptures to prove this, and in fact in the beginning she had the privilege of wearing nothing at all; but it is a common-sense view, and as soon as the woman bas the ballot-box she will wear what she pleases as long as she can get somebody else to pay for it. THE MIX IN KENTUCKY. NRY WATTERSON, speaking of Hardin on a sound-money plat- form, says, “Our hands are tied behind our back and our voice, ad- dressing itself to deaf ears, leaves us free of responsibility.” We never did hear of such ridiculous freedom as that. With tied hands and a voice practically silent, the poor man’s freedom of re- sponsibility isn’t worth a cent. And his party, running the loud-mouthed Hardin on a platform that he despises, is worse off than he is. THE INGALLS WISDOM. F MR. INGALLS ever gets that senatorial chair back he will fasten himself into it with a chain. Eccen- tricity and cynicism in politics are quite amusing ; but the ex-senator finds them far too expensive for his pocket and his reputation, and the work of digging potatoes gets dirt under the finger- nails and thistles on the agricultural garment. Still, Mr. Ingalls isn’t quite + as absurd as the two senators from this state who resigned for the mere sake of getting re-elected. THE TALKEE HARDIE, THE LABOR of this country is in- dignant enough at Keir Hardie to put the red flag around his neck and choke him to death, If he doesn’t know any better than to class the workingmen of this country with the cut-throats who call themselves anarchists he had better go back to Eng- land and learn a few good manners and some of the rudiments of Ameri- can politics. What the workers of this country most need is to be saved from the foolishness of their foreign talkee-talkee friends. HIS HAPPY SELF-SACRIFICE. MB: CAMPBELL of Obio is the best-natured scapegoat the world has known. We honor him as a persistently falling man, and look with rapture at his repeated efforts to set himself up and try it again as if noth- ing had happened. He “always comes down stairs that way,” as the man remarked when he went with one step from the top to the bottom of the altitude; and nothing can ruffle the calm imperturbability of his classic but somewhat soiled features. But how he mus} love to be kicked. THE TENDER FREAK. AMONG THE NEW WOMEN is the woman who disappears. She tires of the monotony of life at her own home and becomes a servant in the home of others. She assists a convict, and having been discovered in it gets frightened and hides herself. She drinks by mistake some acid- uous liquid that turns her face blue, and shuts her doors against friend and foe alike. She dresses herself as a boy and runs away. She is ex- ceptional, however. The large majority of new women are never so happy as when they are most in sight. comicbooks.com