Judge — August 17, 1895 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

FORGOTTEN. POSE melancholy ember days Will make me glum and glum- mer; eZ For such.are not-remember days To her I loved last summer. THE UNBIDDEN VISITORS. -[N/OUR church, upon several occasions; dogs had strayed, thereby creating some little com- motion, and our pastor in rather a sarcastic manner requested the. congregation in the future to leave their dogs and cats at home. Now the pastor was the happy possessor of a pug dog, and this dog, several Sundays after, made his escape from home and, following his master to church, put in an appearance in the choir, thereby causing such commotion that the pastor, being in the midst of the service and all unconscious of the dog being his, took his seat until the dog was ejected.. Most unfortunately it happened that a forlorn, half-starved kitten had strayed into the body of the church and made its way slowly down the centre aisle. Just then, the pastor having resumed service and the con- gregation being on their knees, some wicked person, who has much to answer for, opened the door and let the dog in. Over the backs of several pews went the cat, the dog in full pursuit. The former, finding itself hard pressed, made for the chancel, and the pastor, reaching down, caught it under his surplice and bore it into the vestry-room, accompanied by the dog, making desperate efforts to retard his progress: by tugging at the surplice. It is needless to say that when the services were finally resumed there was a lack of that rever= ence in pulpit and church so conducive to worship. IN BROOKLYN. Mr. Brooklyn Heights—" How are you feeling this morning ?” Mr. Prospect Hill—"A\\ tired out. Was pushing the wheel this morn- ing for an hour before break- fast.” Mr. Brooklyn Heights—"\s that so? 1 didn’t know you rode.” Mr. Prospect Hill—"\ don’t, but baby does.” TOO MUCH EXPERI- ENCE. Cobbte—" | tried to make a bet the other day with that fel- low Toughney, but he told me that his business wouldn't allow him to gamble.” Stone—" What does he do?” Cosble—" He's the dealer in a faro-bank.” Going one better. “IIE LAUGHS BEST The country bumpkins have great sport with the city dude— ETC, —— il he monopolizes the society of the belle of the town, NOT LIKELY, HOWEVER. Se THAT hen is as thin as a spectre,” said Farmer Sparrowgrass to his wife. “Perhaps she is going to lay a ghost instead of an egy,” replied Mrs. Sparrowgrass. THE SHERLOCK HOLMES METHOD. Impatient suburban resident (at ten-thirty p m.)—" Here I have spent half an hour running up and down to find a letter-box. Let me see. The alderman lives at the head of the street. There must be a box near his house. There is some good of these fellows after all.” S SON IN DANGER. I hev ter keep er sharp eye on them gals er ter thet son o' mine.”* Straddling the blind and taking the pot, sy Ree “‘comicbooks.com