Judge — August 17, 1895 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A CORRECTED PROVERB. Miss Tawnson (svith a reproving wrigyle)—"* Did yo know, Mr. Hugdon, dat fammilverarrity breeds contempt ?* Mx. HvGDON (swith another amative reef) — word, Miss Tiny ; it sho'd read, * breeds content,” Fi lady, honey." (Semt-a-c-e-¢-4,) HISTORICAL BONMOTS. CoLumous, just returned from was an outing in Americ greeted in the Strand by Sir Izaak Walton, What d'ye know?" asked Sir Izaak. “Oh, nothing particularly, met your old friend Powhatan. He informed me that fishing was good this season and requested me to put Walton.” A dismal eve. chning rapidly. vis-2 Solar stock de- Grove and Nap, is, discussing prospects. Nap—"tam the founder of my own dynasty, the architect of my own fortunes, the arbiter of my own destinies.” Grove —" Nes, Nap; 1 guess that’s my trouble too !" Washington was taking a promenade to show off his new cocked hat when Benedict Arnold came up. “How do you like my new 1* Herr Heveewayte—" Good hevings, Kachel, der baby veighs more as I do ried out insensiblé, mynselluf !" stooken indentity ob de int heart nebber won faih OUR PUG IN THE HOT WEATHER. ——return to form in: the cool of the evening, hat?” asked pater patria. + “A cogged dice,” responded the gambling quartermaste1 This may explain Arnold's sudden retirement from the continental “army. Catiline and. Chauncey M, Depat-stood at the ticket-window. Cati- « line bought a return ticket “Do you go"—— } “1 go, but J return,” intercupt> * ed Catiline, Napolegn-lounged against a tree in the Luxembourg. - Carlyle and Thackeray chanced along. Carlyle paused to! enforce a.point. “1 tell you, Bill, great men are the instruments of Providence and sponsible for their actions.” ‘ap tyrned, bowed, and said, "Tomi; will you ioin me?” They were conversing amiably, Lord Lytton and Sol Goldstein. Lytton remarked, “ In the lexicon of youth there is no such word as fail.” *Leeton, you vas a fool,” ex- claimed the irate Hebrew. Leibnitz and Kepler were ats- cussing weinies and cornering the beer market, when Kepler thusly, “Gottfried, there is a fourth law which I cannot master !" What is that ?” said Leibnitz, “ My mother-in-law !” The great philosopher was car- A MISCALCULATION, EDWARD CLAYTON SAVAGE. Farater Hocake—" If that bicy- cle feller stops here fer a drink [ll fix him,” CHOLLY Sma you faw —a fweshing well-w: Farater Hoca! sonney, an’ help yerself HE GOT MORE THAN HE WANTED. aw gloss of youah we- Can T twouble Farr Hocaxe — "Have yer got enough ?* CHOLLY SMALL —"* Guegg-ll od fellah 7* Farmer Hocake —" Then git!” “Step up. comicbooks.com