Judge — April 13, 1895 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

QUITE LIKELY. ABUAH MILQUEAD of Lake township came down to Albany to push a little bill he had in the hands of the Hon Trito Catchawn. He found his representative at his hotel in a terrible state of collapse, breath- ing stertorously and marring the foot-board of the bed with his boot-heels. Silently Mr. Mil- quead stole away in sadness and, meeting the Hon. Trito Catch- awn next morning on State street, remarked, “Tcalled on you yesterday and was sorry to find you in that condition.” “Thank you for your sym- pathy,” said Trito. “Tam sub- ject to ‘em. It was a fit.” A soft smile stole over the ample countenance of the man from Lake = = 2 Z and then he said, HIGH CLASS EATING IDCTUR ETAT OCU ASTIVILG E TREAD "Speaking after the manner of tailors, it may have been a fit, but to OF THE NEW! MEETING HOUSE: me it looked as if it was a leetle tight. “Dis subjec’, ladies an’ gen'lemen, am * Hayjacks defyin’ de lightnin’."” A look of surprise, then one of joy, came into the legislator’s face, Deacon Johnsing am kindly representin’ Hayjacks an’ Brudder Obadiah Howler and together they smiled so loudly that it shook a trolley off the wire. am attendin’ toe ue realistic effec’ ob de lightuin’.” . APPLYING HIS INSTRUC- TION. +s] NOTICE that the insurgen- tlemen of Cuba have "— “The what, Johnny? “The insurgentlemen.” “You mean the insurgents, don’t you?" “Yes; but you have often told. me not to say gents.” i THE LONELYWOOD HOSE COMPANY. Citily "1 see you wear a badge of the Lonelywood hose company. Isn't it pretty tough to have to respond to an alarm ona cold, rainy night, when you've work- ed hard in the city all day? Commuter (lightly) —* Pooh, pooh, man! Why, you can stay at home and pay a dollar fine. That's what everybody does except the man whose house is afire." AN INSULT AVENGED. REFLECTIONS ON SPRING. OWED to spring—The boil Hard lines—The spring poem. ‘The amateur gardener gets in many a sly dig. April fools—Those who get married at Easter. The spring-mad man—The fellow who moves to a house in the suburbs. To be the first to ride in an open horse-car is often followed by a ride in a hearse. The goat has all seasons for his own, but it is in the spring that we see the most signs of him. It is better to get a few dollars on your overceut from your uncle than to keep it yourself and get moths on it. The most common form of spring madness attacks the married man and manifests itself when he receives the bill for his wife's new bonnet. J. J. O'CONNELL. A JUSTIFIABLE DISTURBANCE. te] HEAR there was a row this morning at Mixton’s panentire = Ns oN Z Soe ss “So there was. “ What was the matter?” SEEKING INFORMATION, Newcomrr—"* Say, I don’t like to show my ignorance, but am not above taking a little “The new dude clerk got the orders mixed and sent advice Is it best to plant your eggs in a hill or sow them in a row? Pat McGi c Ac 3 : Fase —" What in tarnation thunder do you expect to raise?” ‘at McGinness a package of cigarettes with a picture of Newcomex—" Spring chickens ” Victoria inscribed * Our beloved queen.’ comicbooks.com