Judge — March 16, 1895 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JONES AND THE SNOWBALL. A RECOLLECTION OF BOYHOOD'S MAPPY DAYS. EDUCATIONAL IN- CONSISTENCY. SS YWVHAT do you think of this kindergarten system of teaching?” “I have two boys at- tending their school, learning to work on card-board full of small holes and make thumb- Papers and pictures on the slate. Iam paying six dollars a quarter for them to learn what I used to get licked in school for doing. Sure as you live.” ONE OF THE. FINEST. Cobwigger —"Is your husband an agitator?" Mrs, Gleason—* Phut?” Cobwigger —"1 mean does he work for the green flag?” Mrs. Gleason—" No; he wur-rks fur th’ graneback.”” BOTH LUCKY. Mr.- FarnontH — * Gee-whi in luck ter'find sich a good umbrella.’ AN A. D. 1995 REJECTION. Mr. Youxcman (coldly) —"“Arise, Mrs. Grasswidow ! be a brother to you. Papa has learned that your former husband secured a divorce from you on grounds of non-support."” T can only SUBMERGED NATIVE—"* Thanks, old PAT’S STRATAGEM. man, OE FALE jist ex fish ex a daisy, Wid th’ shamrocks so grane in me hat, An’ Oi till ye it wun't be so aisy Ez they're thinkin’ to lay me out flat. There's Casey, be jabers! Oi'll hoax ‘im— Bad luck t’ th’ dirthy ould shnake! His hid will be bruk kin Oi coax ‘im T’ cum wid me down ¢’ th’ wake, JAMS J. O'CONNELL. SCRIPTURAL HISTORY. Sunday school superintendent— "Now who was it that was despoiled by his brethren of his raiment and aft- erward became the king’s most trusted adviser?” Johnny (who reads the papers)— “Li Hung Chang.” KEPT THE SERPENT OUT. Cora— Where could St. Patrick have done more good than in Ireland ?” Merrétt—"In the garden of Eden.” adapted for a Greek tragedy. 6, With a sombrero, here you have Alkali Ike, adventures of modern drama. VARIOUS USES OF A WIG IN THE BARNSTORMER DRAMATIC COMPANY. 3. Yes, it's a Voltaire wig in the first place. 2. But it also comes in handy with a pin or two for Count Spaghetti. 3. Then it’s easily 4. And, upside-down, splendid for Inclestein. 5, Used with_great 7. And we always use it for Master William Tell, ‘success in the great arctic melodrama, 8. It also makes a swagger tippet for the comicbooks.com