Judge — January 26, 1895 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

Mia W. J. Anceut. Bexxwano Gian 1. M. Gencons, Editor. PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITRD SYATRS AND CANADA IN ADVANCE, One copy, one year. or 52 numbers - $5 00 One copy, six months, or 26 numbers - 2.50 One copy’ for thirteen weeks = = 1.25 Incliding the Cuxiststas Joocr. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS~ To all foreign countries in the postal union, $0.00 a year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (Jupce BuiLptNc), Corner Fifth Avenue and Sixteenth Street, New York. tar THE SHERS of the New Vork weekly JUDGE notify the public that the wie of JUDGE in local advertising schemes by printing and inserting advertising faces Letween its leaves it a direct violation of the publishers’ rights under the copy- right law. No one is authorized by the publishers to use JUDGE in this manner, and they will take prompt measures to stop anybody from 10 using their paper. JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY, 10 Fifth avenue, New York. $27 NoTIC eight in both E TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Jupce are protected by copy- United States and Great Britain, Infringement of this copyright will be BLOOMER got over there she protested w against the prevailing styles of wings and halo. REAT BRITAIN has consented tolet Nicaragua alone. This is al- most as kind as it is prudent and wise. M&S: u on Kansas, has turned her back and is now looking at it over her shoulder to see the con sequent conflagration. ME: PLATT is sensitive. We dare say he left Parkhurst’s church because he was charged with bossing the prayer-meetings. THE POLICE OFFICIALS of this city did some excellent work at the beginning of this year. We never saw a nicer lot of resignations. SeMEBODY discusses a cure for train-robberies, The managers of the New York Central think the best cure is the prohibition of stop-over tickets. JOHN W. FOS’ R, acting for Chi- na, cannot say, with Grant, “1 Il have peace if I have to fight for but he might give that suggestion to the people he represents. rie oa LAND AND HILL re marked simultaneously as. they met for dining purposes, “1 feel like 1 i had found a long-lost brother"; and Fy there wasn't a dry eye in the house. A CRUEL yen v7" sez now thot me woife will git well.” ADY SC T she stands shoulder to shoulder with the working-women, and there appears to be no doubt as to the warmth of her part of the combination, HREE WOMEN serving as members of the Colorado legislature keep their hats off while on duty; but the world is looking at them and they must keep on their various wraps and their best behavior. RS. L_E. CASTLE of lowa, who is serving as justice of the peace, was elected to that position because the ticket had her initials instead of those of her husband. That gentleman must find it rather odd to re- flect that his Castle 's in the air from two wholly different points of view. OSEBERY recommended no new peerages to the queen among the honors of the new year. ‘This will make the approaching end of the upper house less poignant, because there won't be so many hearts to break. The premier is cruel that he may be kind, and sees no good in adding sorrow 19 the existing hereditary idiocy. DISAPPUIN Pat—"* Yez know thot wake Oi tould yez Oi wor goin’ t invoite Vis. —"" Well, it graves me heart t' disapp'int yez, but th’ docthor LAW. REPRIEVE by the governor of New Jersey saved the life of a mur- derer sentenced to be hanged. Now the murderer's lawyer argues that the reprieve was illegal, that therefore the murderer is legally dead, and that he must be released. The man did the murdering, but of course the law cannot stop to think of a little thing like that. FAIR PLAY FOR WITNESSES. LAWYER has been accused of bullying a woman on the witness- stand, This is a curiosity of the new year. Heretofore lawyers have been permitted to insult as well as bully women witnesses, and the court and the outside world have looked upon it as a harmless pleasantry. Let that kind of meanness be eliminated from court trials and the loafers of the court-rooms will be relieved of half their fun. A PAIR OF HIM. R. TWO-STICKS, the Indian who was hanged, was worse than wasted. What an actor he might have been! His speeches of protest and appeal, and finally of resignation, in the latter of which he mentioned death as a good thing, were quite as fine as the Indian classics of the school-books. There are several theatrical companies that need him, and will yearn to see his ghost walk every week. THE EXTREME OF PUN- ISHMENT. JAPAN feels insulted because China, “who should fall on her knees,” wants peace without humiliation. This dislike of humiliation is quite natural. All men and all nations have it; and chivalrous conquerors drop the demand for it as soon as they can. It is diffi- cult, However, to see how China can further humiliate herself. Her head being broken, must she take another fall and break her already stretched and suffering neck? THE COURTESIES OF EXECUTION. ovr NEW GOVERNOR is excess- ively polite, “Will it be quite convenient for you,” he says to certain office-holders, “to hand in your resig- nation at once?” “Oblige me,” says the sheriff, “by allowing me to tie a knot with this little rope under your left ear;" and the chief officiator at the guillotine remarks kindly, “Get under the knife, my friend, and I'll give you the cleanest, closest shave you ever had in your life.” And the gentlemen thus addressed never forget the excel lent courtesy of their taking off. LAW-MAKERS AS LAW- BREAKERS. ANEW CODE of morals, giving men credit for being theoretically good and overlooking their practical experience, would suit the most of us. Mr. Depew says the most inconsistent and persistent beggars of passes were some of the members of the late constitutional convention, who abol- ished passes. They not only wanted passes against the law of their own enactment, but ‘they wanted them for a-year after the situation which evoked them had expired. Mr. Depew says this is gall. look upon it as the lapse of some inconvenient memory. MENT. We prefer to A STATE STRUCTURE, OVERNOR MORTON: scems to think the “new” capitol at Albany will eventually be completed. We know not whether to call this gullibility or faith in human nature, but he really advises ways and means with that end in view. There was once a man who proposed a bridge across the Atlantic ocean, and there are men in France who want to raise more money for the Panama canal. It may be possible to find the north pole, and some years hence there may be additional stories to the peaks of the Andes, The skies must be swept of their cobwebs, and there is an urgent need of new stars there. But the “new.” capitol at Albany will be uncompleted as long as the world stands, and finally come to judgment as a maimed, infirm, imperfect, colossal blotch. comicbooks.com