Judge — October 20, 1894 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A NEW IDEA. S¢MISTAH SCADDS. 1 was ober to ole Mistis Gawsip’s house, an’ 1 ob- sarved dat she allus keeps her clock an hour ahead ob time. How yo" gwine ac- count faw dat? “Tdunno, Mistah Chad- bourne, widout dat's de way she come to know ebervt ing dat transpiah in de village befo’ it-happen.” THAT WOULD MAKE THEM UNHAPPY. Cumso —" Senator Peffer and other populists make a great fuss about 7 taxes, but what would they have done if they had lived in Russia in the time of Peter the great ?” Cawhker—" What about Peter?” Cumnso —" Peter the great imposed a tax on whiskers.” A RENEGADE. D FoLgy—'Say, Limpty, dat Welcome Walker a fren’ of ours.” AMPLY GIGGINS (with feeble interest) —"* Why 's dat?” Fraven Founy (conteniptuously) —"* Why, 1 seed him readin’ de Christian at Work.” KEEPING UP WITH HER. + +GAY, brother, why have you got your cards engraved *Mr, Jym Hawkins’ ?” “To keep up to your gait, sister. Yours are engraved * Miss Carolyn Hawkins." IN THE ART-GALLERY. Mr. Flowerie (the popular connoisseur, explaining things to some Chicago friends) —" It is the soul of the artist that gives expression to his picture, that warms with life the colors on the canvas, that transmutes the inani- mate minerals of his pigment into vital spirit and illumi- nates the whole with the psychic spark of genius. Observe that Corot—how rich it is in this soulful effect.”” Chorus (of Chicago friends)—“Ab, but isn’t it a dandy?" ALL OVER BETWEEN THEM. ROBBED. He —“Oh, yes; when I was in England I was en- Miss BLack —* How pretty your daughter looks to-night, I wonder where she got all her ee eibet Baers good looks 7 thusiastically received in court circles. Mrs, Wie —"* She must have taken them from her mother.” She (nippy) —‘* What was the charge against you?” Miss Brac h, yes; too bad.” THE WAY OF THE WORLD. Clara —“\ wonder why every one is talking about this book ?* Mande— Probably because it is unfit to talk about.” au THE DIPLOMATIC WIFE AND TIE FOOLISH HUSBAND, Tue wire— "1 really am ashamed of you. There's young Strutter, crows every morning at four o'clock, before you're awake.” > ‘THe, HusHaND —"" What do you wish, love 7" THe FARMER (next zoced\—"* This rooster must THe wivow (next day) —“* Why, really, Mr. ‘THe wirk — "Why, show yourself to be a be crazy. He wakes me up every morning an hour Strutter — er — this proposal is so sudden — but — rooster among roosters. Crow every morning at before my time. I'll get rid of the idiot.” anything to please you, Mr. Strutter-—hem!—I am three o'clock.” THR HUSBAND — "Anything to please you, dear.” yours," comicbooks.com