Judge — October 13, 1894 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THOSE CABLE-CARS AGAIN, No, this man is not crazy ;, but he had been dodging cable-cars all day and thought’ this was one, ANCIENT INSECTS. SO THE. seventeen year locusts were known to the ancients.” “TL wasn’t aware of that.”” “Oh, yes. You know the Lat- ins had an expression, ‘ Tempus fugit.” "Certainly. That means‘ Time flies." “Well, what are time-flies if seventeen-year locusts are not?” WHERE HE MADE HIS MISTAKE. Visitor—“Aren't you sorry you committed bigamy?” Convict Well, yes; 1 ain't absolutely gleeful about it.” Visitor —"\t you were out to- morrow would you adopt the same course? Convict —* No, indeed. time I'd get a better lawyer.” He is. MALIGNED. H1ram—"' Holy powers, deacon ! yer ain't tryin’ ter be a dude, be yer?" Deacox—" Nothin’ of ther sort. ‘These be some duds ther boarders left an’ it seemed a shame ter let ‘em lie idle; thet’s all.” A SPINSTER’S DARING STROKE. HE MOVED nearer and nearer to her. She expected this; she had been expecting it for more than thirty years. She did not stir, Only six inches of sofa separated them. Presently there was a spasmodic movement of his arms, as if he would— But he didn’t. The sight of a third person sitting in the corner opposite checked him up. It was the crisis of her life. Not a moment was to be lost. Leaning toward him she whispered with tragic intensity, “Don't mind mamma, Mr. Mawley; she’s stone blind.” Two minutes later her hair looked as if a cyclone had been toying with it. TO WHAT BASE USES. Mrs. Booklore—*You have a great treasure in this old volume of Shake- speare, Mrs. Thrifty. Mrs. Thrifty—" Ob, my, yes! invaluable for pressing my laces.” Mr. Thrifty prizes it no end and I find it 4 THE PARK SLEEPERS’ QUARREL. IN FOR IT. * What's the matter with Clerkley? He looks worried.” He's proposed to ten girls so far this season and been WAN ran ‘accepted by them all ‘CLupber—" That's noth- ing.” Homer —"* Nothing, eh? He's just got news that his rich uncle has died and left him a cool million.” REPARTEE. ¢¢] THINK Ill have to discharge you,” said the ship to the cargo. “You wouldn't say so if you weren't loaded,” the cargo responded, and was immediately docked. comicbooks.com