Judge — August 11, 1894 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

DANGEROUS GROUND. Aumtess Wittr— Well, ef dis don’t beat me! De lady tol’ me ter go ter dis number an’ her husban’ ud do suthin’ fer me; but de trubble is I don’t know wedder dat is her husban’s tony name er de bizniz he fol- lers."* A QUICK VENGEANCE, 2 WAS keeping the baby on a warm June evening while the mother took a little rest and airing. He played with it, rolled over the floor with it, walked with it, talked to it, danced with it, rode it on one knee then on the other, shook it and patted it with various degrees of intensity. Alll the while the perspiration poured out of his face and bald head, which every other minute he mopped off to the modulations of the baby’s larynx. The mother, returning, hearing the combination of noises, quickly en- tered and sail, “One would think you had lost your senses.” He (mopping his face and head) — “TL believe Phave. I think in the last half-hour a large portion of my brains has oozed out and been wiped into kerchief.” “1 should judge the whole of them were in it.” A long silence followed. She (relemtingly)—" 1 ask your opinion.” (Noting tention.) “Did you hear m “Did you speak?” anted to ina He. “cop. She—" Yes, would opinion “— He: that of my brains?” She —*Your brains, of course.” He— Interview them.” (Handing her his handkerchief.) WILLIAM ARCHIRALD S°CLRAN. JUDGMENTS. N 0.7 lives to be forty. ‘There's many a slip twixt the cup and. the Of all virtues in wo- man serenity is the most unusual, Love makes the world go round,” and hard sense makes it go square. Other people's. way hev tew s y? Mx. SWAILS (teith a str dollers, an’ he'll git it this younker is gittin’ ekernomerkal at last, Jest look et his photy he's sent. Hain't hed his ha'r cut fer ‘bout four months.” DRAMATIS PERSONAI—THE STRAW HAT, TH to have your RUE woman ever THE DUDE AND THE DOG, WITH TI JUDGE I said I ey ly opini FOOT-BALL GROWTIL SAVED HIM, VAILS (interestedl)—"* What dew our dear boy at college ley" W ime; fer sa ferildy, a I, he wants ernuther fifty I dew think ther NKIND ASSISTA MAN PROPOSEs, Ere. When Jones asked his friend to photograph him just as he was proposing to Miss Smith, so that he would have a pleasant souvenir of the happiest moment of his life, Jones did not know that Miss Smith was going to refuse his offer. is “ your own way" if you have only a mind to make it so. Many a man who “doesn’t know enough to go in when it rains” still knows enough to raise his friend's um- brella. While analyzing and criticising your neighbor's character it might be well to find out what he thinks about yours. MADELEINE OnvIS. THE BOY’S VIEW OF IT. FOR a month he's worn breeches and ints, While his head has been shorn of each curl, Now he says of his photo in skirts, “That is me when I once was a girl.” APPLIED LETTERS. s6P)O YOU ever have to do any writing in your I course at college?” ature “Yes; every week. I have agreat task for next week. “What is that? “TL have to write ‘Paradise Lost * as Amelie Rives would have done it.” q Mayer E OF THE WIND. comicbooks.com