Judge, 1894-05-12 · page 4 of 16
Judge — May 12, 1894 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple short satirical comics and jokes typical of early 20th-century American humor: **"All the Difference in the World"** mocks class snobbery: an aristocratic mother forbids her daughter from associating with a shopkeeper's daughter (Miss Billings) to maintain "social position," yet permits friendship with Miss Wilbur—whose father owns the *same kind of store*. The joke exposes arbitrary social prejudice based on superficial distinctions. **"A Porcine Relation"** presents ethnic humor featuring German-accented characters discussing a father-in-law's accident, with dark comedy about lost insurance money. **Other brief jokes** satirize vanity ("Waiting to Start"), pretentiousness (the artist painting 32 Dead Sea pictures), romantic clichés (carrying one's cane as a love sign), and social climbing (an English nobleman prospecting for rich American heiresses). The page is predominantly humor rather than political commentary, reflecting Judge's general satirical approach to everyday American life and manners.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
a A PORCINE RELATION Hockitenier —" Dot vasa narrow escape your fader-in-law had in dot run- shust barely safed his life.” evY—"" Yes; und shust barely lost me twendy dousand tollars accident in- surance on his life. My fader-i a hog, und only tinks of himseluf."* A HOPEFUL OUTLOOK. HE costs of drugs and medicines Are having such a fall, Cut-prices will bring sicknesses Within the reach of all. WAITING TO START. Impatient husband —*" Will you ever come away from that looking- glass, Clara?” Wife (pleasantly) —* You forget. Algy, that art is long.” Husband (sharply) —" madam, that time is fleeting.” member, NOT MUCH LIFE THERE. Friend —"\ suppose that you al- ways try to throw as much life in your pictures as you can.” Artist —" Not always. I've painted thirty-two pictures of the Dead sea in my time.” _, BURGLAR Jim —"* Hist! some one approaches. will conceal myself in this closet.” JUDGE ALL THE DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD. +4] T WOULD be much better, my dear,” said the aris- tocratic mother with decision, “if you had less to do with that Miss Billings.” “Why, mamma? Isn't she a nice girl?” “[ know nothing against her personally,” replied the mother, “but it is just as well not to be identified too closely with a shop-keeper’s daughter. We cannot be too careful in such matters, Mamie, if we are to maintain our social position.” “But you don’t object to my associating with Miss Wilbur.” “That is a very different matter.” “Her father keeps the same kind of a store.” “Not at all, Mamie; not at all. Mr. Wilbur has no retail department, while Mr. Billings has. You should think of these things yourself, and not leave it all to me.” A SUFFICIENT REASON, Mr. Dolley— Miss Flypp, why do you suppose it is that there is no marrying nor giving in marriage in heaven?” Miss Flypp (promptly)— No men there.” A SURE SIGN. Carrie —* How dreadfully in love he must be !" What makes you think so?” “Why, just see how he is carrying his cane ! THE BURGLAR'S BLUNDER. PROSPECTOR. What is he? He is a prospector. A prospector? Ie doesn’t look like one. Bat he is though. An English noble- man prospecting for a rich American heiress. WISE WOMAN. HE bric-a-Drac forth from the hall She quickly moved away When her dear husband said he joined “ Another club that day, THE COW-BOY VESTRY. She—"So Dr. his duty to accept a c out in Arizona, did he? He—"Ves, and his congregatior has now i She —" For what? He—" Oh, he prayed for rain and didn’t get it.” A SUITABLE MATCH. ¢ was a widow lady.” Shadi Yes, and she married a widower gentleman.” rdly thought it to that church Bur the closet proved to be a dumb-waiter, as he discovered. comicbooks.com