Judge — April 28, 1894 — page 12: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

A HOME SCENE. Mrs. Lease (looking up from her newspaper) —“ William, does it not make your blood boil to read of these combinations of cap- ital against "— Her husband —" One moment, my dear; the baby is awake again. ing syrup.” Mrs. Lease (as he leaves the room) —“ Bother the baby! I can’t have peace to think in this house. It is enough to drive a woman to drink.” Mr, Lease (who has returned after pacifying the baby) —“ My dear, I don’t think camphorated oil is good to rub on his chest ; it opens the pores and "— Mrs, Lease (impatiently) —“All right, do as you please. As I was saying, William, the down-trodden farmer cannot get bread and bacon to eat, while” Mr. Lease (excitedly) —*Ah, now | remember it! I put the bacon in the pot just after you left for the convention, and I never thought of it again till this moment. How could I be so stupid ?" Mrs, Lease (after his return from the kitchen)— William, I fear you cannot raise your mind above sordid things. It is of no use. to talk to you of the great problems which are now engaging the human intellect. When I start to tell you about capitalistic domination you give your thoughts to the baby; and when I try to explain the causes of the agricultural depression you cannot take your mind off your humdrum household duties.” Mr. Lease (humbly) —"* Don't be hard on me, my dear. After your office hours you can spend your even- ings in improving your mind; while my work is never done. I was up with the baby nearly all last night. To- day I couldn't get the kettle to boil and I have a heap of sewing ahead of me to-night.” Mrs. Lease—" Well, perhaps there are excuses for you Goon with your sewing while I finish this article.” A WKKCK ON THE TRACK, HIS DESIGNATION. JNN has proposed to Miss Then be really is a pop Gunn, “MR G sugar ag’ IN THE SPRING OF LOVE. “ Lucy!" "Theodore !* * Let us fly + Ves, darling ; let us fly 1° 1 must give him some more sooth-~ horse had no "Rast . _ Geo'ge. Wa: Pray Now, I'll do what Uncle Sam ought to do wif dem—I'll make yo" seat too warm fo’ yo’ !” next. JUDGE 2 Am Aad IN THE FASHION. CHoLLy ow to win.” Curarrix— The prince of Wales lost ten thousand pounds on the races last season.” JUDGMENTS. get square. or of inherited taint. not expect too much. his world wondering. Tt is Poor man A pipe smells A house that is di TROUBLE. ‘ton, yo' bin foolin’ wif dat k yo" is one ob dem sugab-trust senators A BRIGHT OLD SAILOR. N OLD sailor rowing two young ladies on a | which there have been many and various disputes, five feet, others ninety feet, while others claim there is no bottom. lake hadn't no bottom the water would all have run ou OBJECT-LESSON ON THE CHAIR. Teacher (having directed the attention of the cla parts of a chair)—“ Of what use is the seat in a cl Rright little girl (who knows it all) —“ I know. Teacher — You may tell the class. Bright little girl —" To keep people from flopping on the flocr.” “How the deuce could you bet on Tamesteed? You knew that hat was just the reason I bet on him. Read this, deah boy IFE is too shot to The king can do no wrong without everybody imism is an evi- dence of a sour stomach All things come to the way of him who does He who has schooled himself to silence has set It can never be that everybody else is wrong and you alone are right. tiable to see a “gauged” wrong for a small income. domesticity; a cigar of clubs; a cigarette of vice. ed against itself cannot stand outside interference. Aman who really loves horses and dogs loves women and children ¢ about the depth of Young lady—" Captain, how deep is this lake? Some say eighty- Captain —" Wa-al, 1 don’t jest know; but I calkerlate if this ‘ere to the various Mr. Shopme | or uns | moind, | Life, Mrs. dren gums, 3 | rhoea, ACo some b thus sa Whe time a come 0 Asa Cook's Million The office « only si | unbelic The and ac Baltim ing-gu Dor gestion don't « food g one of } until ¢ with w sale b Deane comicbooks.com