Judge, 1894-04-14 · page 4 of 16
Judge — April 14, 1894 — page 4: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical cartoons and humorous stories typical of Judge magazine's social comedy: **"Muddled Philosophy"**: A servant named François confuses proverbs, mixing their meanings comically ("A rolling stone is worth two in the bush" becomes nonsensical). The satire mocks both the servant's inability to think logically and, implicitly, the arbitrary nature of proverbs themselves. **"In the Park"**: Street urchins discuss a woman covering her eyes with a towel—she's sizing up a man brought in "on charges." The crude humor suggests she'd only let him go if handsome, otherwise demand execution. **"Identification Wanted"** and **"An Insult Avenged"**: Brief visual gags about confrontations and honor—a man demands clarification of insults before retaliating violently. **"First Rule of Business"**: A boy tells a visiting clergyman he skips grace before meals, following his father's advice never to pay in advance—equating prayer with transaction. The overall tone reflects period working-class and servant humor common in early-20th-century American satire.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
230 JUDGE MUDDLED PHI- LOSOPHY. . FRANGOIS is some- thing of a philosopher, but he possesses the fac- ulty of mixing things. His brain appears to be so constructed that two ideas cannot enter it without mingling one with the other, like the components of the cocktail he brings me in the morning. This worries him so that he pipes aie) ora tos" Mamas Is there any such things as thinks. You may not be- Motuax—"* Certainly not, child, What a foolish lieve this. You who have question !” only known valets from their grave and placid exteriors have the idea that they never think. This is a mistake. It does not necessarily follow that because a man wears an austere and solemn face he is = an idiot. Look at our IN THE PARK. — amy —"* Who's dat a image uv 7” = But to return to Janry—" Woreabe cet de towel over her eyes fer?” Frances, Iwas only Patsy—'' So she can't size up de bloke dat's been run in; if hewuz this morning, while = good-lookin’ she'd let ‘im go, an’ if he wuz homely she'd electercute im.” preparing to shave me, Bossy—"' Then, mamma, who is the strange lady who that he said, comes to a fellow's bedroom at midnight all dressed in “ Misseur, what you call ze—ze proverbs. I understand it not, It seem to mean some- Syur wih black Balt and piercing eyes, and Blood al thing, but I cannot tell. I rid in ze book, ‘A rolling stone eez wort’ two in ze boosh.’ Also, and says hoarsely — “Eet ees a long lane zat knows hees fazaire.’ Parbleu! Wat can it mean? Zen I rid, ‘Eet ees better to be poor zan honest.’ I cannot tell. I know zat I am honest, aussi poor—vare poor; mais, ze proverbs say eet ees better to be poor zan honest.” I explained as well as I could that he had probably got two proverbs mixed up, but it was no use. He had got them percolated into his brain in that way and there was no such thing as straightening them out. He was silent and grave for some moments and then resumed, “But, misseur, I rid, aussi, zat ‘A wiistling girl and ze crowing hen will nevair gazzaire ze moss.’ Pourquoi? Eez ze moss scare of ze wistle and ze © ——>" The continuation of this fascinating story will ale : be found in our next issue’ 2” crow? Mais, w'y should ze girl and ze hen wish to gazzaire ze moss? Zen I rid zat ‘A light heart and ze thin breeches go always togezzaire.’ Mon Dieu! I have known men wiz ze light heart—Jean ze coach- man have ze light heart; mais, he wear it not in hees pantalon.” And the poor fellow frowned darkly and proceeded to take his revenge out of my face with a very wiry razor. MAROLD PAYNE. FIRST RULE OF BUSINESS. Johnnie (to visiting clergyman) —*Not much I don’t say grace before I eat. Time enough to say ‘thank you’ when you've gta thins. Pa always told me never to pay in advance.” IDENTIFICATION WANTED, AN INSULT AVENGED. * Pfwhat d’ yez take me far?" Fer yoost vat you are,” arr “Take that, yez insulting brute t” comicbooks.com