Judge — January 13, 1894 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

W. J. Amur. Brewnaro Gritam, LM. Gurcony, Editor, TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. ONITED STATES AND CANADA I¥ ADVANCE. One copy, one year, or s2 numbers - $5.00 One copy, six months, or 26 number One copy, fors) weeks == Tnclading the Cruasrmas Jones. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—To all for. digm countries tm the postal union, “year. THE JUDOE PUBLISHING COMPANY (JupcE But.nine) Cor, Fifth Ave, and 16th Street, New York. Notice to Subscribers. $87 The number following your name on the address-label indicates the number of paper with which your subscription expires, It will be well for our subscribers to renew about two weeks before expiration, in order to insure a continuous service of the paper. THE FLAG doesn’t need three new stars, but the Democrats think the senate needs senators from Arizona, New Mexico and Utah. KENTUCKY has six women school-commissioners, and the oldest scholars of their bailiwicks are learning with great rapidity. THE JUDGE wants it understood that General Felix Agnus of the Baltimore American is its candidate for vice-president, on any ticket, now or hereafter, world without end. . THE RRESIDENT is so absent- mirfled that he frequently stumbles over the congress and then turns around to kick the ob- struction. oe THE BEST WAY to get rid of a bad law is not to enforce it. Wiseacres have said differently, but they were never called upon to suf- fer from it. oe HE ELECTION of a Democrat as mayor of Chicago is very good evidence that the wants of the | unemployed in that city have been temporarily relieved. R. INGALLS is much thinner than formerly; so we suppose nobody can find him until he inti- mates in a loud voice that he is HOPE ON, HOPE EVER. HE DEMOCRATS of this country must not be impatient. There are not many mugwumps, and when they are all supplied with federal positions there may be a chance for the party to which Mr. Cleveland says he belongs, We feel authorized to say that Mr. Greshars has that opinion himself. REST FOR THE WEARY. EACE WILL COME to the business of the country when the Wilson bill becomes a law. Anything will be better than the present uncer- tainty; and yet the peace will be that of the graveyard to thousands of industries which have kept hundreds of thousands of workers alive and out of the poor-house, But that will be a change, and the change was voted for. THE NEW CRAZE. WO MEN have been shot by as many women for subjecting the latter to hypnotic influence... It appears, therefore, that hypnotism is of not the slightest use for purposes of defense, and fails to act in the more crit- ical cases. We should think that would be evidence calculated to bring such murdi vomen to the rope; and again there may be women who imaging hi m when they merely have hysterics. peer _<-A.GREAT MYSTERY. (7 EGATHER from Mr. Croker's letter that he is so pure and inno- cent that it Worries him. He is certainly not guilty of anything in Connection with the Hawaii muddle; and when he thinks of his honestly- gotten wealth and how tie got it he is so puzzled that he scratches his ear and muses for a long time. It is odd how several million dollars can insert themselves in one’s pocket in 4, a few years, and one not know any- thing about it. It shows how easily the sharpest and honestest of us may be imposed upon. IN THE NAME OF CHARITY. SEVERAL SOCIETY LADIES of Brooklyn appeared in public as colored minstrels. They did it for charity, in whose name even greater crimes have been commit- ted. Indeed a number of rural church-charity organizations have recently shocked themselves by looking at short-skirted women in too suggestive dances, and the re- sult has been such a breaking up of harmony as well as propriety that they can never give a lift to charity again, Perhaps this has (oe Worthy waiting to be searched for. GETTING OFF CHEAPLY, Eprtor (as supposed dynamite crank enters his sanctum)—" Wold on, there! It’s all right. You want a check for five thousand dollars. I'll give it to you immediately. Lyric rozr—" Well—hem !—this poem entitled * Little Maggie's Christ- mas'—er—you may have it at that price, sir. Thank you.” eee HE TERM “‘snowed’ under” is singularly weak in the case of gone far enough. There was re- cently a society circus in this town, and it might be well for these char- ity persons to compromise on some Judge Maynard, One hundred and one thousand! It must have been a syndicate of avalanches. W MUST give the bomb-thrower Vaillant credit for one good deed. when he wants to blow it again. He blew his own nos¢ off, and must borrow some other person's THE REPORT that several of New York's millionaires would go to Chicago to live was obviously untrue. Sometimes men are rich with the purpose in view of enjoying life. T IS NOT true, as the Rochester Herald says, that the Republicans of the legislature want to put Roswell Flower in a hole. What they want, good, generous souls! is to pull him out of one. CUSTOM ALLOWS women to act as pall-bearers in Tacoma, Wash- ington. . They are certainly indispensable in cases of birth and mar- riage, and it naturally follows that they have rights in connection with the close of existence. HE JUDGE'S COMPLIMENTS to Congressman Haines of the Rens- selaer district, a Democrat of Democrats, who is doing his utmost to defeat the miserable fraud called the Wilson bill. He is the only kind of Democrat this country cannot get along without. : little thing like that. THAT OTHER MUGWUMP. WAYNE MacVEAGH will ably represent this country in Italy, pro- vided he doesn’t discover at some critical period that the country is as intolerably bad as are its two great parties, or as Van Alen always thought it. For he is a very uncertain man. Having held office half his life; he turned upon the party that honored him, and it is sometimes a mugwump idea that treachery to a country is as admirable as treachery to friends and otganizations. Probably Mr. MacVeagh has wept over the hopelessly horrible condition of the United States as often as has the Evening Post, and his disgust may in time become so serious that he will throw up his position and scorn his salary. LOVE’S LABOR LOST. AND told the provisional and the ex-governments of Hawaii what he expected them to do, and as they didn’t do it his arduous labor was in vain. He would not use force in any event, because he couldn't, and therefore his programme was merely advisory and of no possible effect. The consequent muddle shows that Mr. Cleveland is real kind, and so given to respect for strict justice that he would like to die for it. But with all his solicitude the matter goes to congress. where it origi- nally belonged; and it may be hoped that something may be done whereby the people of the islands may be obliged to attend to their own business, at the same time that we are permitted to attend to ours. comicbooks.com {