Judge, 1893-12-02 · page 5 of 16
Judge — December 2, 1893 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains multiple satirical pieces typical of late-19th/early-20th-century American humor: **"Deacon Randolph's Philosophy"** features racist dialect humor common to the era, depicting an older Black character dispensing folk wisdom to a younger one about health and morality. The satire appears directed at patent medicines and hypochondria rather than at the characters themselves, though the execution relies on offensive stereotypes. **"The Only One"** jokes about football being the only "ball" some men attend—satirizing male indifference to social events. **"Strictly American"** presents a brief exchange about a count and "foot-ball," likely mocking foreign visitors' confusion about American customs. **"Power of the Pencil"** credits editorial cartoonists with influencing Senate votes during the silver-repeal debate (likely 1893), celebrating cartooning's political impact. The remaining sections are brief one-liners on various topics—women voters, Christian hypocrisy regarding Sunday newspapers, theft, and toothaches—typical Judge filler content mixing social commentary with puns.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
DEACON RANDOLPH’S PHILOSOPHY. 66 \A/HAD dat I seen yo' tak- Ww in’ in a spoon befo’ breakfas'?" inquired Randolph the other morning. “Oh, I had sum bad symp- tons lately, an’ dat’s medicine T’se takin’,” replied the heir-ap- parent. “Yo" vink yo" got bad symptons, eh?” said the deacon. ““Whad do a young buck niggah like yo’ call symptons, anyway ? P'r'aps when yo’ gits up in de mornin’ yo’ feel as ef yo" jes’ got out ob bed, ch! P'r'aps when yo’ drink a quart ob gin yo’ feel jes’ as ef yo’ got sumfin’ on yo" stummick! Do yo" sometimes feel languid an’ tired widout cause aftah a day's work? Do yo’ hab a terrible appetite at times, spechuly befo’ meals, an’ again no appetite at all, spechuly aftah meals? Dat settles it, Yo" got symptons. Whad yo’ need am a box ob Dr. Black's black pills fo’ black people. Go ‘long Deacon us G Gi JUDGE wiv yo"! I noticed fo’ some time plenty ob symptons in yo’ moral character, an’ I tells yo" right now dat ef yo’ wuz as scary "bout yo’ mortal soul as yo’ am ‘bout dat misabul carcase ob yo'ahs den I hab some hopes ob seein’ yo' a seraphim; but now I'se ‘fraid dat aftah yo’ dead an’ gone yo’ hab t’'sociate wid Colonel Bob an’ udder white trash.” THE ONLY ONE, Hojack—" Are you go- ing to the Thanksgiving- day ball?” Tomdtkh—“What ball?" Hojack— Foot-ball.” HEN women vote no woman will be sease 7" elected to office. STRICTLY AMERICAN. Tur count—"Ah, how sad! Ze genteelman have got a dee- Jack Boutown—"* Yes; foot-ball.” POWER OF THE PENCIL. A LEADING ARTIST of the JUDGE is cred- ited by the Buffalo News, the New York Press, and some other papers with being one of ENNUIED. Loutstantax—"* It's terribly dull to-day. Can't we get up (yatuns) a party and burn a nigger or something?” DEPARTMENT Ez mesial Miss Suoppy—** What size?" NO WORDS WASTED. the few living men whose car- toons have changed the vote in the United States senate, It was an incident of the silver-repeal battle. THIS IS A JOKE. She—' The Christian's creed has no recognition for the Sun- day newspaper.” He—"Why, on the contrary it distinctly refers to the World without end.” OUR DUSKY BROTHER. WHILE scoring theft, we must allow, The more he is a sinner The better chance he has just now ‘To have a turkey dinner. MAN may be in touch with a toothache without actually being in sympathy with it. Sitas—“* This !” comicbooks.com