Judge — December 2, 1893 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

tye ae ‘M. Guacory, Editor. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. ONITRD STATES AND CANADA I¥ ADVANCE One copy, one year, or s2 numbers - $5.00 ‘One copy, six months. or 26 numbers - ¢.90 One copy. forty weeks se Bas Tacluding the Cwmstuas June. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS— Te all for- ign countries tm the postal union, ‘a year. THE JupDGe PUBLISHING COMPANY (JUDGE BUILDING), Cor, Fifth Ave. and 16th Street, New York. Judge’s Comic Almanac for 1894. FIFTY PAGES OF ILLUSTRATIONS, INCLUDING TWO IN COLORS. after November 15. $¥7 NOTICE TO PUBLISHERS.—The contents of Juoce are protected by copy- right in both the United States and Great Britain. Infringement of this copyright will be promptly and vigorously prosecuted. T°? HAWAII—Enrring sister, depart in peace. eee WHERE THE MCLAUGHLIN sits is the foot of the table. HE RACE in New Jersey was apparently won by the laggard. PROVERB—t'’s a Brazil wind that blows no good to some- body. F THERE MUST be fighting South: Africa is just the place for it. NOTHING 1S IMPOSSIBLE to Chicago, and she foots the bill herself. TO GROVER —No closure to your health and good diges- tion, sir. GERMANY has one hundred thousand tramps, not count- ing the regular army. GIVE THANKS that the people tule and the bosses have ceas- ed to be their masters. ious Dewey Eave. POLITICIAN di- Brake O'Day OFF FOR TEXAS. Brake O'Day—"* Well, Dewey, dere was a hard frost, las’ about time we did the guilty-conscience act an’ give oursel’s up.’ “Will it be de same ole San Antonio murder racket?” No; we've worked dat too much. THE METHOD OF HIS MADNESS. LWAYS THE CRANK wants office or money, He understands value, excepting only the value of human life, He learns that when his own life is threatened. He is a crank, but he is not so crazy as to be irresponsible, WHERE THEY WON. AELWAS NOT LOST by the Democrats during the recent electoral unpleasantness. They carried a few ‘southern states by the usual majorities, and likewise the territory of Utah. More important still, they carried Salt Lake, and a dispatch from that city says, “This finally ends the anti-Mormon party in Utah.” Let us congratulate them. They have lost a few bosses, but they retain the institution of bigamy, or plural mar- riage. DAVID'S MISTAKE. T HAS BEEN Senator Hill's theory that the means to Democratic victory would never be objected to by his party, however bad they might be. Probably he knows better now. He ought to have known better through the results of the town elections following the stealing of the senate, but he was too wise in his own conceit at that time to either forget or learn, Time is a great teacher, and Senator Hill may become a good scholar before he dies. THE TIGERS AND THE BLUES. THE PREPARATIONS made to save the city from the students on Thanksgiving night are thought by some to be ample, The college fac- ulties have prayed for peace, the po- lice have been enjoined to be vigi- lant, and the militia have doubtless received orders to be in readiness for an urgent call, Still, it was a great oversight not to surround the city with our war-vessels, and the president ought to have sent out a call for seventy thousand volun- teers. ALL IS WELL. THIS HAS BEEN about as de- structive a year, with its bombs and accidents and its innumerable wt, crimes, as any of the ten that im- mediately preceded it; but we have at least escaped civil war and the day of judgment, and there has been an abundance of food not- 1g the fact that the scar city of work has denied many the privilege of earning it. However, there is an improvement at this writing, and next week, behold you! the world will delight itself with the Christmas JuDGE. ight. It's Dis time we'll make Deect ter election—* Hanged if I ever love another country!” it killin’ a sheriff ten years ago in Galveston.” Dewey Eave—* Make it anyt'ing so as we get shipped south free 0° cost, where a feller can feel dat he’s a gentleman,” LUCKY GROVER. TO MR. LOBENGULA—Bethink you, sir! breastplate across the bowels ? ‘TO ADMIRAL STANTON—Don't you know that there is such a thing as being too infernally courteous? Why don’t you wear your MB: MAYNARD has had all the vindication he wants. Another exper- iment of that kind and he would have to get another pair of jaws to chew his turkey with, ee JOSIAH QUINCY is too good and honest a politician to be lost in any ordinary Massachusetts, The nation wants Josiah, and in some way it is going to recover him CN ONE DAY of the year the eagle roosts low and omits to scream. The national bird on that day is the bird that gobbles but secures nothing but her own slaughter. THE EDITOR of the Buffalo Express is another of the lo think that “the spoils system ing the filling of offices—invites murder. Well, if some crank tries to shoot that editor let the Buffalo Express never issue another number. ‘mea THE PRESIDENT has succoed- ed in winning the opposition of some of the mugwump journals, and will presently win that of all of them. Whatever he may profess with regard to the miserable humbug called civil-service reform, he goes right on with the work of filling the offices with men of the party that put. him in office. That is justice, fair play, good politics, and common sense, and it strengthens him to the extent of a thousand good men for every mugwump who deserts his cause. A very lucky man is Grover Cleveland, He has practical wisdom as well as back- bone. His victory over his party opponents in the senate was great, but his victory over his mugwump worshipers is greater still. GIVE THANKS. THERE WILL BE small prosperity until there is a new tariff law, or. better still, until it is known that the old tariff law will stand. Still, you can be thankful, like the man who was about to starve to death, that things are no worse; and there is the remedy of the ballot-box which is coming slowly on and will get here in ‘ninety-six, or while some of us still live. Take comfort in that. Give thanks for that, and as well that no politics can cheat you out of your family and friends and the affection they and your creditors have for you. You may not be able to say “Whoop” and cut up, but you can be quietly and dignifiedly comfortable, and that is better than a fuss. Give thanks, anyhow. Lie to yourself if you can’t rationally do it otherwise—but give thanks. comicbooks.com