Judge — August 12, 1893 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE DEACON RANDOLPH’S PHILOSOPHY. HAD de mattah yo’ doan’ eat no breakfas’?” remarked Deacon Randolph the other morning. “1 doan’ feel well,” replied the Ran- dolph heir-apparent, “I eat sum lobster- salad las’ night an’ it doan’ agree wiv me.” The deacon fixed him for a moment with his glittering eye and then remarked, “Yo' got a pow'ful delicate stomach fo’ a young buck niggah. Was it lobster- salad dat made yo’ tack all ober de street fo" an hour, like de Puritan in a head-wind, belo’ yo’ cud maik de gate? Was it lob- ster-salad dat made yo’ fall up agin de front do’ so hard dat yo’ wake up yo’ po’ ol’ mudder? Did lobster-salad_maik yo’ IN CHICAGO, Tramp— Madam, will you give me a piece of pie for old times’ sake?” Mrs. Manyhusband— Old times! What do you mean, man?” Tramp— Why, have you forgot- ten me? I was your husband back in the ‘eighties.”” Mrs. Manyhusband (looking mild- | ly interested) —" Indeed? Your num- ber, please.” hang-yo' shoes on de gas-burner, frow yo" ¢lo’s on de ‘flo’, an’ go t’ bed wiv yo" hat on? Go'‘long wiv yo"! Ef yo" had said f dat niggah gin was de mattah wiv yo’ den A GLOOMY OUTLOOK. / 3 i \ yo" bin -jes‘-as good a man as Geo'ge G eed | Washin‘ton; ‘but now yo’ ain’ no bettah Bingo— There's a big boy waiting for you dan ainda outside the gate, Bobbie, and he is turning up his trousers at the bottom. What does he do COULD ACCOMMODATE HER. that for?” ee z Z F Young woman (with fiery red hair)— Bobbie (meckly)—"I guess he expects to f\34 AMIE SESE somne your hair ae wallow in my gore. . oe tresses.’ Cler ‘es, ma'am. Something to match your complexion?” WAITING, MY DARLING, FOR THEE. 4 5 = : Kaiser William (dreaming) —* Who are , = * A NATURAL QUESTION. you that dares to intrude upon my presence?” ——s-——, < : $* POL have to put all of this stamp Apparition —"\'m the Dull, Heavy Thud, Sea on one letter?” asked Aunty Sas- and I'm waiting for you.” £ = = . safras when she bought her first Colum- 4 bian.two-center. GOOD ADVICE. *4GAY, Barlow,” said Charley Noo, “you “THE IRONY OF PATE. have been a swell longer than I have, and I want you to tell me something about card etiquette.” Ziyf \\ SNS. “Certainly,” said Barlow. . Sg (fll WSN. Na “ When you go to call on an un- dertaker's daughter never send up the queen of spades.” A NATURAL QUERY. ¢¢CO THAT is a Venetian gondola, is it?” said Skid- more to a Columbian guard. elt ie Venice the thing going-to start?” HOW IS IT? [7 15 on warmth (so I've been told) That friendship much depends. How is it then, though cash is cold, It has so many friends? CLEAR ENOUGH. Mamma—1 saw you play- ing in the lot, Johnni Joknnie—" | know you did.” Mamma—"How did you know it?” Johnnie—""Cause you jus’ 1, SUE (fo museum freak)—" George, we'll get wet.” told me so.” 2. MUSEUM FREAK—"'I don’t think we'will. 1'll over- come that.” comicbooks.com