Judge — December 24, 1892 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE THE CONSEQUENCE. HAVE done my Christmas shopping. Far and - wide and high and low I have traveled, making purchases for every- one I know. T have scrupulously striven to be bounteous ; have given proofs of my regard un- stintingly, nor heeded the expense. T have scattered my remembrances with lavish hand and free, ‘And my purse is gauntly shrunken, with such stern persistency Have I made my presentations to my numerous relations and acquaintances. All I have left is sixty-seven cents, T have reaped my due reward, I have a very large supply— ‘An oyerwhelming avalanche—of Christmas gifts; and I Have expressed my thankful pleasure in exuberant full measure ; yea, and I have written grateful notes and bland acknowledgments, ‘And I have said in each, with an untruthfulness depraved, That the article in question was the thing I most have craved— With my breath jn scared suspension from the dismal apprehensjon which possesses me; for I have only sixty-seven cents. Shall I find me food and raiment in a walking-stick bamboo Or a silver-mounted ink-stand ; in a smoking-jacket blue With a yellow satin facing; or a red plush box embracing comb and brush and hand- glass ; or a pair of mantel ornaments? Shall I look for sustenance to a large bottle of cologne? Shall a fancy scarf-pin stay me? Nay, my troubled soul makes moan, This the dark and woeful reason that the joyous Christmas season leaves me grim, despair- ing—my assets are sixty-seven cents. Fanaa Hayrick—"' B’gosh ! I worn these old clo'es fer ten year; now they'll jes’ do fer the scare- —Take that, you old skinflint !" Misstonary—'‘Are you a Christian?” *Rastus—"* Does I look like a Jew Jim THE CRACKER—"' Here comes old Hayrick. I'll settle our old feud onct fer all.— 'mm—** ‘Scuse me, sah; I made a mistake, sah.” EARY WALKER—"* Don't mention it.” HOW WEARY WALKER GOT MORE THAN HE WANTED. comicbooks.com