Judge, 1892-11-19 · page 6 of 16
Judge — November 19, 1892 — page 6: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page collects multiple short satirical jokes typical of Judge's format: **Political Content:** "Following a Great Example" references the 1892 presidential campaign, comparing Democratic speechmaking to Chauncey Depew's famous principle of never expressing opinions without "a square feed" (full stomach). The joke mocks Democratic campaign rhetoric as hollow. **Social Satire:** Other jokes target contemporary concerns—a merchant hiring someone to lie about discount prices (Democratic politicians as natural liars), a job applicant claiming experience making speeches, and various domestic/servant humor. **General Humor:** Several jokes mock everyday situations: juries distracted by tedious anecdotes, overzealous housekeeping during health board anxiety, romantic rejection via a diamond-tester uncle, and the universal experience of accidentally sticking one's finger in an inkwell in darkness. The illustrations are crude woodcuts typical of 1890s satirical magazines. The overall tone combines class-conscious humor, political mockery of Democrats, and relatable domestic comedy aimed at middle-class readers.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
A QUICK VER- DICT. oe HAT made Ww the jury render a verdict so quickly?” “Well, you see, one of the jurors began to tell us about the bright sayings of his five- year-old boy.” WELL QUALI- FIED. Merchant—" Do you think you could keep a straight face and tell the cus- tomers that every- A PLON-KER, thing on the bar- gain-table is a hundred per cent. below cost ?” Applicant for position—' Well, I've been making Democratic FOLLOWING A GREAT EXAMPLE. speeches all through the campaign.” Mitey Watxer—" Who do yer think is goin’ ter be de nex’ candidates fer resident, Weary?” ‘i Pree AVEARY WILKINS (wasticating contents of paper bag)—": Don't never ask me NOTHING TO GRASP. ter give no ‘pinions when I'm a-eatin’, Miley. Dat's one p'int me an’ Chauncey 44 CAN'T give you a job without discharging some one else,” said agrees on—never ter express our views on anything till we have had a square feed. Mr. Dimity to an applicant for employment. “I'd like to employ you, but you grasp the situation, don’t you?” “Well, sir,” was the reply, “under the circumstances I hardly see how I can.” METHOD IN HIS MADNESS. Marjorie—"V'm sure you have a treasure in him, my dear. I never saw a more thoughtful young man.” Madge—"Yes; he never forgets anything. He wouldn't even think of taking part in one of those foot-ball games without having the family physician with him.” HAD HEARD ’EM BEFORE. Y. M. C. A, official —" Well, Charles, did you read the bible through, as I suggested Young man—*Oh, yes.” Y. AM. C. A. official Didn't you get a good deal of information from it?” Young man—" Not much. Most of them sayings is chestnuts.” WOULDN'T PASS. Cieverton —"* Is it true, old man, that your girl has gone back on you and returned the ring ?” Dasnaway —* Tam afraid it is, old fellow, and I am all broken up.” CLEVERTON (sympathetically)—"* What did she say ‘9 when she returned it? Dasitaway —" Oh, she didn’t return it in person. She sent it by her uncle.”* CurverToN —" Her uncle! Why, what has he to do with it?” Dasitaway (sadly) —"* He is a diamond-tester by trade.” EVIL TIMES. Mistress of the house—" Bridget!” Bridget—"Ves'm.” Mistress—" Have you swept and dusted the chambers? Bridget—"Yes'm.” Mistress—* And wiped the fly-specks from the windows ?” Bridget—" Yes'm.” AMistress—" And disinfected the sink, and scat- tered chloride of lime over the lawn and flower- beds, and perfunied the bath, and fumigated the bugs on the plants, and washed the baby's face, and buried the sparrow that the cat caught yes- terday Bridget—"VYes'm.” Mistress—" Then uncork the bottle of carbolic acid and light a stick of Japanese incense. The board of health may be upon us at any moment, DID YOU EVER? but, the Lord providing, we shall escape the courts.” Did you ever feel around in a dark hotel-room —stick your finger into the ink-stand by xc fora match and—~ mistake? comicbooks.com