Judge — October 1, 1892 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

THE PRIESTESS OF POLITICS. AM NO ‘hero-worshiper, nor do’I bend the knee To any man, however great or famous he may be. Of course I'm fond of geniuses, and talents win my praise; But then I do not walk a mile at well- ° known men to gaze. I know of men and women who have won fame in the arts And others on the stage have acted memorable parts, And many are there deeply versed in medicine and law ; But idols they are not to me, nor fill they me with awe. But, ah, there's one before whose throne I bow me lowly down-— The woman who is anxious for political renown, I fall in meek prostration, as the humble always do, As she begins to argue on the source of revenue. She thrills me nigh to rapture and my ardor waxes warm As she discusses learnedly the tariff and reform ; And as upon the platform like a prophetess she stands I'm sure the country’s fate rests in the hollow of her hands. A MISER’S ECONOMY. septs A PITY old Golddust can’t see the effect of that single eye-glass stuck in his eye.” “He is too short-sighted to see how he looks, and it wouldn't make any difference if he did. He is too miserly to buy a pair.” ROOM FOR TWO. She—“Here is the hammock and there is a’ chair. Which do you prefer?” He—*1 think the hammock would be more comfort- able.” She—" Then I will have the chair taken away.” I—AIR; -TA-RA-RA-BOOM-DE-AY.* FOR A» SADDENING FECT. “D * Pray hire a German band R wife, if I should die,” Said McGinness, as he lay, At my funeral to play.” “And why a German band?" ‘Then McGinness’s voice replied “So that all the people there May be sorry. that I died.” THE IMPRESSION. F t's wonderful what a large number of candidates you have for president.” American —" Why—how so?” Englishman —" Because upon every banner | see there are different-looking men.” ALL EYES UPON HIM. SYOUR son has a very prominent government position, I hear.”” “Yes, it’s a regular cynosure.” JUDGE : Db A DISCOUNT. Op Dry—"* How much is de shoes?" SHOEMAKER —“* Two dollars.” OLp Dry—* What will yer ‘low me fer the ones I has on ?* PRECAUTIONS. +4 JULIA,” said Doctor Pillingcare, sitting down at the table and glancing critically at the various dishes placed thereon, " have the water and milk been boiled?” “And the forks and spoons and plates newly scalded ?” Yes; you can feel them hot yet.” Is the table linen fresh from the laundry ?” Bridget rose at fotir to have it done in time.” ‘ou are sure she used the disinfectant in washing as 1 directed ?” “Oh, yes; smell.” “Do you think cook takes a thorough bath every day “Tean't say. “ Well, please take the morning paper out of the fumi- gator and let us have breakfast. I suppose one must take some chances with these cholera germs.” ALL MODERN IMPROVEMENTS. Head of the house —*What is that terrible noise up stairs?" Daughter —"Jeannette is running the new sewing- machine.” Head of the house —"* Well, tell her to put on the soft pedal.” “wee RA-BOOM-DE-AY.” 2—AIR: “TAR. comicbooks.com