Judge, 1892-03-19 · page 10 of 18
Judge — March 19, 1892 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page contains several unrelated satirical pieces typical of Judge magazine's humor: **"A Necessary Precaution"** mocks wealthy American society's eagerness to welcome the Duke of Marlborough, satirizing the social climbing of the era by suggesting he sign a document pledging honorable intentions—implying society fears he's a fortune hunter. **"The Ending of a Romance"** parodies melodramatic romantic literature (referencing Petrarch and "Jean Libbey's" sentimental novels) by having a man wax poetic about love in ornate language, only to be rejected because he lacks a Vassar education—a joke about women's education and pretentious courtship rituals. **"A Word in Season"** is a St. Patrick's Day warning to Irish immigrants ("Pat") about maintaining respectability. **"Keep Him Out"** references Colonel Robert Ingersoll, a famous atheist and freethinker, sardonically suggesting Christians shouldn't convert him because his argumentative nature would be destructive. **"American Fashion"** depicts an immigrant tailor (stereotypical dialect) absurdly shortening pants and using suspenders as compensation—mocking both immigrant workers and changing fashion trends.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ARY PRECAUTION. OUR BEST SOCIETY will receive the Marlboroughs with open arms, always provided the duke will sign a document pledging himself to such honorable inten- tions that he cannot squeeze it to death PRIDE THAT HAD A FALL. Suppose you've heard the news f took first prize at the show,” pe - ! “I'm worth a good deal of money now, you know !" “I've had all I want !" THE ENDING OF A ROMANCE, THEY WERE sitting, Percy Ronald Percy and Mary Ann, on a sofa as the evening shadows began to gather,and under the subtle influences of those feelings which now and then come over most young men Percy spoke : “These many moons, dear one, has love's ichor coursed through my veins. Petrarch’s love for Laura, the love of Jean Libbey's most passionate hero, cannot compare wth mine.” Here he sighed a heavy mid-winter sigh and continue “Ours shall be another palace by the lake of Como; for us the merry minstrels of the air shall pipe their sweetest roundelays ; an ether redolent of rare perfumes shall surround us, and dreants most beatific shall lull us into soft repose 5 His arms stole toward her lissome form with a swift, burglar-like, grasping grasp, and he added: “Olympus-like we'll soar into the em- pyrean of happiness " But the very magnitude of the image made him pause, and then, though her eyes with tears were wet, she murmured : “Percy, we must part forever. I wasn't educated at Vassar, and I can never, no, never, wed a man who can't make love in English undefiled.’ Fare thee well!” And he went into the outer darkness, vowing, in the future only to make love to a girl who knew a genius when she saw one. A WORD IN SEASON. JUST now itis best to remember, Pat As St. Patrick's day is nigh, ‘That while well enough to have green in your hat You mustn't have green in your eye. * KEEP HIM OUT. CHRISTIANS must not pray for the con- version of Colonel Ingersoll, He is AMERICAN FASHION, naturally combative. and if he were to be Rick Dexovay —" Vis, thim pants are too short, shure.” converted his fighting would be destructive Iskart. Mosvs—*" Not at all, mine frendt. Here is det fashion-blate. 1 vill put der susbenders on der bottom free ov inside the lin sharge.” —that he lost his balance. ‘The simple pigeon moralizes, comicbooks.com