Judge, 1892-03-05 · page 13 of 18
Judge — March 5, 1892 — page 13: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertisements and humorous filler content** from Judge magazine, with minimal political satire. **What's here:** - Tobacco, bicycle, cocoa, and patent medicine ads (typical late 19th/early 20th-century marketing) - "Carl Pretzel's Philosophy": ethnic dialect humor featuring a German-accented character offering folksy wisdom—a common comedic trope of the era - Brief joke items: absurdist humor about a woman choosing chewing tobacco over marriage, a man unwilling to babysit, and railroad progress - Product endorsements using pseudo-scientific claims (Epps's Cocoa curing "maladies," Beecham's Pills) **The satire, if any:** The "Investment vs. Speculation" headline at bottom suggests financial commentary, but no actual content appears. **For moderns:** Most humor relies on now-outdated ethnic stereotyping and patent medicine absurdity. The page illustrates how advertising and entertainment were indistinguishable in this era, and how products made wildly unsubstantiated health claims without regulation.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
Tobacco 1s man’s most universal luxury; the fragrant aroma of Mas- tiff Plug Cut starts people to pipe- smoking, even those who never used tobacco before, J. B. Pace Tobacco Co., Richmond, Va. “You must give up that horrible gum,” said he, ** Because, if you don't, you mayn't marry m “Phen the crystal tears gathered in her bright eyes of blue, ‘And she sobbed, ‘I shall marry no man — but chew."” —Indianapolis Journal. YOU HAVE SOMETHING to live Jor if you have met seen our new < y ~ CENTURY COLUMBIA, with Pneumatic Tires. Light, Strong, DuraNe, and fully guaranteed. POPE MFG. CO., 21 Columbus Ave, Boston. 12 Warren 8t,, 8. Y. We re ong eh Aire, Cheng, A Famous French Chef once wrote: “ The very soul of cook- ing is the stock-pot, and the finest stock-pot is Liebig Company’s Extract of Beef.” ly with signature. In improved and economic . For Soups, Sauces and Made Dishes. GRATEFUL—COMFORTING. EPPS’S COCOA BREAKFAST. wnt BYa thorough knowledge of the natural laws which govern digestion and nutrition, and by'a careful ap- piston ofthe fe properties of wellaciected Cocoa i. Epps as provided our breakiast tables with a delica bevehage which may eave us many Denny decors Glle Teis by the Judicious tse of euch articles of det that a constitu gradual i up until strong enough to resist ev tendency to discise. - Hundreds of subtle maladies are foatin Around ts ready to attack wherever there isa weak point, We Ay escape many a fatal shaft by Keeping gurscives well fort fed with’pure blood and a properly noursbed at ‘with boiling water or milk, Sold only in half ¥ Grocers, labelled thus: JAMES EPPS & Co., Homeopathic Chemists, London, England, ‘frame.—" Civil | CARL PRETZEL'S PHILOSOPHY No feller cood got'shgware mit a round of pleasures, Mister Sampson vas a pooty shtrong man, but he don'd cood lift a mortgage up. Dots besser you don’d told eferyting vat you know, dhen you got somedings for seed. ‘cCASSY BROS. & CO. of Cincinnati, Ohio, make the finest toilet soaps in the world. None better. 4; They say that Litteby is courting that great tall girl, Miss High.” Yes." ‘*1 should like to see him Kissing her good-night when he's leaving her.” ‘* He never says good-night.” No?” ‘No: he shakes hands with her and looks at her and says * So long.’ "— Yarmouth Register. Van Houten’s Cocoa —The original, most soluble. There are men who would be willing to go on a mis- sion to China who are not willing to sit down and rock the baby for a half-hour.—Ram's Horn. Angostura Bitters are the best remedy for removing indigestion. Ask your druggist for the genuine, pre- pared by Dr. J. G. B. Siegert & Sons, A CENTURY OF IMPROVEMENT. One hundred years ago the governor of New York advised its people not to invest in railroads, predicting that they could never be successfully operated. To-day the New York Central sends a train across the empire state, four hundred and thirty-six and a half miles in four hundred and twenty-five and three-quarters min- and is worthily called ‘America’s Greatest Rail- Sttenegprevresssestereesesngssranesre ses, “WORTH A GUINEA A BOX.” PRICE, as CENTS A BOX, Str NOTIGE. nL Complying with general request BEECHAM’S PILLS wall in future for the United States be covered with a uickly Soluble. Pigeons Coating completely disguising the taste of the pill without In any way impairing its efficacy. New York depot, 365 Canal street. 105 pe teanecaeraeet oe | gettasarsnrseetaesenteanerstereereon eaten! Ask your doctor what hap- pens to cod-liver oil when it gets inside of you. He will say it is shaken and broken up into tiny drops, becomes an emulsion ; there are other changes, but this is the-first. He will tell you also that it is economy to take the oil broken up, as it is in Scott's Emulsion, rather than bur- den yourself with this work, You skip the taste too. Let us send you an inter- esting book on CAREFUL LIV- ING; free, Score & Bowne, Chemist, r3»South sth Avenoe, Your drtgist keeps Scot's Emulsion of co-liver dail druggists everywhere doy §re FOING 3F PERF EEWON ATTAINED BY WARWICK PERFECTION CYCLES ALERTED BY THE u 5. BOYER NMEN depen td FACIAL SOAP ny Cmmalinion fees oh een ov 0p oat, Open sem to} Da DETECTIVES © ae habit cured wrtnour surrexmc, No fee until cured. PLU ee nines rice ©. S. Saxcent, M. D., Beacon street, Brookline, Mass, The Best Work BY THE Simplest Means etre Shortest Time 1s Accomplished By THE Remington Standard Typewriter Send for Illustrated Catalogue, Wyckoff, Seamans & Benedict, 327 BROADWAY, NEW YORK. Investment vs. Speculation ‘Dividend Paying Inv It will pay you if you haye any money to invest, either large or small sums, to send for pamphlet ‘* Investment 1, Speculation.” "Free to any one meationing this paper. et TAYLOR & RATHYON, Denver, Boston, or New York. “ | comicbooks.com