Judge — December 19, 1891 — page 2: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE PUBLISHED ONCE A WEEK, W. J. Argent. 1 Bruxwaun Giitas . M. Gencony, Editor. TERMS TO SUBSCRIBERS. UNITED STATES AND CANADA, IN. ADVANCE One copy, one year. or 52 numbers - $3.00 One copy, six months, of 26 numbers - 2.0 One copy. for 13 weeks = = =a, Including the Cuxtstsas Juoce. FOREIGN SUBSCRIPTIONS—Tealt for ign countries in the postal union, ‘$a year. THE JUDGE PUBLISHING COMPANY (JupcE BUILDING), Cor. Fifth Ave. and 16th Street, New York. ntee advertisers a larger circulation at cheaper rates than any other jcal paper published. Brentano's, 17 Avenue de [Opera fe by the American ing Willian street, Strand, W dom: at Saarbachs ‘many. and by Ch. sth, viteerland. E JUDGE regrets to announce that its very large edition of the Christmas number has been exhausted, and it is impossible to reproduce the number. E UNDERSTAND that Mr. Blaine is making diligent inquiry as to the state of President Harrison's health. MB. CLEVELAND will not turn bis because if he did he couldn't get it. and over to get that nomination, eee [F THERE had been a contest for the name of the new cruiser the New York it would have gone west regardless of expense. ME-B.NYE ought to know bet- ter than to take a step fifteen feet down. He always did have too much confidence in his legs. THE KAISER says in effect that he owns his army body and soul. This places his majes siderably higher than the angels. MAYOR GRANT did not kiss the blarney-stone. As a ambitious and deserving west. And we must always remember that grapes are not necessarily sour because they hang high. THE STUDENTS of Wellesley college have had a real “rush” The cheers of the struggling classes: consisted of one word, prouounced without spelling—* Ouch.” And the only crow of triumph was this—* 1 will never speak to Mame Thompson again, darn ‘cr. Now is this progress? THE EFFECT OF IT. g GOVERNOR HILL is naturally afraid of the tariff and hence his de- sire to make the silver question the leading issue; but his de tion to that effect will make most other Democrats crazy for the tariff question, BLOTTING OUT THE RETURNS. To HAVE FAIR elections and fair counting of returns you must get 4 new kind of man, More simplicity and less tape would come nearer the end than any other plan of reform. Meanwhile there ought to be more men in the penitentiary for corrupting and making to some extent inoperative the system on which the whole structure of republicanism rests. THE VACUUM, SO CALLED. M*: LAMONT as the chief representative of Mr. Cleveland had no chance for a place in the national committee on the swelling created by the resignation of H. Oelrichs, so Mr. Sheehan was promoted to it. It is suggested by the Elmira Adiertiser that’ Mr. Sheehan would naturally prefer Flower for president because that would give Mr. Sheehan the governorship. At first glance this seems start- ling; but nobody must get agi- tated—it isn't. A PROHIBITION HANG- MAN, AN ELDER of the Presbyterian church of Nebraska recently said, “If Thad my way 1 would pass a prohibition law and han} the first man who violated i The Lord has evidently provided Tammany man he felt it necessary to pull it up and bring it with hin, M®: HURLBERT, combing his hair before a mirror—* Hah! Go away from here, Wilfrid Mur- ray! Don’t you know I’m looki for you?” junction ‘THK FIREMAN —"* Seven miles.”” steam here. I'm most froze.” THE INFLUENZA is so prevalent in Europe there is a suspicion that the potentates ‘are more than usually up to snuff. WHILE FORTY MILLION of his subjects are starving the czar is supposed to be contemplating war. One would think there would be more corpses than graves as things are. GENERAL BUTLER is a very stubborn man, and when it was re- ported the other day that he was about to die he cocked his more serviceable eye and said severely, “I'll do it when I get ready.” Younc MR. FIELD is not a thief, but a kleptomaniac. He is no’ criminal, but a lunatic. Poor man! how much more he is to be pitied than the men he has robbed of their money and good name. THERE ARE TWO stories about Rudyard Kipling, one that he is going to be married and the other that he is going to die, and next week we shall probably have the cost of his shroud and his dress suit. OM PEDRO was a good man, and heaven was kind in sending him out of Brazil and letting him die before witnessing the end of the existing Brazilian complications. From the scriptural standpoint his cross is now his crown, N ATIONAL CONVENTIONS are well enough in their way; but New York has several of them every day, and it is well to encourage the NOT A PALATIAL TRIP. SauLey (appearing from man-hole in tender) —"* Wow fur is it Scarboro us SMiLey —"I wish you'd ask his nibs at th’ throttle t’ blow back a leetle that this elder shall not have his way. If all good men were cre- ated as he is everybody would be hanged, an opposing opinion be- ing rank heresy, the same to be punishable by death, And what a lonely world this would be with nobody but the elder in it to enjor it. How that man would hug himself with delight as his eagle eye swept over a boundless universe of graves. OUR COMPOSITE SPEECH. HE PEOPLE of Boston, according to Edwin Arnold, preserve the purest traditions of English speech. We of New York have the ab- solute modern fact; and with a little modern slang, presently to be adopted by Boston on the suspicion that it has its Latin and Greek roots and was essentially Hebraic after the fall of man, it makes extremely forcible language without being bald-headed or turning a gray hair. For, after all, there are things which have some linguistic and euphonic value even if they were not rolled around the tongues and spit out by the patriarchs, ABOUT BANNERS. HE STATEMENT is made that Governor Hill while at Atlanta re- quested that the confederate flag be removed from the Grady pro sion and exercises. It is our impression that he didn’t. It was not his privi- lege to direct the proceedings, but merely to give his oration, And we have a pretty clear idea as to the dignity of the best flag in the world and the liberty it allows to other banners. It is good enough and strong enough to be generous, and it forbids no men the honest privilege of honoring their heroes whether the heroes were right or wrong. This liberty was the thing the flag was made for. It is the chief thing that is forbidden and punished by tyrants who have respect for no opinion and no affection but their own. comicbooks.com