Judge — November 21, 1891 — page 10: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE A NOVEL SUGGESTION. ATILDA JANE DOROTHY ABIGALL BILK Had a face like a scarecrow, a temper like silk. Her heart it was gentle, her soul it was kind, And filled with much knowledge and lore was her mind ; But her lack of true beauty was simply immense, And her goodness somehow seemed a poor rec- ompense. Now Abigail Bilk had a lover whose eyes Saw only in her a most wonderful prize. His name it wa: Shaggs, and quite often he went ‘To visit Miss Bilk, who, he thought, had been sent From heaven on purpose his sweet life to bless And make his afllictions on earth to seem less. Two friends one fine night he invited to call ‘*She may not be handsome as Rullian Lis- With him on the maiden who held him in " thrall, Quoth Shaggs, bristling up like an obsti- The two friends turned white as good, genu- nate thistle ; ine milic “But Abbie is good, and, sir, character's On seeing Jane Dorothy Abigail Bilk ; worth But they managed to keep their own’ pres- All the transient beauty there is upon ence of mind, earth; For they couldn't help seeing that she was And then it were well in your mind e’er to refined. cep The proverb that ‘Beauty is only skin cep And when they came out of her dwelling that night Shaggs asked, ‘Do you like, boys, my ‘In that case,” said one of Shaggs's friends, heart's best delight?” “were T you, "Yes," answered one friend; “but how Some time when I had nothing better homely she is! to do, ¢ How can you find courage that creature to I'd skin her to see if the proverb be true.” kiss? LEON EAD, AN UNIDENTIFIED NOBODY. Lovise—'* See that little insignificant fellow yonder? That’s Mrs Splurger's husband.” CLara—" Indeed? What was his name before marriage 7" A WISE YOUNG MAN. a drink,” said Chappie as the steamship left the pier. returned Borrowton ; “let us wait until we are outside. 1 never drink behind the bar.” THE FATAL GIFT OF BEAUTY. Primus —"He finally won her, though she vowed he never would, didn’t he?” Secundus —"Yes; she couldn't discourage him by showing him the cold shoulder.” Primus —" Naturally, He wasn't a dress-reformer.”” A MATTER OF TASTE. Ske—"He says he hasn’t proposed to her, as his father desired, because she is too rich for him.” BREAKING I GENTED. He—" Well, she is pretty well seasoned. She's been through twelve.” Hov yez an impty pictur’-frame 2” Di hov not. Wad a looky-glass frame do yez 2” ¥N—" It would, but it’s not fer me. hey wor a bad bhlast wint aff in th’ ditch below, an’ th’ foorman sint me up wid yure man’s hat fer a kape- sake.” A NEW NAME FOR IT. ; BASS-VIOL had been smuggled into the choir-loft to help out, the organ, What is that?" demanded the Scotch Presbyterian dominie as he heard the strains, “A bass-viol, sir,” explained the sexton. “You're wrong. It’s an ungodly big fiddle, and I want it stopped.” THE AMATEUR ACTRESS. T! ME was she dreaded envy’s sting, But now she’s growing wiser And never does a single thing That will not advertise her. EASY ENOUGH. ‘ Bang le—* What! an- ~- other new vest? Where do EGOTIATION ON THE WING. you get them all?” Baver—"" What's young Duncaster skipping around his father in that saa way for Peterkin—"My room- INKLER —"' Ile’s trying to borrow five dollars for a supper-ticket, and the mate is off on his vacation.” old man’s as deaf as a haddock.” rd comicbooks.com