Judge, 1891-08-01 · page 2 of 20
Judge — August 1, 1891 — page 2: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* contains several distinct satirical pieces: **"At the College Games"** (top): A poem mocking young women at college sporting events, portraying them as frivolous—more interested in appearing attractive and impressing male admirers than in the games themselves. The satire reflects turn-of-century anxieties about "New Women" and their public visibility. **"Depravity"** (right illustration): Shows a man smoking and gambling at window-bets, satirizing vice among the upper classes. **"A Disappointment All Round"** (bottom): A domestic quarrel between husband and wife—likely satirizing marriage expectations and financial independence debates of the era. The page also includes humorous proposed book titles parodying contemporary literature trends. Overall, the content reflects period concerns about women's changing roles, morality, and social behavior.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
AT THE COLLEGE GAMES. QDS streams of maids and youngsters flew? Aroupd ey otal smooth and green While neisy cheers contending go FPo stir the aclors in the scene; Wbile here and there. a preffy pair Bits of delicious nonsense share. And one fair'girl impartial Waits Jo cheer the Winners in her heert, While for these frowned en by the fates Phe prelliest of feardreps sleri— A rmsid of neutral laaghs and ‘sighs, Who heeds not either groans or cries, NOT THE KIND HE MEANT. Per lady cheehs are smooth and fair, As rose-leades IWain her dainly lips, Fhe sunlight on her bended hair Phe glossy tresses sofily lips; lll crovdned by that mild, gentle grace Qf heartwWhele thought chout the face. Rergolfen both the crowd and gemes; And as I puff of my cigar, Ald as my jaded fancy flemes, Phe picture fades from sight far. I puff—see clouds of ashes float, Phen settle down upen my coal ye wir sreeny. A MISTAKE. OME ONE was bragging to Jones of the amount of ancient and valu- + ‘| BELIEVE I met you at Mrs. Smythe’s last year, did I not?” able bric-A-brac he had collected. “You should have seen that gpindle-legged table I picked up last week. It's four hundred years old if it’s a day.” “Why, that isn’t a patch to that Grecian bit of furniture in my study. Why, it’s over two thousand years since it was made,” replied Jones, not to be outdone. “You're joking.” “Certainly not. Come over and see my multiplication table.” SOME POSSIBLE TITLES OF FUTURE BOOKS. ‘+ PEOPLE Who Like My Novels,” by Libby Jean Laura. “Why'I Should Be the Next Candidate on Both Sides,” by Belva Lockwood. “A Guide to Post-prandial Oratory,” by C. M Depew. “The Art of Rearing Mustaches,” by Honorable and also General E. F. Jones of Binghamton. “Gossip from Nirvana,” by the late Madame Bla- vatsky. ~* My First Remembrances of Grove,” by Elizabeth Cleveland. “An Account of the Mouse-trap I Invented,” by Jay Gould. “Me and the Other Prophets,” by Sergeant Dunn. “The Light Fantastic: or, How to Emerge from Obscurity all Standi “The World's Fair and Why It Failed,” by a dis- appointed Chicago speculator in real es “How I Acquired My Fluency in the German Tongue,” by Buffalo Bill. Loy aman, WORLDLY WISDOM. TITLE may date from the days when the French To Albion came and proceeded to wrench ‘The land from the lords and roughly to fi A title may date from Victoria's reign, And the way to, discover their a For the poorer the lord the older “No; it must have been my twin sister, [have not come out yet.” DEPRAVITY. THis is the time when mosqui- toes make bets ‘That they'll get, somehow, through the window-nets. A DISAPPOINTMENT ALL ROUND. ** Young man, when you married my daughter T never supposed that you were .v —"" Well, sir, why didn’t you give her enough at the start to be independent?” comicbooks.com