Judge — June 6, 1891 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

‘The blazer is declared to be out of style by the four | hundred. In that case the occupation of those who undertook to play lawn tennis with their clothes is a departed glory.— Pittsburg Dispatch. When a lady of uncertain age tells you coyly that she has seen twenty-seven summers it is altogether impolite to ask her if she remembers how the last one of, the twenty-seven looked,—Somerville Journal. “One thing I like about our new man,” said a mem- ber of the firm to his partner, ‘tis that he's reliable, You can always tell what he is going to do next.” “And what is that?” “Nothing.” Washington Post, When Baby was sick, we gave her Castoria, ‘When sho was a Child, she cried for Castoria. ‘When she became Miss, she clung to Castoria, ‘When she had Children, ahe gave them Castoria. A Central American with fathomless nerve and inge- nuity has invented a poem which he wants to sell to the world’s fair managers. _ It contains twenty-five hundred stanzas, and its designer will sell it for three thousand dollars, cash or on easy payments, agreeing to throw in a reading of the poem in some public place, taking nine days for the job and presenting copies to all those who will listen.—Chicago News. “ Where's all our gold now going ?” ‘The financiers exclaim ; From Maine to San Francisco The query i the same, Who's got it? There’s no answer Though all, somehow, agree There only comes in chorus, “*T know it isn't me —Chicago Journal ASK FOR Packer's ‘Tar Soap Tho {deal for Toilet, Bath and Shampoo, It pos- sesses hygienic qualities not found in any other soap, and has, for years, enjoyed the preference of physicians, ! 25 cents. All Druggists. VERY BEST ALL: ~TOBACCO on arma Marke SMOKE NO OTHER. Consolidated Clrarette Co. Ave.D& TT Are Da sothat NewYork, NSDLS <: THE "HE CELEBRATED __ ‘Aro at present the Most Popular and arama na beenits Leading Artists, Warerooms, 149, 151, 163, 155 East 4th St. wY. SO0HMER & CO, Crcngo, Int» anf State Strests San Fasvestep, Cat Union Club Building’: St. Louis, Mo., x20 Olive Street; Kansas Cry, ‘Main Street Get ern ERY ~ iA STEPHEN F. WHITMAN & SON, “eLnventons avo SoLe Marrs. ~!- PHILADELPHIA. + THEBARKER BRAND wy LINEN COLLARS ABSOLUTELY BEST. | Weekly. THE CALF ON THE LAWN. I'm goin’ to hitch this ‘ere young caff out here in my front lawn ; He'll stay right here an’ chaw the grass till the hull thing is chawn ; He'll chaw thet comer off to-day until he’s et it bare ; Ter-morrer I will move his stake an’ he'll chaw over there. Looks bad, yer say, to see a caff out in a man’s front yard, An’ blattin” like a barn-yard on this stylish boolevard ; But that air caff shall eat that grass until I get him fat, An’ if he feels like blattin’, w'y, I reckon he will blat. W'en I fast took my farm out here this wuz a country ‘Across the way wuz parstchure lan’, ware huckleberries wed. My caff waz then hitched in my yard fer the hull town's ection, An‘ no darn enterprisin’ dood cum roun’ to make objec- tion, Wren this road growed a village street my caff wuz in the yard, An’ now the street it swells ‘ith style—a city boolevard, But Twill hitch this ere young eaff out here in my front Hell oy right here an’ chaw the grass till the hull g is chawn, You say the way I carry on makes the hull city laff. Wall iac'em lad; this eres my lawn an’ this ere is my caf, An’ things hez reached the purtiest pass the worl’ hez ever sawn Ef an ol” duff can't let his caff chaw grass on his own lawn, Wall, let ‘em laff; this ‘ere young caff shall stay here anyhow, An’ if I hear 'em laff too hard I'll trot out the ol’ cow. T'll hitch ‘em both to the same stake right here in my front lawn, ‘An’ let ‘em stay an’ chaw the grass till the hull thing is chawn! —S. W. Foss in the Yankee Blade. Mrs. Winstow's Sootitinc Syrup for Children Teething ; soothes the child, softens the gums, allays all pain, cures wind colic and diarrhora, "25 cents a Lady—"'1 wish to select a pet dog." Dealer — “Live in the city, I suppose, mum?" Lady—'* Yes : Llive in a flat.” “Dealer —"'Then I should advise an Italian greyhound, mum. No matter how much you feeds a greyhound ‘he allers stays narrer."—New York GRAND, UPRIGHT AND SQUARE. TO RENT, INSTALLMENTS, AND EXCHANGED. Fifth Avenue, cor. l6th Street, New York. RED | H AN ALLSOPP'S ALE. ED a EAS BREWERS. In SUEY. IMPORTE: re TWERYWHERE. D. ‘The reason things go wrong so often in this world is that men won't take women’s advice, If you don't be- lieve this at frst just go and ask the women—that's all. —Somerville Journal. One of the compulsory studies in the public schools should be the teaching of children not to biow out a gas-light. It might save more lives than temperance physiology. — Binghamton Republican. ROKER’S BITTERS since 1828 acknowledged to be by far the best and finest Stomach Bitters made, wheth- er taken or with pure wines or liquors or other cordials, Traveler —"'1 tell you, sir, the most admirable house- keeper that ever lived was my mother-in-law.” ‘And she is no longer living?’ ‘“‘Alas, no! Eaten by the cannibals in Africa.” “* You don't mean it?" ‘It was even so. When the cannibals had thrust her into the caldron and she was beginning to cook she cried out faintly with her last words, ‘Don’t forget the salt and pepper !'"—Fliegende Blatter. Extract °f BEEF. best and most. oe erent ner eerosiiel “Stock” for Soups, Ete. one p pound oquals 4 pounds of prime jean Beef. Bend of receipts! showing ase “of ARMOUR'S: EXTRACT 10 5 in'Soups and Sauces. ARMOUR & & CO., Chicago. ED. L. HUNTLEY’S Suni FOR MEN. rive universal satist ‘Why should you pay middlemen’s profits when you, can an buy dlvee from aa he aamutactares} Te tad eae You or reued Your money." Rakes for mess to ‘your ‘ules for meas- = it ure, OFEr vest. close up under arms: waist measui re ove! at waist, and inside leg measure from rotch, to heel. Send Six Cente for 12 ‘samples of our $10 Men Suits {ashion plate and tape meamire, Wholesale ‘Tailors, 184 E. Madison St., Chicago, I) When writing mention Junce. WE MAKE THE CIGAR YOU 0 MARE THE SMOKE. Tiger Cubana s3i3 ssi terneat ,OURFERE SONS sso chameerese Ny. GINSUMPTION <AfF KOSS, st YORK BACILLICIDE CO. Llang Dep], 155W. 380 Sta N.Y, Ra, uber ante Hearts Dre jor of loly Trinit b iy ry of Jersey City ight say, unquestionably PILL >. A crise atthe can = hoy all ug rT a eae DE. P. A DEANE & CO., CATSKILL, N. ¥. LIKE A GOOD TEMPER, “SHEDS A BRIGHTNESS EVERYWHERE.” “IMPROVEMENT THE ORDER OF THE AGE. THE se ee aati: HE SMITH, PREMIER, TYPEWMITEIE has been ad ERMA! crt 0 THE SHIFT KEY SYSTEM RELEGA fed to the exclusion of all other ‘ATE OF NEW YORK to rs than on) TED toa PAST AGE. Pe Tae MENTS. iter users have been waiting for IMPROVE] THE SMITH PREMIER TYPEWRITER COMPANY, Send for Illustrated Catalogue. 9 Broad wa: hint Sie Sep Philadelphia, Pa.; +: Syracuse, N. Y., U.S. A. Monroe ts, Denver. Col; 11 Bast Haltimore Joodward ave., Detroit, Mich, comicbooks.com