Judge — April 4, 1891 — page 15: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

CARL PRETZEL’S PHILOSOPHY. Hooman lips can never dook a taste of vat mankind vas called pure choy. Vhen you elefate habbiness too.high ub, it makes foolishaess mit you und vas kill itself also, Passion don'd vas a pooty goot friendt. such a row ub, dot he don'd can hear der woice of reason. It is the man that never advertises who discovers that he gets more dust on his goods than in his cash drawer. — Yonkers Statesman, >) ype ed of proofs FREE. Sold only by F. Hiscox, 863 Broadway, New York. WE BELIEVE WE ARE JUSTIFIED IN THE CLAIM THAT JUDGE 1s PERUSED BY | OVER ONE MILLION PEOPLE | | A WEEK. | A QLANCE AT OUR CAREFULLY EDITED ADVERTISING PAGES WILL CONVINCE INTELLIGENT MEN THAT \F THEY PRESS THEIR AD. IN JUDGE IT WILL DO THE REST. Aoverriina MAKAGER, WILLET F. COOK. JUDGE PUB. CO., NEW YORK. Sexo FOR eAMPLE COMES OF JuDOE AX JUDGE'S LieaARy AND our | LaresT b00x ““suoce FoR youRseur." JUDGE'S LIBRARY AND MAGAZINE OF FUN. BEST humorous aggregation for the mon- ey extant. When you are weary from travel or other cause, invest ten cents in a Jupce Lisrary and be happy. We commend Jupce Lisrary MAGAZINE as an advertising medium without a superior. WEST SHORE RAILROAD, (N.Y. C. & H. R. R. R. Co., Lessee.) The Picturesque Route for Business and Pleasure Travel —Via— West Shore of World-famed Hudson River, and Through the Mohawk Valley. THROUCH TRAINS —WITH— Fast Service for Albany, Utica, Syracuse, Rochester, Buffalo, Niagara Falls, Toronto, ‘Detroit, Chicago, St. Louis, and all points west Magnificent sleeping and drawing-room cars on all through Uyaing For tickets, timetables, ‘and information regarding West Shore Railroad call on or address H. B. Jaco, Gen Eastern Passenger Agent, 363 Broadway, New York, or C. E. Lasnrr, General Passenger Agent, 5" Vanderbilt Avenue, New York. BF Write Jor copy of “Suburban Times.” issued monthly. He vas kick | ee oe Ukrenbare | “Fountain” MAY aE: THE AMERIC. ‘The “Camel” Pocket Penholder, Tavatuable tu business mer In 81 boxes of 72 pens. Assorted box of pens (6 sorts) 35 cents. nine, price a5 cts, val MAD FROM ALL STATIONERS OR AN NEWS CO., NEW YORK, THE STORY OF URIAH. Jack Barrett went to Quetta Because they told him to. - He left his wife at Simla. . On three-fourth his monthly screw ; Jack Barrett died at Quetta Ere the next month's pay he drew. Jack Barrett went to Quetta. He didn’t understand | The reason of his transfer | From the pleasant mountain land ; { “The season was September, And it killed him out of hand. Jack Barrett went to Quetta, And there gave up the ghost, Attempting two men's duty In that very healthy post ; | And_ Mrs. Barrett mourned for him i Five lively months at most. Jack Barrett's bones at Quetta Enjoy profound repose : But I shouldn't be astonished If now his spirit knows The reason of his transfer From the Himalayan snows, And when the last great bugle call ‘Adown the Hurnia throbs ; When the last grim joke is entered In the big black book of jobs, And Quetta graveyards give again Their victims to the air, T shouldn't like to be the man Who sent Jack Barrett there. —Rudyard Kipling. We hate to see girls throw kistes, "The average girl is such a thundering bad shot.—Binghamion Leader. It's a bad idea to lock the stable door after the horse is stolen. What if the thief should repent and bring back the horse?— Binghamton Leader. “T cannot permit not bring strangers into the kitchen rangers ? Why, Mr. Locust’s not a stranger! I knew him before he got on the police force."—Philadelphia Times. qupGE, readers all want “The Accessible.” ratented and made of best material, Just right for your clothes of samples Easy to opetMes cheur and: best prices; ACCESSIBLE. circutar an ; EXTENSION CASE CO., 1; Sycamore St., Worcester, Masa. You can here get more life insur. ance, of a better quality, on easier terms, at less cost than elsewhere. ‘Address, 921-3-5 Chestnut St., Philadelphia, ‘Bend $2.25, $2.10 of $8.0 for a retail Bear By exprees tp west. of New inh CANDY Seesre: in the World, ‘Bultable for presenta. Itonce. Nite yy r BA BUNrHER,Coutectioner 419 state 8e-Chicage GEDN RENNNNNNNENEESTOW EL CO, Charlestown, Mase 65, | SVHE PLEASANT VALLEY WINE COMPANY. RHEIMS, STEUBEN CO., NEW YORK. | [THIS 4s the finest Champagne pro~ duced in America, and compares favorably with European vintages. A Natural, Genuine Cham- pagne, fermented dn the bottle, two years being required to perfect the wine, Our Stoget and Dry Catawba and Port are, Hike all our ‘wines, mad: from selected grapes, and ‘are Pure Wines, For Prices, Address as Above. INVEST! INVEST!! Now is the time to mage money in Superior and Duluth prop- erty. Persons either of large or small means seeking invest- ment should write for maps and full particulars to E. W. HARVEY, WEST SUPERIOR, WISCONSIN. 1S PRINTED WITH JUDGE nusian Btack Ink. SIGMUND ULLMAN, 38 PEARL ST..N.Y Moderate EISSHER PRICES, GRAND, UPRIGHT AND SQUARE. , TO RENT, INSTALLMENTS, AND EXCHANGED, Fifth Avenue, cor. {6th Street, New York. VARICOCELE 9i'cr rowan, Woobvs, CONN IE YOU like “JUDGE,” which has | ong since reached FIRST PLACE in the race of ILLUSTRATED NEWSPAPERS, GIVE AN ORDER TO YOUR NEWSDEALER and have it delivered to your home every week. The “JUDGE” appreciates your patronage and is just as well pleased if you leave order with the newsdealer as if you send it direct. His policy is “Live and let live.” FLgas & RIDGE PRINTING Co., FIFTH AVENUE, NEW YORK. comicbooks.com