Judge, 1891-03-14 · page 5 of 16
Judge — March 14, 1891 — page 5: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page from *Judge* (a late 19th-century satirical magazine) contains multiple brief humorous sketches mocking social conventions and contemporary life. **Key content includes:** - **"A Safe Statement"**: Police-court humor about a repeat offender claiming he hasn't left jail in five years - **"The Day We Celebrate"**: Irish stereotype jokes about St. Patrick's Day (green dress, orange-blossoms) - **Restaurant sketches**: Comic situations involving waiters, patrons, and service mishaps - **"How They Entertained Him"**: Racist caricatures depicting Black attendees at a formal ball, using degrading dialect and stereotypes The page's humor relies heavily on ethnic stereotyping—particularly anti-Irish and racist content—reflecting period attitudes. The sketches target working-class characters, domestic servants, and minorities. The satirical intent appears aimed at absurd social situations rather than political critique, though the stereotyping is pervasive and offensive by modern standards.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
ROSES. the wine flowed free ; There was sound. of laughter and mirth, there were perfumes and glee; But, filling his glass to another, in secret my love drank to me, ‘The roses drooped in the heat, the jest ran free ; My love, tossing back froth for foam, from the roses snatched three ; And, covering his flight with their laughter, he brought them in secret to me. KATHRINE GHOSJEAN. x A SAFE STATEMENT. [NA POLICE-courT. “How many times have you been sentenced before, prisoner?” “I don't ‘zackly ‘member, yer honor, but I'm sure the last time was over five years ago.” * How so?” “Cause, yer honor, I hain’t been outer jail since.” A NEEDED INNOVATION. Gentleman in the front row (witnessing performance of Fedora) —“ Hullo! what's the matter on the stage? Everything's stop- ped !—may be fire!” Manager (appearing) — The curtain will fall in one moment, but we have introduced a slight intermission before the death scene to enable gentlemen to put on overcoats.” THE DAY WE CELEBRATE. MY NORA has a dress of green, It's either silk or satin; And well she knows, the little queen, ‘That now it comes quite pat in, OFF COLOR. Querieis— Why don't you get married on the seventeenth ?” Rustieus —" Because the girl is Irish, and nothing could induce her to wear orange-blossoms on St. Patrick’s day.” WHEY should lottery schemes be con- trary to law? For, whoever may win, it is only a GrieveLey PROPRIETOR — GaieveLey (who haz been waiting half an hour to give kis order)—" Not much. I only’ wanted to know if there was any other waiter at this table excepting myself.” A SOLILOQUY. Miss ANTIQUE (af Aer toilet) —** With all thy false I love thee still.” POOR ATTENDANCE. ‘Are you the proprietor of this restaurant 7” Yes: sir. What can I do for you?” WOULD TAKE NO RISKS. ‘C\VELL sir, I have every confidence in you, but can your partner be trusted in so important a transaction?” “My dear sir, he’s that cautious he wouldn't set fire to a rum omelette without first having it insured.” TEMPTING PROVIDENCE. Giles —* Did that Irish dinner end up in a row?” Merritt "Yes. Everything was going on nicely when a waiter was fool enough to bring on a bottle of wine with a yellow label.” CAUSE FOR JOY. NOW Biddy, thinking of her Pat, Invites the good man over ; She puts a shamrock in his hat And makes him feel in clover. WHEY women detest serpents well I see, For is it not professional jealousy? HOW THEY ENTERTAINED HIM. FLOOR-MANAGER (af the White Duck Club ball) —"* We'se gotter new game heah, Mistah Ropes. It’s called ‘grab de bag.’ P'raps yo'd laik ter try him.” ASSISTANT FLOOR-MANAGER —‘‘ A coon dat'll go ter a nimfohmal ball wiv a Gress-suit onter him orter be floured !” comicbooks.com