Judge — December 20, 1890 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

CARL PRETZEL'S PHILOSOPHY. Dhere vas much plaindy fellers dot vill find fault in der most obscoorious places. Der feetshteps of der transgressor vas awful hard | dill he gets into Canada ofer. Der habits of vimmens vas der too noomerous text ov plaindy ministers confersations in der poolpit. It Fadder ‘Time shufiles pooty vell der cards ub, but it don’d vas efery feller dot_can traw himself der right bower out, When Baby was sick, we gave her Castoria, When she was a Child, ahe cried for Castoria. When she became Miss, ahe clung to Castoria, ‘When she had Children, ahe gave them Castoria. 'm a stranger about these parts, new barber who was undecided as to which side he should comb the customer's hair.— Yonkers Statesman, explained the No Christmas and New Year's table should be with- out a bottle of Angostura Bitters, the world-renowned appetizer of exquisite flavor. Beware of counterfeits, “Just see that trombone player. His face is red as a beet from blowing hard.” ‘* Yes ; he certainly ought to know what is meant by strains of music.”—Boston Herald. Salvation Oil, the great pain-annihilator, is the staple liniment. Price, only 25 cents. The effect of Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup is most soothing. ‘The price is only 25 cents. “There's this much,” Sara Bernhardt said As witty paragraphs she read ; “Though slightness may my beauty mar, ‘These jokes in thinness pass me far.” — Washington Post, ASK FOR Packer's Tar Soap The {deal for Toilet, Bath and Shampoo. It pos- sesses hygienic qualities not found in any other soup, and has, for years, enjoyed the preference of physicians, 25 .cents: All Druggists. Their Name is Legion. THE GREAT RUMBER of those who have been wearing * Espenscheid’s Hats” ¢ver since the establishment has been in existence, unanimously agree in pronouncing them “the dest that can be made,” notwith- standing the fact that the prices are lower than usually charged for such high class hats. _ Agencies through- ‘out the United States, or send direct to headquarters, 118 Nassau St., New York City, for dMustrated cireular, directions haw to Order ‘fHE CELEBRATED Prawos Ace at present tho Most Popular and Preferred by Leading Artist, Warerooms, 149, 151, 153, 155 East 14th St., W.Y. SOHMBE & COn | Cmca 26S 1 Saw Francisco, Cal Gytengos Tatas 296 State Street Samy Olive Streets Kanna City, Mo. 1133 Main Strect. “ONTOPAGAN” THE Newest Collar ixTRODUCED BY ™E MANUYACTURER o THe STANLEY AND EMIN PASHA. Mr. Stanley, in his description of finding Emin Pa- sha, says, ‘We celebrated our meeting in some of Mumm’s best, which had been carefully treasured for the occasion.” ‘This is a deserved tribute to the excel- lence of G. H. Mumm & Co's Extra Dry, held in such high favor by connoisseurs throughout the world for its excellence and purity. Some philosopher has hit it off about right in the con- clusion that at twenty we know, at thirty we think we know, and at forty we give it up. BOKER'S BITTERS since 1828 acknowledged to be by far the best and finest Stomach Bitters made, wheth- er taken pure or with wines or liquors or other cordials. Any noted frontier scout who is not credited with ing more Mexicans and Indians than any other man can learn of something to his advantage by ad- ing the nearest dime museum.—St. Joseph News. Mrs, Winstow’s SootHinc Syrup for Children Teething ; soothes the child, softens the gums, allays all pain, cures wind colic and diarrhoea, “25 cents a The church is dying of fastidiousness. We shed tears for the woes of the world on hundred-dollar hand- kerchiefs, and then drop pennies into the poor-boxes. We yearn to help the poor and the oppressed, but we beg to be excused from touching hands whose finger- | nails are in mourning for departed soap.— 7. De Witt Talmage. ENNSYLVANIA TOURS! TO THE Affording a visit of THREE WEEKS in CALIFORNIA. Superbly Appointed Train Of Pullman Vestibule Drawing-Room, Sleeping, Smoking, Counterpart of the Pennsylvania Limited. FEBRUARY 7, (891. Dates of Starting, ; Manon 20, 1901. APRIL 14, 1891. Hide, Pasadenas Santa Barbara, Monterey, and SestVoan He, ia, Baltimore, and Washington, $275.00 FOR THE FIRST, SECOND, AND THIRD, AND TOURIST AGENT AND CHAPERON ACCOMPANY THE PARTY, For itinerary conralning fell information address GEO, W. CHAS. E. PUGH, |. R. WOOD, General Manager. Gen'l Passenger Agent, GOLDEN CATE, THE TOURISTS TRAVEL BY A Done. Sodais taser, See, Se MARCH 3, 1891. EXCURSION TICKETS, sesite.t" neste Hamilton), from New York.” Philadelphia, $300.00 FOR THE FOURTH. BOYD, Assistant Gener ;nger Agent, Philadelphia, Pa, HOTEL Overlooking Central Fark, Fifth Avenue, 58th and Both sts., New York. Highest Ge. Absolutely FIRE-PROOF CS On American and European Plans. Within half block 6th Ave. Elevated R, R. terminus, 5th Ave, Stages and Cross Town Cars pass doors. Graves (gloomily) —“* This is a hard world, isn't it?” Merriman—" That depends altogether on whether you fall on a brick sidewalk or a feather bed."—Zorel! When men are as good as their obituaries and women are’as good as the men think they are the recording angel in heaven can take his long-needed vacation.— Atchison Globe. The Christmas number of Frank Leslie's Illustrated Necspaper is a handsome issue typographically and pictorially, and, reflects great credit on its enterprising publishers. —WVew York Tribune, Edith (soliloquizing) —"" I'm so glad he propoges by letter. No fuss, no helping him on, and plenty of time to run down to papa's office and look him up in Brad- Sicet_ before “1 give him an answer.”—"Aunscy's Weekly, ARMOURS EXTRACT BEEF. ‘The best and most economical tor Soups, Sauces, Beef Tea, Eto. ARMOUR & CO., Chloago; Sole Mfrs. | =10— CENTS PACKAGE ‘An all-tobaceo, Long Filler Cigarette, the most delicious and wholesome smoke ever offered for the money. CONSOLIDATED CIGARETTE Co, ‘Ave. D and soth St., New York. e VASELINE. e ‘OR ONE DOLLAR sent us by mail, we will deliver, free of all charges, to any person in the United States, ail the following articles carefully packed io a neat box ‘One two-ounce bottle of Pure Vaseline..........10 cts. One two-ounce bottle of Vaseline Pomade ‘One jar of Vaseline Cold Cream One cake of Vaseline Camphor Ice One cake of Vaseline Soap, unscent One cake of Vaseline Soap, scented One two-ounce bottle of White V: Or for stamps any single article at the price. I you have occasion to use Vaseline in any form be careful to accept only genuine goods put up by us in original packages. A great many druggists are trying to persuade buyers to take VXSELINE put up by them. Never yield to such persuasion, as the article is an imitation without value, and will not give ‘you the result you expect. A bottle of Blue Seal Vaseline is sold by all druggists at ten cents. CHESEBROUGH M'PG. CO., 24 STATESt., NEW YORK. THE NEW WEBSTER In Attractive Bindings, . . Best Holiday Gift zg m o £ 3 ; 3 WEBSTER'S <& @ | INTERNATIONAL oo DICTIONARY = 3 = & 3 a . Suse: ‘Webster's International Diction: Rerision haa been in. for over 10 Years, More than 100 editorial Inbore PISO'S C Best Cough Medicine. Cures where all else fails, 25CTS Recommended Ey cians Piccsnct aed aeeeoate to the taste, Children take it without objection. By druggists. CONSUMPTION URE FOR SLI G2 comicbooks.com