Judge — October 18, 1890 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE ERIN IN HUNGER. A WAGER. OU: ERIS, fair Erin, we listen in vain 6¢\\/HO was that man who To catch the sweet notes that once fell from wrote ‘Water, water thy lyre. everywhere, but not a drop to ‘Thy melodies now have the wailing of pain, drink?*" ‘And ashes have hidden thy bright altar fire. “I dunno; but I'll bet he Thy harp's diapason so wide in its sweep was either a Kentucky major or From laughter and joy to abasement and tears, _a Missouri general.” Like thy gales that dance or thy waters that weep, With laugh or with moan thou hast rounded the” PUTTING ON A GOOD Shes) FACE. S joy seems invented When I hear him boast : Man's the least contented ‘When he has the most. And where gleams the white of memorial stones 1 On battle-fields honored in story or song, H But fame calls above them in reverent tones ‘The names of thy children, tried, valiant and strong. SSE “AN UNFORTUNATE CATCH. ‘Thy poesy breathes in the ballads of earth ; CORRECTED. Te suermaeD _ resueawan — TU be Thy jests lend a laugh as we toil through the years, Per Reon Kicked if, that the biggest cel Full as ready thy sigh over perishing worth, ke BS RA eter ED ¥ Thy fountain of mirth’s.near thy fountain of tears, Was R.SOOU an ae 5 : Sympathetic friend —"You must cheer up, Emily. There are as good fish in the sea as ever were caught.” Young widow —1 know it; but (burst of tears) John wasn't a fish.” THE SAME RULE OUGHT TO APPLY. Young mother —" What ought the baby’s food to be, Doctor Chargem ?” Doctor —" Nothing but the milk from one cow.” Young mother —“And 1 believe you said the mother ought to take four or five fresh-eggs every day?” Doctor —" Yes. Young mother —"Well, doctor, should they be eggs from one hen?” AT SOME.OTHER MARK. Aunty May (with horfor)—“ Charley, is it possible I heard you ‘swear, you wicked boy? Don’t you know the angels are listening to every word you say?” Charley (calmly) —“Well, what if they are? I ain't swearing at them.” NOT TO BE TOLERATED. Boston mother —*What -are’ you doing, Charlotte?” Little girl— Playing tag, mamma.” : Boston mother —“Come into the house this instant! The idea of playing such a common game with your*hew eye-glasses on.” . ANXIOUS FOR THE DIADEM. Queen Victoria—" Albert. Edward, you're too cross to-day to talk to. Prince of Wales (significantly) —" No cross no crown.” But Erin, fair Erip, where’er thou hast trod The wail of thy woe is not uttered in vain ; ‘The sweet flowers of pity that spring from the sod Shall wrap the cold ‘links of thy poverty’s chain. ALT, wonDax, A RUDE .WITNESS. Rex. Me. THOSTLE (finishing an’ extempore marriage service) —"* An' now whad d’ *Lawd's jined t'gedder ‘luff nuffin’ spread asundah ! SHE WAS PROPER. C+LET'S go over to the grocery,” said a six-year-old < boy to a five-year-old girl, “and get a stick of candy.” - “'Notyubiless .I can secure a chaperone, Jamies,” replied the little maid. a BUT PERHAPS I'D. WISH*I HADN'T! SOMETIMES When I listen to various. folks Bewailing the faults of.a friend, ~ °, And wishing their cherished acquaintances shad j-More qirtues the good might ¢ommend ; {Sometimes whenI mark their sarcastical smiles For those who af€ dear to their. hearts, * And see the sharp poiits of the critical words ‘That tip conversational darts ; Sometimes when I notice, how presence restrains That candor which absence sets free I yearn to remain a while after I've gone, To learn what is thought about me. ‘& BRIGHT “OUTLOOK: Chorus. of the Vassar girls—" Every day be Chewsday by-and-by.” 5 ~ comicbooks.com