Judge — September 20, 1890 — page 11: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

JUDGE 387 A dark investment—Buying coal.—Shoe Recorder. ‘The summer-resort hammock is bagging in the back. —Chicago Inter-Ocean. Trifles light as hair sometimes turn the whole course of a man's appetite.—.Vew York News. When Baby was sick, wo gave her Castoria When she was a Child, she cried for Castoria. When she became Miss, she clung to Castoria. When she had Children, she gave them Castoria, When a man comes back from the country and talks forever about the fun he had you may rest assured that he will not go to the same place next year.—ew York Herald. Profestor—* To prove that the ears of grasshoppers are in their legs a very simple experiment will suffice. Place one on the table and knock on the table ; he will jump off. Now cut off his legs and repeat the experi ment and you will find that he will not jump. Q. E. D."—Fliegende Blatter. Mrs, Wiystow’s SootHina Syrup for Children ‘Teething ; soothes the child, softens the gums, allays all pain, cures wind colic and diarrhaca, “25 cents a bottle. Mr. Powderly found himself standing in front of a weighing-machine the other day, mechanically reading the inscription on the same.“ Drop one cent in the slot and ascertain your exact weight,’” he repeated absently . T guess T won't do it, I don’t want to ascertain it. ‘Tthink I've fallen off about four tons in the last two weeks !"—Chicago Tribune, ‘DECKER: z BROTHERS | MATCHLESS H PIANOS 33 UNION SQUARE. NEW YORK. -10— CENTS PACKAGE, An all-tobacco, Long Filler Cigarette, the most delicious and wholesome smoke ever offered for the money. CONSOLIDATED CIGARETTE CO, ‘Ave. D and roth St., New Yori. The Correct “NEW YORK STYLES" in GENTLEMEN'S HATS for “FALL,” issued by N. ESPENSCHEID, Salesroom, 118 Nassau St, NEW YORK. ENS gona BES Ta in the market. 5 nd postal tor order Blank & prices, NEWT YORK. Agencies throughout tho United States, “CONDENSED AND DRY. The Imperial Ivory for Photogra- DAY’S gers the Howell 22° teeta DIAMOND Paste, “Add water and it is ready for PASTE use. DIAMOND PASTE CO., 93 Barclay St., New York. 156 State St., Boston, FACTORY, ALBANY, N. ¥. 4:.1"¢ BARKER BRAND “fF LINEN COLLARS SOLUT ELY BE ST, First boy (to second boy, who has been fishing)— “Catch anything?” Second boy—"*T haven't been home yet."— Racket, Neither the walking delegate nor the paid agitator was ever known to get dissatisfied with his job and strike.— Binghamton Republican, That “* great metropolitan journal,” the Chicago 7rid- une, has started a prize-ballot scheme. Papers, how- ever, have been known to succeed by purely newspaper methods. A good newspaper is prize enough for any man's money.— St, Paul Pioneer Press. Boker's Bitters since 1828 acknowledged to be by far the best and finest Stomach Bitters made, whether taken pure or with wines or liquors AND OTHER CORDIALS. The youthful king of Spain is as fly as any American kid. When he eschewed knife and fork at a recent luncheon his attendant observed gravely, “Sire, kings never eat with their fingers.” ‘* This king does,” re- sponded his majesty, continuing his meal.— Waterbury American. Mabel—"* What a perfectly exquisite new bonnet, dearest!" Ethel—"* Ob, I'm so glad you like it! T was so afraid you wouldn't! Are you sure you like it?” Mabel—" Sure? Oh, perfectly!” I always did adore that shape, Why, I had three just like it—when it was in fashion." — Lowell Mail, THE KAISER'S FAVORITE Champagne is ‘Cabinet Sekt,” of Kloss & Foerster, Freyburg. Thomsen & Co, 87 Wall st., sole agents. Robby (ax the breakfast table.) —"*Clara, did Mr. Spooner take any of the umbrellas or hats from the hall last night?" Clara —* Why, of course not ; why should he?” Bobby —" That's what I'd like to know. I thought he did, ‘cos I heard him say when he was going out, “I'm going to steal just one,’ and —why, what's the matter, Clara?"— Boston Herald, Teacher (to pupil in juvenile history class) Willie, you remember what I have told the battle of Waterloo, do you?” Teacher —* Who won the battle?" Willie—’ The juke of Wellington.” Teacher —"* Who came to his assistance and helped him to win it?" Willie—""A feller named Upgardson Atom."—Chicago Tribune, Now, u_ about Willie—"* Yes'm.” HE NEW HOW ‘most magnificent hotel i European plans. + of Cleveland, Ohio, is the the west. American and Brace up, dear boy ; do something worth mentioning and you will not be forgotten. Don't be a tramp and then growl because your genius is unrecognized. Hitch your wagon to a star—there are plenty of stars wait- ing to be caught and harnessed—and then make good time in the general race. Our word for it, you will lose your taste for Byronic melancholy and want to live for- ever on this rumbling, strong-gaited, laughter-loving and happiness-giving planet. Mrs, Blinks is a pleasant, mild-mannered little woman, who is almost heartbroken over the fact that her hus- band is addicted to the use of profanity.‘ Why don't you swear back at him” said her sister one day, ‘I couldn't do anything like that, said Mrs, Blinks."” But her sister is a woman with much force of character, and succeeded in exacting a promise that this rigorous method would be tried. Mr. Blinks came hom and not in a very amiable mood, glanced over the table disgusted! slimmest meal I ever saw I be d—. John,” rejoined “Mrs. Blinks meekt Post. Mrs. Wickwire—"\f you go first you will wait for me on the other shore, won't you, dear?” Mr. Wick wire—"*1 suppose so. I never went anywhere yet without having to wait for you at least half an hour."— Terre Haute Express. Yes, a most remarkable cat. We've now had it ten years, ‘and of course it's too old to catch rats or mice ; but whgt do you think it did? Our boy brought home a sign marked ‘admittance free” from somewhere and the other night we caught the cat with that sign trying to fix it on the rat-trap so as to drum up business and catch custom.—Philadelphia Times, “Throw physic to the dogs,” and use Angostura Bit- ters for good digestion and a healthy appetite. Sole M'frrs, Dr. J. G. B, Siegert & Sons. Ask your druggist. Mrs, Smiter— y child, my dear Mrs. Proudfoot !" Mrs. Proudfoot —"* We are very proud of him, Mrs. Smiler." Afrs, Smiler —"' He is so bright and’ active and energetic. If Mr. Smiler were here that awful man would say that he promised to be ‘ full of sand.'" Mrs. Proudfoot—" Dear, dear! I'm awfully afraid of it myself. It takes all my time to keep him from swallowing the beach." —Chicago Times, NEW KODAKS. “You press the button, we do the rest.” SEVEN NEW STYLES AND SIZES, ALL LOADED WITH TRANSPARENT FILMS. For Sale by all Photo, Stock Dealers THE EASTMAN COMPANY, Send for Catalogue, ROCHESTER, N.Y. THE CELEBRATED PIANOS ‘Aro at present the Most Popular and Preferred by Leading Artists, Warerooms, 149, 151, 153, 155 East 14th St., N.Y. SOHMER & CO. 136 State Street; San Francisco, Cat., Union ‘St. Louis, Mo., 1522 Olive Street; Kansas Crry, Mo., 1133 Maia Street. PEABODY 4NO SAMPLE By MAIL 25 SHOULD BE IN EVERY HOM JUST THE THING FOR A HOLIDAY PRESENT. For sale by Booksellers and Toy and Fancy Goods Dealers, or ‘Sent free on recespt of one dollar. E. I. HORSMAN, PUBLISHER, 80 AND 82 WILLIAM STREET, NEW YORK. AL, PARIS, 1878. W. BAKER & €0.S Breakfast Cocoa 7a ers eobdies No Chemicals fare used In its preparation. It has more han tires times the strength of Cocoa mized with Starch, Arrowroct or Sugar, fand le therefore far more economical, | couing tse than one cent a cup. Tt bs Sciiclous, nourtching, strengthening, Ea i for invalids as well as persons in health. rymhere, SLY DiGEaTED, and admirably edapted W. BAKER & CO, Dorchester, Mass.