Judge, 1890-06-14 · page 10 of 16
Judge — June 14, 1890 — page 10: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page collects humorous sketches satirizing American social life. The main illustrated piece, "To Amabel," mocks romantic poetry by depicting a man attempting to woo a woman in a grimy industrial city—replacing traditional pastoral imagery (birds, streams, violets) with urban realities (garbage men, hand organs, the "L" train). The satire contrasts genteel romantic conventions with unglamorous city life. Additional brief jokes mock legal absurdities ("Miss-Fit"), Mexican social customs ("A Slow Affair"), and class pretensions. "Military Terms" uses weaponry metaphors to satirize marriage, while "The Western Mode" ridicules Midwestern directness and informality. "Biblical Information" jokes about a child's innocent misunderstanding of scripture. The illustrations use exaggerated caricature typical of period satirical magazines. Overall, the page reflects Judge's focus on urban American manners, regional differences, and the gap between social pretense and reality.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
TO AMABEL. ERE in the warm and moiling city How shall I woo my Amabel? How shail my am'rous muse, pray tell, Pen her a suitable loveditty ? . No birds nor streamlets to bestrew it, Nor buttercup nor violet, Zephyrs nor woodland bowers. Yet Somehow or other I must do it! “Hi, Amabel! open your casement. The sun climbs o'er the chimney-iops, And breakfast-odors—ham or chops— Steal to me gently from the basement. “The house-maid cleans the window:glasses “Oh, Amabel! the morn is beaming ; And sweets the front stoop; or so be The earth rejoices, nature wakes Flirts with the iceman lightsomely, The garbage-man the ashes takes ‘Smirks as the early truckman passes. “Teatch the L trains’ distant roaring, The yellow horse-cars jingle near, And eke a hand-organ I hear In mellow cadence sinking, soaring. “The sparrows froli Savagely sound: s yell; The huckster whoops. Oh, Amabel, Open your second-story shutte EMA A. OFF: MISS -FIT. TAILOR sued a customer For not paying a bill long due ; ‘The defendant proved he was non- suited, So the plaintiff was non-suited too, A SLOW AFFAIR. *+FJOW did you enjoy the ball?" was asked of a pretty senorita in Mexico, “It was tame; very tame,” she replied; “not at all like we used to have.” DOWN THE RIVER. “To what do you attribute that condition of affairs?" SECOND MATE: (0/ fhe: Bele a “Oh, senor! there were but Memphis"—" Fo’ U one dem rousta- bouts 's gamblin’ agin. I heah d’ dices™ seven men killed during the whole evening.” PROGRESS. ERE'S nothing like a western town for progress,” remarked otter, “Yes,” said Talbot. “I saw an in- stance of it while in Colorado. A man given ten hours to Icave the town and he took just five minutes.” MILITARY TERMS. WAS an officer, a most Kedoubtable commander, But met a pretty girl and was Unable to withstand her. And so I joined her company , And oh, howitzer changes A soldier when a single life For married he exchanges! ‘That girl—she’s always in for war, Looks daggers over trifles, And when I'm fast asleep at night My pocket-book she rifles. At military balls she lets Young officers revolver, And yet so fascine-ating is That even T absolve her. When I objected to the cost, In tones that made me shako She said that she would haversack— A seal-skin, latest make-o. And now (of course she'll have her way ; Whole armies couldn't block it') She's put me over infantry, And says that I must rocket. Coolly the street-sprinkler is streaming. A TRIFLE PARTICULAR. Miss WarrLeson —“' Did yo" sen’ me dat buckay, Mistah Peedles?” Mr. PEeDu Thad d’ honah, Miss Louey. son —"*Well, d’ nex’ time I hopes yo'll be gonnlemanly *ter put in hummin’-birds in place ob ants." THE WESTERN MODE. AT VASSAR, Teacher in deportment —" Now, Miss Breezy, suppose you wanted some butter at the table and nobody noticed your want of it, what would you say?” Miss Breezy (of St. Louis)—"Say? I wouldn't say anything. I'd just get up and get what oleomargarine I wanted and tra-la-la back ta my seat. I guess you're not up in St. Louis manners.” BIBLICAL INFORMATION. Sunday-school teacher —* Who wrote the epistle to the Hebrews?” Little Mabel — Paul, ma‘am.” Sunday-school teacher —" That is right. Now wasn't he called Saul at one time?” Little Mabel—"Yes'm. That was his name before he was married.” ue ii ij | _L_ TN i fh ing ——— Te EAA ih SIZING THE SITUATION. Miss Brrerton (breaking the engagement)—"' 1 hope sincerely that T never shall see you again ™ Mr. Co1we1t.—" Those are my sentiments exactly” (7vey part.) Tommy Bancs (playing ball) —"* Over th’ fence is out, fellers™* comicbooks.com