Judge — January 25, 1890 — page 7: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

257 PLYNLYMMON HOUSE, LLANGOLLEN-OVER-AGAINST- MACHY! ETH-AND-BEHIND-MOWDDWY, WALES. (With my Waterbury stopped.) UDGE, New York—You will pardon me for skipping a few places of general interest which you had pinned down for me to visit, 7 but I found on leaving Haiderabad that I had just time to catch a BR : —-F# pirate-galleon at Bierat bound for London direct with a cargo of fig-leaves for the British museum, and as my new friend the banker had engaged’ passage for himself and daughter, and the captain had promised to get up a real old Mediterranean auto-da-water to make our trip memorable, I joined the crowd. Everything promised a blood-curdling and exciting voyage, and I was reveling in the anticipation of getting some good sketches of plank-walking, gauntlet-running and yard-arm gymnastics, with a moderate share of banker-daughter rescuing thrown in, when, as luck would have it, the Greek mate read my name and address on the back of my necktie and the whole thing was spoiled. He said he could afford to take no chances of having Mr. Arkell charter the Sam Sloan and go out to meet him, and you never saw a canal- boat have a quicter, more peaceful slide than we had from Bierat to 3 the mouth of the Temz. My companions were as much disappointed as I, and the banker, who had all of a Briton’s hot, unjokable blood, passed the greater part of the time begging the crew to attempt to cut his throat, that he might knock a few of them down and get his name in the Afiiitary Gazette, He dissuaded me from going ashore at Naples, where I wanted to make connection for Switzerland, and invited me to pass Sunday with him on his Welsh estate. There was a stormy, off-shore breeze blowing as we skimmed by the “‘see-it-and-die” city, and I was glad not to stop, although it suggested Mr Sac’s rubber-stemmed pipe on a hot afternoon with a vividness that almost made me homesick. This Wales is a most unique and interesting country. My friend was received by his tenantry with shouts of joy that used up all the /'s and y's in the valley, so that I have had to content myself with simple pens and afs in ordinary conversation. The occupant of an adjoining estate very kindly asked me to stay a year with him and capture types of character. He is a tall man with a white-horse beard run- ning pretty well around his head, and a pair of eyes which flash and scintil- late as he struggles with his native tongue like a couple of well-browned fish-balls in a red finger- bowl. His name is Lllyyy, and he well deserves it. The information which he gave me as to localities at home was startling in its accuracy, and it was hard to believe his state- ment that he had never been in America. He said, among other things, that he had a brother living at the corner’ of Cooper union and Hester avenue in New York, and that his great desire was to get across and enjoy the ice-carnival in New Orleans, Alabama. I joined in the flow of his ideality by telling him that could he see the good old Mexican hospitality of Albany and attend the opera as given at Buxton, Maine, he would never regret the journey by rail in reaching our country, and after taking a parting ’ with him T left him. I shall run over to London to do a little shopping for the boys, and hope to write my next budget on the heaving chest of the broad Atlantic. I leave all details of my reception in your hands, knowing that you will do me justice. If you engage the Chicago auditorium and have it moved over don’t let me know of it beforehand. Yours with increasing respect, Zim, ~ = UNDER THE ManncemenT of Judge “The captain had promised to get up a real old Mediterranean auto-da-water.” DAUGHTERS OF EVE, OF ALL the girls 1 call to mind, From Mary down to "Mandy, There's not a single one, I find, Who said she hated candy. “As we skimmed by the ‘ see-it-and-die' city.” A STUDY OF THE OBSERVING FACULTY IN CHILDREN. A NATURAL SUPPOSITI “I don’t want Chloe to cut my bread, mamma,” said little Boy Blue emphatically ; “her hands are dirty.” “They aren't dirty, dear,” explained his mother; “that’s their natural color.” ““Tisn’t all, mamma,” he persisted, “I know ‘tisn’t all. You can see for yourself where the dirt has rubbed off on the inside.” FRAIDIE’S COMPARISON, “Do you know,” said seven-year-old Fraidie after thoughtfully listening to the undulating notes of a faint, sweet-voiced singer on the street, “do you know that girl's singing reminds me of a last year’s breeze?” Quaint words! Such minds are the delicate organs which the winds of heaven play upon. THE CULTURE OF FOREIGN BIRTH. Miss Inkwire—“And how did you like Paris, Miss Tripper? Miss Tripper —" Oh, it was delightful! I met such charming and cultivated people. Why, even children of three years speak French.” Miss Inkwire, who spent three years in boarding-school in a vain attempt at French, thinks this is a truly native accomplishment. “Very kindly asked me to stay a year with him.” comicbooks.com