Judge — January 25, 1890 — page 4: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

254 HUM OF THE COURT. THOUGHT by Jimm; more New York leg Husted—What will I find to do when there is no lature? A SET of false teeth exploded in Newport the other day, and she wasn't wearing them at the time either. VER three hundred divorces in Philadelphia last year. Hereafter let us hear less about the anti-rapidity of that old town. (OU GET the germs of influenza in greenbacks, and if that doesn’t “ameliorate the affliction you can at least transfer the germs to the doctor. HE AUTHOR of cighty-two. His name w Scotland. GLOVE with a pocket in it is the latest invention for ladies. But it is necessary for the sex to lose something, and therefore they will carry a pocket-book without a pocket in it. THE WINE most liked by Robert Browning was port, Some of his lines indicate that he mixed it with several other and meaner bever- ages and took it straight from the jug. A WESTERN MAN tried to see how long he could stay on a railroad track with an engine advancing upon him, and if he hadn't been run over and killed he might have been there yet HE BIGGEST MAN in New York is Ward McAllister. There is a happy land” has just got there, a Andrew Young, and his other land was prding to the Chicago Herald, Let us discriminate a little. Let us say that the gentleman is the big gest little man, or perhaps the littlest big man, THIRTY monuments to the late Kaiser Wil- liam are in process of con- struction, Grief is sacred, but one gets so tired of paying out money to keep it going that he hasn't strength left to mop his tears, YMOUTH, Pa., has a Woman's protective association, its design be- ing to protect’ women inst’ matrimonial venturers, and it is so successful that its mem- bers’ hearts are breaking day by day ING CARLOS of Portugal is young, handsome and amiable. We should think a thus favored would t long before handi himself with a crown, but he will be just as pretty < AN INDIAN GIR she has slain with her own fair hands. HE HAD GIVEN COLLATERAL. Miss DULGrut (off for Paris to study «ulture) —* Good-bye, mamma !” Mxs. DuLurit—" Good-bye, 3 don't eglect the high notes.” Mk. DULCTH (tho has had hard work to the trip) —"Tshan’t be allowed to.” ping a corpse. wears the teeth of one hundred and fifty elk that If elks’ teeth were di ig as some of our best society. HERE MUST be considerable ice this yea young persons who are | she’ would be as modest and shrin! cor ing the number of One would think ply was exceedingly large. king through it a glance through the newspapers that the s Bit NYE says he occasionally rinses his soul with tears as a result of ading Dickens, ‘The outflow is not large, but liam’s soul is a good one, but it comes in a small pa yeast STATISTICL our y the bald-he scream? BISMARCK has reached the ag fast without losing his breath iron, but he exhi about it. tis sufficient. Wilk c, like compressed N says our yearly production of eggs equals in value ad of and can’t so much as utter a good rly production of iron, Why not celebrate the hen ins Hed bird that does no goo e of toleration because he can't talk He continues to advocate blood and ts some mild curiosity as to what some other man thinks N ITALIAN says you can hire certain of his countrymen here to kill aman for less than one hundred dollars. That is putting the price too high. W to kill for p pay for the privilege. Some of them are bad en thing, and even to JUDGE A VALUABLE SERVITOR. Miss RatHnone—‘* You don’t know what a treasure our new butler is, so respectable and staid.” Cousix Tom (who is very tall) —" He's staid ten minutes already on his last post of duty.” in South Carolina has only to appear in a room where crockery is to make the crockery smash itself in many pieces. Some say it is electricity or psychology; but it might be well to smooth her face with sand-paper. = THE DEATH of Jeff Davis it is found that he was captured at close of the war in nine different ways, by twice that number of men, and in nine different localities. The story is much like Jefferson be- cause it is hard to take. - wom her ma < of color has just discovered that she is free, and has sued pay. It is difficult to believe such storie ¢ two or three persons in this state who still believe in George Pendleton’s civil-service humbug. yet there A BLACK WOMAN presides over a fourth-class post-office in a Louis- iana town, and all the whites in the locality are mad about it. ‘They say that ever since her administration began they have received no letters that didn’t urge them to pay up certain little debi: DJ: HOLMES describes the sensations that come to one year after year as one grows old, The dear boy ought to be permitted to turn around and go back, that he might give us the experience of growing young; but alas! even he is not outwardly built that \ REPLENISHED STUFFING. Mxks. Hotiyniossom —"' Hit’s lucky dl elder’s deef, Claude Keep a kin’ fer ‘bout a minute, Our pillers is gittin” pow'ful thin,” comicbooks.com