Judge, 1889-12-21 · page 16 of 18
Judge — December 21, 1889 — page 16: what you’re looking at
What you’re looking at
This page is primarily **advertisements and filler content** with one notable cartoon story. The main satirical piece is "HIS WIFE'S PRESENT," a humorous domestic sketch about a husband receiving a homemade dressing-gown from his wife Elfleda. The joke plays on **exaggerated sentimentality**: the husband Callithumpian treats the garment with mock-reverent, overwrought emotion ("I think I will try it on. Be calm, my darling"), treating a simple handmade gift as though it were a priceless treasure. The satire mocks both **sentimental Victorian domestic ideology** and the tendency of newlyweds to dramatize ordinary married life. The page's opening section "IN A NUTSHELL" contains brief satirical jibes—one mocking unmarried women's marital advice, another about drunken men at balls, and a dig at the magazine *Time* for being slow-paced. The remainder consists of hotel advertisements, investment company pitches, and product ads (soap, cocoa, olive oil)—typical of *Judge's* era advertising strategy.
📄 Transcribed text from this page (OCR, searchable)
Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.
184 JUDGE. IN A NUTSHELL. It is the unmarried lady who can give her sisters points on the art of how to manage a husband, ‘The ball season is here again and sad to say many a man who goes to a ball gets on a bat before it is over. We suppose the purchasers and subscribers of our amiable and witty contemporary, 7ime, are people who are never in a hurry about anything. ‘They take Zime, you see.—Houston Courier. 6’ NET INCOME 7 he NATIONAL E&DER TAG ENT, moP™ ComPANy. "URE poston, ASS. TornKA, KAN. CAPITAL and SURPLUS, $265,000, Loans Negotiated, $5,126,000, Our 74 First, Morizages.on town or farm propertics, and our 64 Debenture Bonds, amply secured, offer the highest interest Unequaled for conservatism. Directed ‘and. business men. Principal and le in New York. Call or write for 3 of high-grade investment , New York Managers, 135 & 137 Broadway, ConvICTION that the neglected and much-abused article called soup is almost necessary in the every-day. bill-of-fare; that it is wholesome, econ- comical, and, when properly made, delicious, sent me (Marion Harland) in search of methods by which ever the over-wrought mother “who does her own work” may sct a good, nutritous soup on the table daily without ser- fous increase of expense and labor. She found them at our establishment, and if you want to know how and all about it, send to us for her article 01 soup. making, which appeared in a recent issue of Zhe Jlome Maker—free, of ‘Ba- Send uslt centa ta help nay express and receive anample can, your choi The Franco- American Food Co., 42 West Broapway, ‘Mention this paper. ‘ew York, LEADING HOTELS. EW YORK CITY. BREVOORT HOUSE, virrm AvExve (near Washington square) NEW YORK, " 2 __>__ Proprietor. cL GLENHAM, FUT AVENUE (between iat and 22d streets) Rew YORK. N. B, Barry, Proprietor. European Plan. GILSEY OUSE, Comer Broadway and 29th Street, New York J ‘& LRO., Proprietors. GRAND UNION HOTEL, Orvosrre Gaaxp Central. Depot, 42 Sr., looms $1 aday and upwards. Bagizago to cod from Grand Central Depot, free. European Plan. ELER'S HOTEL, Wand ® Marpex axe, Aunany. N.Y. UTICA, N. Y. ST, JAMES HOTEL, Utica, New York, SMITH & PATTEN, Proprietors, Lent & Co.'s Crackers are sold by first-class grocers | everywhere, HIS WIFE'S PRESENT. He Would Wear It although the Whole World Deserted Him, ** Elfleda, something tells me you made this yourself.”” “I did, Callithumpian, I made it with my own hands asa present for you. It’s a dressing-gown.” Mr. Magruder held the present at arm's-length and contemplated it with silent awe. In the six months of his previous career as a devoted young husband he had never been so deeply moved. “When I gaze at the unearthly gorgeousness of this gown, Elfieda,” he said at length, “and the conviction slowly but irresistibly forces its way into my mind that it is intended for me to wear, can you wonder that I hesitate—that I ask myself what { have done to deserve it? Elfleda,” he exclaimed in a hoarse whisper, as he closed the blinds, ‘I think I will try it on. - Be calm, my darling.” “Tam glad you like it, Callithumpian, been so good, so thoughtful, so" — ** Heaven knows I have tried to be, Elfieda !" said the agitated young husband, wiping his fevered brow im- pulsively. ** Which is the—the upper frontier of this— this magnificent garment?” ** Here itis, Callithumpian, But before you put it on, dear, just look at this beautiful design on the right shoulder. Isn't it nicely worked ?” Elfleda, it is absolutely paralyzi “You know what it is, of course “I—I think Ido. It's the hanging of old Brown.” humpian !" wailed the wife. ‘I meant it for the translation of the prophet Elijah ! ‘It will do for either one, Elfleda,” gasped the hus- band, as he struggled frenziedly with the gown. | **I'd wear anything that was made with your own fair hands, my darling,""he continued as he got it on wrong-side- out and hind-side-before, ‘tif it was meant to be Adam and Eve in the garden of Eden and looked like a three- tent circus and menagerie in a tornado. Don't cry, El fieda! I'll wear it now if it costs me every friend in th world. I'd wear it if John Ruskin himself should ask me as a personal favor to take it off. Such love as mine will stand anything. Marriage is not a failure !"—Chi- cago Tribune. You have OF GENERAL PUBLIC INTEREST. Trom "The Doctor's” sketches of prominent dis- plays at American Public Health Exhibition, corner Fulton and Pineapple streets, we quote the followin, A notable exhibit was that’ made by the manufactur ers of “Rex” wheat, a new preparation of positive val- ue as a food, and palatable in the extreme. ‘The wheat of the finest quality is obtained in the central part of New York state. Is an “entire” wheat flour minus the worthless chaff. Roughly speaking, the process of reducing the wheat to flour is by passing it between rollers that are practically in constant contact, But as most people are more interested in results than proc- esses, let us say that it makes a delicious dish in the form of porridge, while it cannot be surpassed for grid- dle-cakes, muffins or bread, for those who have not had their taste completely vitiated by ordinary flour. It is of special excellence as a porridge, as it more than takes the place of oat-meal, which is “hardly fit for human food, especially as it is usually cooked and eaten. Most of us have passed through the same experience of futile attempts to obtain a substitute for oat-meal» hominy, fair for not more than two consecutive mornings ; rice, pallid and mawkish ; cracked wheat, slimy and strong in the suggestion that when we get to the bottom of the dish we shall find the eet poster upon which it has once been spread, wheat, on the contrary, has a good full flavor and is much more easily digested ahd assimilated than oat-meal. Tt can be eaten whether asia porridge, a bread, or a muffin, at the Brooklyn ex- hibition, and’ there is’not the least fear that the judg- ment we have pronounced above upon its merits will be questioned by those who try it there, ‘The urchin who sees the legend ‘* Paint,” Can never pass it by Without putting out his fingers ‘To see if the paint is dry —Boston Courier. A valuable and interesting book is “Great Senators of the United States Forty Vears Ago," with personal recollections of the author, Oliver Dyer.” ‘The book is published by Robert Bonner’s Sons, who have made the Ledger the handsomest and one of the very best papers in this country. ‘There is considerable difference between the sober man and the ‘man who frequently smiles :” but it is the sober man who has the best reason for smiling.— Boston Courier, ‘Beware of limitations. NOTICE AUTOGRAPH OF GRATEFUL—COMFORTING. EPPS'S COCOA BREAKFAST. By a thorough knowledge of the natural laws which govern the operations of digestion and nutrition, and by'a careful ap- lication of the fine properties of well-selected Cocoa, Mr. Epps. provided our breakiast tables with a delicately flavored beverage which may save us many heavy doctor's bills, It is by the judicious use of such articles of diet that a constitution may be gradually built up until strong enough to resist every tendency to disease. Hundreds of subtle maladies are floating around Us ready to attack wherever there isa weak point. We may escape many a fatal ehaft by keeping ourselves well fort fied with pure blood and a properly nourished frame.—" Creit Service Gautte” Made simply with boiling water or milk. Sold only in half. pound tins, by Grocers, labelled thus: JAMES EPPS & Co., Homcopathic Chemists, London, England. ADAMANT, THE INDESTRUCTIBLE WALL PLASTER. No one who wishes to build economically jand well can afford to use anything else. Is of buildings plastered with it within past three years. "Great saving of time in completing building. For circulars and full information address SYRACUSE, N.Y, Avetlon the parse. A CHRistmas CIF T ANOLE PRINTING OUTITT, Compicig and P et Ponre mteewe veh maser and ert “WOW TO omen on eats te iy he Geghs Ayowarted: INCERAOTL ® BRO, €2 Polos 8 W-¥- CXF Cc a Cotadlished 1365. WILLIAM ROEMER, Tronks and Traveling Bags, No. 82 Fifth Avenue, Correr 14th Street, NEW YORK. Mottet’s Olive Oil. ‘The standard of Pority. The pertection of excellence, Used by the bea fatten hare gand tn Karopar 'T7) Weed ad you ei want cA fal Grocers and Bra raviis comicbooks.com