Judge — October 5, 1889 — page 5: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

PASS THE WORD. AID St. Louis to New Vork, You have the world’s fair of 'g2! Good gracious, how you talk ! Ie'll look way over a place like you. Such a one-sided island town To have such a fair of world renown! Are you ready the shekels over to fork ?* Snecred St. Louis to big New York. “Ho! come and ride on my back !" Laughed Chicago, the suburb town. “Tl let you off with a sounding whack You have the world’s fair, indeed ! Do you think the world’s gone to seed? (Or wisdom got on a side-track ? Money? It’s here by the stack." St. L—— on Chicago then turned * Of all the outrageous affairs We ever in any way learned, This takes the top step on the stairs. Why, where would be room for the feet Of your girls if the fair there should meet? Your pond, it would have to be burned, Or the visitors soon‘ would be urned."" And C— was not left in the lurch : A place called St. Louis, we think, Had better come down from the perch Where it has been trying to prink. It's not often heard of, we know, ‘So just for this once let it go; F past any smirch, we shall not search.” Said the Jupce of New York, * How absurd ! All places shone on by the sun Can't have the world’s fair; and we've heard That this is the one only one That's been voted the best in all ways, And that money, you bet, we will raise. 1¢ wind from all quarters is stirred— k! *Juoce, print, Vew York ts he word.” ARISTINE: ANDERSON. WHERE HE PUT HIS FAITH. Long-suffering wife—' Vow do you expect a woman to provide vittals and drink when you don’t bring home no cash Saturday night?” Husband— Why, Mrier, the grocer and the butcher ain't moved, has they?” JUDGE And take that conceit of yours way down. OBJECTED TO A SYNDICATE. Pp HERRINGTON—"' Can't + help a poor blind man ; you jest move on, T ain't formin’ no charity trust t-day. NOT IN THE DICTIONARY. Luck—The trump-card of fools. Strength—The ability to fight against odds. act—The intuitive knowledge of what not to do. Civilization—The evolution of the nose-ring to the ¢: Philanthropy—The charity which swallows up the in the mass. Justice—X blue-coated policeman who is gen end of his beat. A patriot—One who bleeds for his country. A politician —One by whom his country is bled, The future—A jealous god at whose temple we all worship and at whose altar we sacri A friend in ne his heart on one sleeve to be picked at and his pocket-book on the other to be plucked from. ALGERNON TASH, ILLUSION. HEN in that joyful summer-time Through sunny lanes our way we Repeating now and then a thyme Of lovers’ joys and sorrows blended How very light of heart were we, div ally at the other There was no bliss like unto ours! Ah me! now sorry is my look: I'm not as happy as men may be ; T never thought I'd have ta cook, Do chores, msich silk, and hold the baby And so my song is far from gay, Unstrung’s the once so merry lyre, For, too, I rise ere dawn of day To plan and build the morning fire HIS COMMENT. Uneix THomas—" Elsie #s broadenin’ out some, ain't she?" Mamata—'‘ It seems to me that Eloise and that young Mr. Wentby are getting a bit too thick.” and ma wants me to WANTED BY HIS MOTHER. Tommy —"Come on out ‘np John} Johnny — Tommy home fer? Joknny—"The stove-lid is broke on the stove Vhatyer gotter stay and keep the smoke i comicbooks.com