Judge — January 26, 1889 — page 6: what you’re looking at

Machine-transcribed from the original scan — historical spelling and the odd misread are preserved.

254 JUDGE SEN FENCES PASSED BY THE LIFE IN DEATH. JUDGE. S arule our children are our virtues and vices personified. ‘The strictest mothers generally make the most indulgent grandmothers. Better to starve upon crumbs from the king’s table than to feast with brutes. Though it may boast high connections, jealousy is the most petty of all passions. A man’s moral shortcomings never ex- ceed mere peccadilloes, while the same faults A haven of refuge. in a woman are crimes against— what? Her sex. A little strange, is it not ? It is impossible to yo through life with- out more or less expense to one’s temper and purse. Sex has morally no prerogative. Conse- quences are thé same the world over, and Nemesis is impartial in her avengements, With what a subtle wisdom are moulded some of our most common expressions—for instance, the phrase “ falling in love.” How many lose all equilibrium and plunge head- long, body and soul, and how few succeed in ¢ it a matter purely of rising. Things come about very strangely some- times. There would be a good deal of hard and prolonged staring if the goddess of wi 3.—Righteous wrath. PROVIDING AGAINST CONTIN- GENCIES. HE valet of a well-known man about town was in the habit of getting terribly “loaded.” * But supposing you were to be found in the street in such a condition?” asked his master when the culprit was * sobering up” after an unusally prolenged “ bender.” “Never fear for me, sir,” was the auda- reply. “I always keep a few of your ng cards in my pocket in case of acci- dent.” —The tables turned. -A QUESTION OF FORM. Vallerby—" Huh! 1 kain’t: see, Mose Johnsing, why yo’ wear a striped shirt at dis time o' year! ‘Tain't good fawm.” Johnson—* Good fawm! What can a niggah know ‘bout good fawm who has to wear meal-bag trousers ‘cause he kain’t yet his feet through any others?” ODDITY OF THE SEASON. To the man ‘who'motion lacks ; Iu imatters not how slow he goes, He cannot help make tracks THE MODERN WAY. Caller (at front door)—" Does Miss Walsh rascide here ?” Woman of the house—" Ves; if you will dom were suddenly to appear on earth, and with her wand separate every kindly step into the parlor I'll call her. (Goiny to the kitchen door.) molecule of right from every particle of wrong, And the least surprise Bridget, an Irish lady is in the parlor who wants to see you.” would not be that felt by religious and political bodies. Miss Walsh— An’ didn’t she sind down her caird, mum?" A CHAPTER FROM REAL LIFE. Mr. Kainso (oriting)—"* My own darling: Incidentally hearing of the Mr. Katuso (em years afterward, resurrecting a garment worn ten years bequest which your late uncle made to you, and that you still have some regard tefore)—" By the great homn-spoon! if I didn't forget to mail that letter to for one whom circumstances caused to leave you in a moment of unthinking Nelly!" passion, I venture to ask you to allow me to renew my suit.” comicbooks.com